"- 𝐀 𝐟𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐬𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐢𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐰𝐧 𝐣𝐨𝐲."
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𝐄𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐬 𝐁𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐯𝐨𝐥𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐑𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐩 ❉᯽❉
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The blurb is good. But I think it would be better if you added some interesting scenes and less of the talks in there. Readers like to get a glimpse of the plot. Any event or happening about character's would make the blurb more catchy and interesting as for now it only has self produced dialogues and messages except for the one in the beginning and one in the end.
Cover: ⅖
Only the title can be seen. The background is all smudged. I couldn't figure out what the background was. The theme of the story is fantasy and Hogwarts style, it would be much better if you take anything related to those terms. After that, the dark blue and black things, elements or figures in the background are all mingling together and are unable to portray the vibes. I would suggest you. change that.
Title: ⅖
It is pretty simple and overused. You can find many stories with the same title, available on wattpad. Title is one of those factors that catches the reader's attention and puts an influence on the reader about the story. Soulmate concept is too common in stories. The title used for the book shows that it is a simple story having the soulmate concept which is unable to get much attention. I would suggest you change that. I have a few recommendations regarding the title if you wanna have some.
Invisible Chains
Reaper of hearts
Burning papers
1st impression: ⅗
First impression of this story was not bad. It was neutral. The title made me think it's pretty simple. But the book has something else in it. The cover does a good job in attracting readers, which didn't go well in your book.
Reader's interaction: ⅘
It is pretty much.
Plot: 10/20
When I read the first chapters and moved forward, I thought that it's simply a story where the protagonist has to deal with abusive family and uncaring relatives then a simple love-breakup story having the same cliche story plans. The facts I mentioned above are the same in the story. It also deals with abusive relationships with parents, uncaring and unloving families. The protagonist is a carefree one and has an innocent, beautiful and pitiful personality. However, as it goes further, it has many elements and explanations of each and everything that makes it enjoyable.
The execution of the plot is pleasing and the way you have dealt with the situations is good. Everything is explained. Good Job.
Twist: 8/10
Truth to be said, the plot is simple but the literary techniques and the devices you have used have left me speechless. Such as metaphor, monologue, Rhyming etc,. The plot has many occasions where I was stuck and forced to read more and more. I am waiting for the next update and would love to see what happens next.
Grammar: 7/10
Your vocabulary is amazing and your grip on them is very strong. You have used perfect phrases and words in the right places. Only a few spelling mistakes are seen but they are barely noticeable.
Emotions: 8/10
Everything is perfect. The character's emotions are perfectly detailed. The emotions are the ones which make the reader understand the character better,they make the readers go crazy and feel the pain of the characters. The emotions are the ones which help us to understand the reason behind each and every action of characters. You did a good job in maintaining them and balancing them. Well done.
Character's development: 8/10
Each character is explained in detail. I could understand their thinking and their perspectives. I could interact with them better and see the reasoning in their mind for their every action. After that, the improvement in their characters can be seen. The characters changed throughout the story and the pace of their changing and developing of them was impressive.
Writing style: 7/10
Writing style is the key to your success as a writer. Your writing style is pretty good and captivating. I am impressed.
Overall: 8/10
Total: 70/100
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