💋 Seducing Our Boss | NamJin

61 💋

Seokjin's POV:

I crouched down on the floor and lay there, crying my eyes out. The tears burned my cheeks, as well as stained them while they descended from my blinded irises. Namjoon held onto me as I buried by face into his chest, sobbing.

I didn't say anything and neither did he. We just stayed on the floor, wallowing in our own sorrow. While I appreciated Namjoon's presence and the way he was comforting me, I didn't want to bring him down anymore.

I've already kept him up at night within each nightmare I wake up screaming from. This must be wearing down on him more than me. So, as the days went by, I tried to complete a few tasks on my own. Yet, the pain within my chest was weighing on me like a rock.

In order to relieve the pain, the best option would be to cry for a while and let the pain drain away, momentarily. But I didn't know when or where to find my release. I couldn't find it.

My days got darker and darker each awakening moment of my life. Namjoon eventually had to leave me to go back to work, which I nearly forced him to go back to, since he refused to let me stay by myself for six to eight hours.

Before leaving, he told me I couldn't move from my bed until he would return. I agreed with him and obeyed him, because I knew this was for my own safety... But what he didn't know, was that I stopped caring about myself a long time ago.

With my brother's departyre, I felt like my own life drifted away along with him. There were so many things on my mind that I wanted to say.

There were many things I still haven't said.

Being this alone in such a big house makes me feel small. I might not be able to see the walls, but I feel them closing in on me, making my body shake.

Ignoring Namjoon's rules, I gently got up from the bed and used a cane to guide me out of the room I felt trapped and suffocated in. My first obstacle was getting down the stairs.

"I have to do it... One way or another... I have to get out of here." I thought to myself, embracing the staircase rail, seeking another option on how to get downstairs in a safe way.

Using my hands and feet as a new set of eyes, I unknowingly guided myself down the stairs, sitting on the staircase to avoid the risk of falling again. With the help of my arms and legs, I somehow managed to make it back down the stairs without falling.

I instantly found the way to the restroom and sighed. The last time I showered, Hyunseok
was by my side.

The last time I spoke to him was after I got out of the shower...

And the last words I told him...

~flashback~

"W...what? Why, we've always called each other that, and you know it." Hyunseok's voice, showing me disappointment.

The way I stared at an unknown direction, only assuming I was staring at his face.

"Because as of today, you and I are no longer brothers." I still remember how he laughed.

Such a contagious laughter, yet I found no laughing matter in the situation we were in.

"Seok 1, do you realize how ridiculous you sound right now? Come on! We're literal twins, man!!" His cocky shouting made me lose my temper... And that's when I said...

"Hyunseok, do me a favor and get out."

~~~

"I knew it... It was my fault he died. If I wouldn't have pushed him away, then this would have never happened! Of course.

How could I have been so blind- Well... I am. But, metaphorically speaking, I was blind enough to let him walk out of my life, never once knowing that... I wouldn't be with him again.

I- I caused his death! And I don't deserve to burden Namjoon...

I don't even deserve to be alive..." My mind wasn't cooperating with my body at the moment, as I took a single step inside of the shower, unaware that it was slippery.

My foot began to slide back and forth, and I could feel my weakened bones weigh on me.

For a moment, my mind went blank when my body collided against the tub, and the last thing I remember, was opening my eyes to see a tall figure standing above me.

~~~

"Namjoon..."