one shots || N.R

Learning to love

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Natasha had never felt love, not true love. From such a little age she as told, manipulated that she didn't deserve it, she was a monster and it framed her to feel like she didn't need it, love didn't want her. It was only when you came along she slowly started to face them as lies.

But when you arrived she was distant, you had tried to try and connect with her as you could sense the pain she was facing from her mind all the time, bullying her because of what she was ordered to do. It broke her, not that she would tell anyone but you can tell, the deep breath she would pull in when no one was looking, the way her posture faltered when she was alone, the way she stayed silent when no one talked to her, she wouldn't start a conversation only when someone would converse with her would she talk. But no matter what you did, she wouldn't accept that someone was there to be there for her. She wouldn't allow herself to learn to love.

The team let her to it and that's what angered you, they knew she was distant but didn't bother to try and bring her in to fun things leaving her to face the voices in her head.

And Tony tonight had actually invited the whole team to sit and watch a movie which they all agree to. When you came to the lounge there was only 5 chairs. "Where's Natasha's chair?" You ask. "Oh don't worry she won't be here," Tony waved. She was there. You turned towards the door to see her standing there face static, not showing what she was really feeling. Though you knew. You knew that they hurt her. But before you could say thing she had walked out. "Well done sh*t heads." You scoff and walk out after her.

When you arrived at her room you softly knocked on her door. "Natasha.." you mumble looking down. "Can I come in?" You ask even quietly. You heard the door unlock probably meaning you could and you slowly opened the door. And walked in. She was sat on her bed reading a book making you frown. "Do you want to watch a movie with me?" You asked kindly. "What makes you think I want to?" She scoffed. "I know you do" you mumble fiddling with your fingers. She didn't say anything and you silently took it as a yes.

You quickly ran out of her room back to your room and dug though all your blankets on your bed to find your laptop and bolted to the kitchen to grab some already chopped up fruit and made it back to her room. To find her reading again. "I thought you left" she mumbled not looking up. "I got snacks and my computer" you smile when she looked up.

She shuffled up to make room for you to sit down and you put the computer in between the two of you and the fruit in front of the computer. You could see that she was tense, her straight back, eyes not living off the screen. But you decided to leave it, let her ease herself into feeling comfortable around you rather than pressure her. It takes time, given all the years, that's what she needs.

At the end of the film, you could tell she has relaxed a little but still remained tense. "Thank you" she mumbled as you got out of the bed. "Anytime, again next week?" You asked with a smile which she returned slightly "sure". "Goodnight" you wave before leaving.

Throughout the week you've been trying your hardest to try and make Natasha comfortable around and she did become a little less tense but you knew that that would come with time.

It was movie night again and instead of going to the team you went to Natasha's room, being already prepared with snacks and drinks.

You arrived at Natasha's door and knocked lightly. She opened it this time and sent you the faintest of smiles. "Hey" you smile and walk in. "How are you?" You ask whilst setting up the film. "Okay I guess" she shrugged. You didn't really know what she was into so you but on back to the future. She seemed okay with that. You handed her her bowl of fruit and drink. And you sat and watched the film.

When the film had come to an end, Natasha had fallen asleep so you packed up as quietly as you could trying not to wake her. And gently placed her blanket over her. "Goodnight Nat" you whisper before closing the door and heading back to your room.

The next day you noticed that Natasha was more... free in a way. This morning she didn't stay in her room like she always did. She came into the kitchen and made some breakfast then came and sat next to you. Which took everyone by surprise. "Don't" you warn the boys but Tony couldn't help his blabber mouth. "Is everything okay Nat?" He asked making Natasha feel embarrassed and she stormed away back to her room. "Well done" you scoff and go after her.

Your at her door, "Nat can I come in?" You asked softly knocking. You heard a faint yes and opened the door. She was just sat on her bed eating her breakfast not doing anything else. "Hey Nat don't listen to them." You coming to sit next to her. She doesn't say anything. You pull your arm away from your body to signal for her to hug you and smiled sadly and shuffled over into your arm. This was new territory for the both of you as you had never made contact before but it felt right. As you draped your arm over her shoulder, you felt her snuggle into you more.

You were both sat in a comfortable silence but you heard the odd sniffle coming from her. You rubbed your hand up and down her arm trying to soothe her. "Thank you" she mumbled as she pulled away. "You don't need to say that" you whisper smiling softly.

When it was movie night once again, you two decided to join the team in the lounge having you and Nat grow close. You were sprawled out over a little couch when Natasha came in and sat practically on you. Making you groan and her smile. "Did you have to?" You mumble schooching over for her. "Yes" she smiled.

"So uh you two, are you a.. thing?" Tony asked making Natasha go shy. She went to get up but you tired to pull her back down. Unfortunately she was too strong and pulled herself away scurrying out. "Seriously man,... what is your problem" you scolded him as he raised his hands.

You sprang out off the couch and ran after her to her room.

"Natasha" you say as you knocked. There was no answer but you went in anyways. "Hey" you smile as you came to sit with her. "Why'd you take off?" You asked her. "Is it true?" She ignored you and went straight to the point. "What?" You asked slightly bewildered. "What Tony said... is it true?" She explained shyly. You didn't want to scare her off, it had taken nearly a whole month for her to even talk to you properly. "If you want it to be..." you whisper turning your head to look into her eyes.

"I want it" she nodded before pulling your face into hers for a kiss. It was soft, tender yet so firm and demanding.

Having the need to breathe, you pull away briefly before she cupped your face once again and brought your lips back to hers.
*
''Twas the next day and you were sat at the breakfast counter eating well.. breakfast when Natasha came in with a bit of a spring in her step to make some breakfast. This time not really giving one about that the team had to say, she situated herself right next to you. And began eating.

Only when she was finished, she got up to put her plate in the sink and she sauntered over to you "I'm going to go train" she said with a smile. "I'll be there in a few" you say quickly finishing to meet her in the training room.

As you walk in, she grabbed you by the waist and kissed you feverishly. She lifted you up so you were straddling her waist hands supporting the underneath of your thighs. "Training can wait" she mumbled against you running out of the room causing you to squeal.

An
A long-ish one for you :)
To anyone who is even thinking about taking business as a class do yourself a favour and don't. I've spent pretty much the whole weekend doing coursework and I feel so drained. Ugh.
Thank you for reading, I love you all! <3
Stay safe everyone and love yourself 🤍🤍