7. Wine and whims

568 27 81
                                    

17/12/2
3046 words

Just a little filler for y'all. Next chapter is going to get juicy.

Mentions of self harm in this chapter, please be careful my loves. You are loved and appreciated in this word and I am so fucking proud of you for waking up today.

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I woke up panting and shaking, a thin layer of sweat coating my skin, my stomach was flipping violently and my fingers began to search for something to release the violent tension that was swarming through my body. Silent tears were falling down my cheeks and all I wanted to do was scream, I had no idea what was happening. I let out a chocked sob which stirred Draco next to me. He mumbled something that I barely registered as the urge for some kind of... some kind of pain got worse. It had been years since I'd felt like this... I chocked again tugging on the hem of the duvet.

I felt strong arms wrap around me as I struggled for air, "y/n? Y/n, what's going on?"

I tried to speak but the words stuck in my throat.

"Shit." He muttered, coming up behind me and pressing his chest against my back, "breathe. Follow my breathing."

I focused on his words the best I could trying to resist. I gave in quickly dragging my nails across my wrists, immediately he was grabbing onto my hands to stop me as I struggled against him.

"I need you to let me inside your head. Love, can you let me do that?"

I tried to mouth yes but all I could do was shake beneath him.

"Y/n you need to give me permission, it's the law."

I nodded weakly and squeezed onto his hands. I felt him exposing my thoughts and telapathizing with me. All of a sudden his voice rung clear in my ears.

"What's happening?"

"I-I don't know." My thoughts chocked.

"Can you tell me how I can help?"

"Stop me from... stop me from hurting myself, please."

And then we were back, his hands clutched tightly onto my wrists as I writhed and struggled against him.

"Breathe with me." He whispered gently. I tried with him but it wasn't working.

"I-i ca-an't." I chocked, incoherently.

"Y/n, I want you to tell my five things you can see, can you do that?"

I nodded. "T-the dresser, a t-towel, your... bag, the cu- the cupboard and the b-bookcase."

"That's it, now how about four things you can touch?"

I felt my breathing begin to slow a little, "t-the blanket, your skin, the bedframe and the c-comforter."

I leaned back into his chest, my body relaxing.

"Better?"

"A little." I panted, still squeezing his hands, "thank you."

"Where did that come from?"

"It- It happens when my e-environments change quickly."

"And when was the last time?"

I gulped, "when y-you left."

His head fell into the crook of my neck, "fuck."

I went to stand up to go to the bathroom but my legs immediately gave out on me. A stabbing pain shot through my core and waist and I fell back onto the bed.

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