Loki one-shots fanfiction ♡

39. breathing with the lungs of all things

The last time Loki could actually sleep without fearing someone would come and hurt him when he was in his most vulnerable stage, was when he was still Asgard's prince, which, in its own right, felt like a lifetime ago.

It stood to reason that he was extremely exhausted. If he could only close his eyes and rest, just for a little while.

He knew better than that.

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Pairing: Loki/Mobius

This was inspired by Loki series season 1 episode 2 and also I've been asked by some lovely people on Instagram and AO3 if I could write this, so here it is. Happy reading!

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The first time it happened Loki jerked his head with rapid blinks so he was somewhat proper awake in time before sleep could take him. He looked at the man opposite the table from him; Mobius still had his nose buried in those piles of files, he didn't notice him... dozing off.

Loki pressed his lips into a thin line as he picked up some random file, one of the many scattering in front of him, to pretend to be invested in. His head was killing him, his eyelids never felt so heavy, and his vision was blurry that all the letters seemed to melt together, making it almost impossible for him to focus and read. (And when he tried to focus and read, it resulted in the doubling of his headache, which led to him failing to understand a sentence he'd just read) Loki suppressed a yawn, then, and slightly shook the file in his hands once, like that would make him more awake, more alert and less like what the people of earth called a zombie.

Though the fact the task at hands being oh-so boring hadn't helped boost his energy up. He had always been better than Thor at paperwork, true, but those were the time when he, still as a prince, actually got decent sleep schedule where he didn't have to worry if his closing his eyes and letting his guard down meant someone would take advantage of that and kill him on the spot or worse.

He hadn't had any proper sleep in so long, ever since Thanos...

(Loki gulped as the memories stubbornly crawled its way up the back of his mind, tried as he might to bury it deep and never think of it again)

He was... exhausted, the bags under his eyes proved that, but sleep was not an option. To sleep, to rest, meant lowering his guard to nonexistent. There were people who meant him harm, everywhere he went there were enemies lurking in the corners, waiting for a perfect opportunity when he was weak, and he couldn't give them that. Wouldn't.

Loki took another glance at Mobius, like he was trying to tell if the man was waiting for him to doze off, to let his guard down. Although it seemed his company was genuinely interested in what he was reading and nothing else, Loki was never the one to trust. To trust was to make oneself vulnerable.

He made a low growl in his throat, flipping through the pages of the file in his hands like he was still here, like he hadn't lost his focus long ago and his very consciousness was on the verge of shutting down on its own.

His vision kept narrowing down. During the first couple times he fought them, but he could only fight so much. The next time it happened Loki felt his head loll downward, and he knew he should be snapping himself out of it, he knew he was losing the battle.

Part of him wanted to close his eyes and just let go. Whatever were to happen, he wouldn't care anymore. He just wanted... this, this rest, no matter how short, no matter how little. He was so tired, so exhausted. His body felt like it'd been drained out of energy.

He just wanted to let go.

If Mobius were to kill him in his sleep. But Mobius wouldn't... Mobius was... different. Although Loki had only known the man for a short period of time, there was something different about him.