The Ludicrous Escapade

French Man Be Hungry

Kakyoin tilted the lid on the teapot. He noticed your curious gaze and decided to explain what he had done, "This is a sign to let them know we want more tea. If you do this in Hong Kong, they'll bring you seconds." A woman walked over while carrying a different tea pot and poured the drink into Kakyoin's cup, "Also, when they pour tea..." He tapped his finger on the table twice, "This means thank you." The waiter smiled and walked away.

You stared at Kakyoin, impressed, "Wow, you know the customs of other places quite well, it would seem. Do you travel often?"

He gave an almost sad smile, "I go on trips with my family from time to time. What about you?"

You thought for a moment, "I've been to a few different places, and I've done my best to learn more languages in my spare time. I mostly stay at home though."

A silver haired man tapped your shoulder, "Excuse me, do you have a moment? I'm a tourist from France, and I'm having a hard time with the kanji on the menu." He closed the red and gold menu and gave you a pleading look. "Would you please help me out?"

Jotaro glared at the French Man, "You're annoying. Go away." He gestured for him to leave.

You gave the tourist a bright smile, "I'd be happy to help you with the menu." You then poked Jotaro's shoulder, "JoJo, go bring another chair so he can sit with us."

He narrowed his eyes at you, "Like hell I will. He's a grown man, he can get one himself."

And so that's what the French man did. He placed the wooden chair between you and Jotaro which earned him yet another annoyed glare. He sat down with a relieved smile, "Merci beaucoup." He handed you the menu.

You opened the list of foods, "So, what is it that you want to order?"

The man thought for a moment, "Well, perhaps something with-"

He was cut off by Joseph, "I'll order for all of us. I've been here enough times to know what's good." He called over a waiter and pointed to several things while the waiter scribbled it down, "We'll have this, this, this... And this, too. Oh, and this." The waiter left, leaving your whole group to wonder what exactly the old man had ordered.

You closed the French man's menu and set it on the table. "Sorry, I suppose I wasn't much help after all."

He put a hand on your shoulder as he waved away your apology, "Don't worry about it Mademoiselle, that very fact you wanted to help warms my heart." It was impressive how well he was ignoring the the holes being burned into his back by Jotaro's glare.

Before long, food was set onto the table. Along with more empty bowls than were probably necessary. Avdol scanned over the various dishes, "This looks like food with beef, fish, clams, and frog, but..."

Kakyoin gave an almost disgusted look, "Indeed. This is rather different."

Caesar moved his gaze to his best friend, "Joseph, what the hell did you order?"

Jotaro seemed rather indifferent, "I knew this would happen."

The French man was not exactly pleased with the arrangement. Joseph laughed, "Well, it doesn't matter. It's on me! It doesn't matter what you order, it's all delicious! Alright, everyone, dig in." Joseph grabbed a dish and started piling food into it. Hesitantly the rest of you started to eat too.

Kakyoin slurped up the inside of a clam, "Oh, this is..."

Joseph leaned forward, "Well? It's pretty good, isn't it?"

Caesar hummed in content as he ate a bit of frog, "It's certainly not as good as the pasta back home, but it'll suffice."

The French man held a pair of chopsticks and reached for a plate of veggies, "Well, they've certainly taken a lot of time to prepare this. Look, these carrots... They're shaped like stars." He brought it closer to his face, "They remind me of something..." Everyone stopped what they were doing to stare at the French man. "That's right. Someone I know has this exact mark on their neck..."

"You..." Started Kakyoin, "Are you another...?"

The French Man places the carrot on his neck and a rapier sprung out of one of the soupy dishes. The man's other hand, which had remained on your shoulder, pulled you closer to him.

"Mr. Joestar, look out!" Shouted Avdol.

The rapier sliced at the old man, but he blocked the attack with his metal hand. "It's a stand!"

Avdol flipped the table over, spilling food every where, "Magician's Red!" His Stand came out and sent a wave of fire at the silver Stand. With a swirl of its rapier, it had the flames spiral around the blade instead. The Stand flung the fire at a table and created a clock somehow.

Caesar cursed to himself, "Damn it, another Stand user..."

"H-His sword is so fast..." Commented Kakyoin.

"My Stand holds The Chariot card!" Spoke the French Man as his Stand posed behind him, "Silver Chariot!" His eyes bored into the Egyptian Man, "Muhammad Avdol, it appears that you want to die first. I've made a fire clock on that table! I will kill you by the time that clock burns twelve!" He let go of your shoulder, "Go ahead and stay with your comrades, I have no need for hostages." He crouched down slightly and whispered in you ear while winking, "But I'll treat you to dinner when this is over, okay?"

He gave you a light shove and you gave the man a questioning look as you stumbled away from him and into the waiting arms of Caesar. You whispered to your Italian friend, "The French Man's behavior is quite odd for someone who'd be working for Dio. He even offered to buy me dinner..."

The Italian looked at you curiously, "You don't think that..." He pointed at his forehead and you nodded. "Do you think I'd be able to hit him with my Hamon from here? Would it work with it still in his head? I don't even know where his stand is."

You rested your chin in your hand, "Good point. It would be difficult to find an opening when you don't even know what's closed."

You and Caesar stopped your conversation when you heard Avdol talking to the French Man, "Your sword is quite fast indeed. It's amazing, but do you really think you'll defeat me by the time the flames on that table strike twelve?" He pointed a finger at the attacker, "Aren't you being rather conceited, Mister...?"

"Polnareff..." He glanced down and closed his eyes, "Allow me to introduce myself." He looked back up with open eyes and a smile, "Jean Pierre Polnareff."

"Merci beaucoup." Responded Avdol. "I appreciate your introduction. But..." He swipes his finger through the air and the table erupted in flames. "Monsieur Polnareff, don't assume that my flames burn upward or downwind as they would in nature. It is called Magician's Red because it burns flames freely."

Silver Chariot stuck its sword into the wooden floor and Polnareff rested his hand on the handle, "In the beginning, this world was engulfed in flames. I expect nothing less from Magician's Red, who controls the flames that suggest the beginning of all things. But, you say I'm being conceited?" He opened a hand to show several coins, "You're saying that my swordsmanship is mere conceit?!" He tossed the coins into the air and pierced through them.

Joseph gasped, "He sliced through five coins the moment they lined up!"

Jotaro saw what his old man didn't, "No, take a closer look."

Kakyoin listened to Jotaro, "That's..."

Avdol seemed to lose a bit of confidence, "I-I see... there are flames between each coin."

Polnareff smirked, "It appears you understand what this means. It is not conceit. My Stand has the power to sever even fire! It can slash the very air and create gaps between nothingness and nothingness. Which means your Magician's Red is powerless before my Silver Chariot." The stand faded away and the coins clacked against the floor. Polnareff suddenly appeared behind the group.

Everyone quickly turned to look at him. Caesar spoke up, "When did he..."

Polnareff glanced at the group over his shoulder, "The card that my Stand has, The Chariot, suggests conquest and victory. I don't mind taking care of you in this cramped little space, but, Avdol, you'd be able to use your flame abilities in a much more open space, no?" He put his hand on the wall, "It would be fitting for my Stand to defeat you under those circumstances." He gazed off into the distance, a determined look on his face, "A fitting victory." He moved out of the door, "All of you, outside!"

You shrugged, "I guess we better follow him then." The others glanced among themselves before mumbling in agreement. So, in order to defeat the French man by the name of Jean Pierre Polnareff, the six of you went outside.