Amethyst || Harry Styles

Twenty-six

i should be working on my university essays...but i'm not hahaha oops? 

==========================

Twenty-six 

With a black felt tip pen in my mouth, I nibble the end as my hand strums my guitar. The sound rings throughout my room, my mind reeling for lyrics. I think back to the confident, yet broken girl that I have started developing feels for, and instantly I think of something perfect to write down. 

I carefully rest the guitar on my lap and grab my brown journal, taking the pen in my mouth to write down the lyrics that came to mind. 

'Cause I wanna wrap you up
Wanna kiss your lips
I wanna make you feel wanted 

My heart hurts, the pain physically spreading everywhere in my chest as I look over the song that I have so far. I knew when we starting hanging out I have developed a bit of a crush on her, but tried to deny it as much as I could, up until she kissed me. When that happened it was impossible to hold it back. And it was useless to try and shake those feelings off because I am already in too deep, I'm writing a song about her for fuck sake's! 

This vulnerability that I have now worries me greatly. I know I am putting myself in a situation where I can get my heart torn apart, but I can't seem to get away from it. As I said before, I am already in too deep. Plus, the simple possibility of Jasmine potentially liking me back makes me want to stay in this position and not run away. 

More lyrics come to mind, my hand quickly scribbling them down in case I suddenly forget. 

And I wanna call you mine
Wanna hold your hand forever
And never let you forget it
Yeah, I wanna make you feel wanted 

"Dada?" I hear Ella say. I softly close the journal, placing the pen on top of the cover as I look at Ella. She curiously looks at me as she enters my room, jumping onto my bed besides me. "What are you doing?" She sing songs. 

"Writing a song." I say, smiling down at her. 

"Oh! Is it for me?" She asks, her face fully brightened up. I chuckle. 

"Yes it is," I say. It's not a total lie because I was actually going to write a song for her and sing it on her birthday. "But it's a secret, so shhh." I whisper, pressing my index finger against my lips. 

"Shhh." Ella mocks while giggling with excitement. 

"What's up?" I ask, leaning down to kiss her head. 

"I want to make cookies." She smiles at me. "Nutella cookies."

"If nana finds out how much Nutella you are eating, she will be very upset with dada." I say, earning a pout from her. "Okay, fine. Let's make some cookies." I crave in, unable to say no to Ella. Sometimes it can be a very bad thing, but I can't deal with Ella pouting with her shoulders sagging low.

"Yay!" She yells, jumping off of my bed. I chuckle, placing the guitar besides me before following Ella to the kitchen. 

"What's the occasion for?" I ask, lifting her up from the armpits so she can reach the kitchen sink to wash her hands. 

"I want to see Jazzy. I miss her." 

I freeze up, my eye twitching slightly as a jolt of fear and shock flows through my body. It was just two days ago when I told her we should wait, it's too soon for us to see each other again. 

"Dada, you can put me down now." I hear Ella say. Her words brings me out from my thoughts, my mouth forming an 'o' when I see her wiggling around in my grasp.

"Sorry, Els." I gently place her down on the ground and wash my hands too. "So you are making cookies for Jasmine?" 

"We are making cookies for Jazzy." She smiles up at me. Something clicks inside of my head and I find myself blushing deeply. Jesus Harry, find your chill. 

"Nutella cookies, right?" I ask, coughing into my hand, then mentally groaning since I need to wash my hands again.

"Yes, dada." She claps her hands besides me.

I laugh at her short height and carry her onto the counter. She sits on the side, smiling widely since I only let her sit there when we are cooking or baking. I walk to the closet and take out our aprons and chef's hats. I get the small pink apron with butterflies all over it, and hand it over to to my little girl. She slips it on, me tying it for her. 

I put mine on also, along with my chef's hat. When I saw it in the store, in a pack for two, one big one and one small one, and I knew that I had to get it for me and Ella. 

Ella giggles when I put the hat on her, her hands immediately flying up to the hat to touch it. I wrap my arms around her body tightly and give her a big, slobbery kiss to her cheek. She giggles some more, a wide smile on her face that makes me really happy. 

I walk to the cupboard, taking out all the ingredients I need, scattering it on the counter, along with bowls and the electric mixer. I measure out the ingredients one by one, and give it to Ella to pour into the bowl. She then uses her claimed wooden spoon, that she always holds onto whenever we cook or bake, mixing all the ingredients together, giggling as she does so. I smile as I watch her, turning on the oven since I forgot to do before we started making the dough.

"Dada, I want to eat it." She says, putting her hand into the bowl.

"No, Ella. Not yet, take your hand out of there." I say, giving her a goofy look. She giggles, putting her hand back to her side. I walk up to her and look into the bowl. "Great job with the mixing, princess." I say, using the wooden spoon to do a bit more mixing since she missed a few spots.

"Thank you, dada." She smiles. "When will it be done cooking? I want some nooww."

"I know, baby." I laugh. "You can eat some in fifteen minutes." 

I grab the pan and start placing little balls of the dough evenly on the surface. When all of it is filled up, I place the pan in the oven and put a timer for 10 minutes. 

=

"Daddy, these are so good." Ella says, tears basically coming out of her eyes as she takes another bite. I start to feel genuinely concerned for my daughter. She's smiling but it also looks like she is about to cry...over Nutella cookies...

"They are." I agree with her. "But are you okay?" I ask, seeing tears now rolling down her cheeks. "Did you burn your tongue or something?" 

"No, dada! I am not okay!" She says, stuffing the rest of the cookie into her mouth. "I want to marry these." Ella grabs another cookie, devouring it in seconds. That's her fifth one.

"Oh, my. Ella, sweetie, I think you had enough for now. There's not going to be enough for Jasmine." I joke, taking out the milk from the fridge. I pour some in her cup and hand it to her, giving her a look that says 'drink all of it'. But Ella takes a few gulps and places it besides her, unfinished. 

"I'm going to get ready!" Ella says, holding her arms up. I hold her waist and carefully place her down before she starts running to her room.  I shake my head with a smile on my face, starting to clean up the kitchen. 

I put all the equipment we used in the dishwasher, using a cloth to clean the counter from flour, split milk, Nutella, and the list goes on. Basically a portion of all the ingredients we used is laying on the counter. 

I hear a knock at the door and quickly wipe my hands on my apron before unlocking it. As I start opening the door, a hand pushes it wide open, a girl with purple hair abruptly pushing me back against the wall. My eyes widen with surprise, fear taking over my body as I expect her to lash out on me for a reason I don't quite know. 

I look at her and see her eyebrows furrowed, her lips in a thin line. I am about to speak up, to ask her what's wrong, but instead I am cut short by her lips pressing against mine, kissing me hard with such eagerness and devotion.