Unchangeable

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"You-You want me to read your thoughts?"

"Indeed. I wanted you to let the thoughts of your peers into your mind before teaching you how to block them from entering."

I eyed Snape with a slight anger burning in my eyes, wishing I had known sooner that there were other options to relieving myself of the burdening headaches that came with Legilimency. Knowing this emotion would not get me anywhere in terms of my training, however, I forced it into the pit of my stomach and awaited Snape's instructions.

"What do I need to do first?" I asked, through a clenched jaw. Watching as Snape's eyes narrowed, an eyebrow of his quirked, unimpressed. "Close your eyes and ground yourself like we did in your flying lessons." Nodding, took a deep and calming breath and closed my eyes in the Room of Requirement. After a week of countless tests and prodding and poking on behalf of Madam Pomfrey, Snape and I were finally allowed to resume my training.

Snap began to let his thoughts penetrate my mind moment after moment, as I tried to fight them off. It was the most mentally exhausting thing I had ever tried to do before; even more so than advanced spells I had practised beyond my years in the past. By the end of our session, I was doused in sweat and stood leaned against a pillar, catching my shaky breaths as best as I could.

A bottle of pumpkin juice outstretched towards me, which I took without hesitation and downed within moments. Snape knew I had had enough. He knew I needed to rest. "We shall try again tomorrow. And for the following week before I leave." The man's monotonous voice reverberated through the room as he took his cloak from the ground and walked towards the door.

"Professor?" I gulped, gasping for air as I stood upright to face him. "Why didn't you use a time-turner to go back and save my mum and dad?" Sniffing, I wiped a bead of sweat from my forehead and tossed the empty bottle into my backpack. It was a question that had long plagued my mind ever since I found out about Hermione possessing the magical artefact. Of everyone I knew, I would have thought he would search for any means of saving my mother's life.

"Time turners are not as easy to come by as you may think, Emerald. Your friend, Miss Granger, was one of few to gain access to one so effortlessly." The man paused at the slight anger and frustration in his voice, turning to face me with saddened eyes. "I looked everywhere for one. I even tried to break into the Department of Mysteries...Time turners only allow one to travel twenty four hours back. But by the time I found one...It was too late." The man's dark eyes brimmed with tears at his words as I regretted asking the question.

"I don't think it would have changed anything, you know." My lips pursed as I grabbed my bag and slung it over my shoulder.

"What makes you think that?" Snape's voice echoed through my ears as I crossed paths with him and began making my own way to the door. Turning to face him, I finally met his coal eyes. "Harry told me that he tried to stop Remus from attacking me the night of the Whomping Willow. I think some things in the past aren't meant to be changed."

Snape's eyes flickered with guilt for a brief moment and nodded, joining my side as we walked out of the Room of Requirement; the empty halls allowing for our private conversation to continue without the worry of prying ears. "Your mother said something similar, once. She was always beyond her years. I remember one time-" Severus chuckled, then stopped abruptly; his smile dwindling as his gaze averted to the stone hallway in front of us. "Nevermind."

I placed my hand over his arm, bringing our footsteps to a halt as I forced him to turn and face me, "You can talk about her, you know? I like hearing stories about my parents." My words were convincing and desperate, as I waited impatiently for the man to resume reminiscing about his past. He did not, however, merely sending me a small smile, "Maybe another time."

***

The rest of the week passed quickly, say for the training hours I spent painfully trying to block Snape's mind from infecting my own. Few memories would bleed through. But I knew they were only ones that Snape wished for me to see. Before I knew it, he was leaving and the next full moon had approached.

I could feel myself strengthening with the new day, packing a bag for the night after Dumbledore agreed I stay with Remus (with great reluctance, I might add). Hagrid would be taking me Remus' home in Yorkshire. I dressed, braided my hair and added a little makeup before making my way down to breakfast. I had taught myself a concealment charm to cover the scar on my neck, although it created a slight sheen across my skin. Which was almost more obvious than the scar itself that lingered underneath. Once again, I knew I had grown for my clothes were beginning to tighten and I had started to curve in places I had expected. I was nearly thirteen, after all.

As Dumbledore had instructed, I would stay with Remus the night of the full moon and Harry's birthday was a few days after. Therefore, Remus would need to apparate me to Surrey on his birthday. A few days with my Godfather was better than none, I suppose.

It was cold in the Great Hall and lonely; as it always was during the summer holidays. I missed the outside world. The normality of the orphanage, regardless of the bad times I had whilst living there. Just being able to walk the streets of London without consequence. I needed this. I needed to get away from Hogwarts, if only for a few days.

Breakfast was as brief as I could possible make it, grabbing an apple from the table as a mid-journey snack before making my way to Hagrid's Hut, as I had the year prior. As unluck would have it, Fang would be accompanying us on our journey, due to Hagrid having some business to attend to in Diagon alley for a few days. Hagrid's dog had separation anxiety if left for more than several hours, so him accompanying us was necessary; even though he took up two-thirds of the buggy.

The trip felt longer than before; a few hours passing before we finally came to a halt outside an old cottage in Yorkshire. It was in slight disrepair and looked as though it had not been tended to in years. Remus waited by the wooden gate with an excited grin on his face, which I couldn't help but return as I fled from the buggy and jumped into his arms.

A low sigh of relief emitted from my Godfather, "How have you managed to grow so much in a month?"

Chuckling, I left his embrace and shrugged, "It felt like longer than a month, if I'm honest. How are you?" My eyes scanned him up and down, searching for any sign of illness or fatigue. He did look more tired than normal, but nothing compared to the usual exhaustion he would go through on the usual days leading up to a full moon.

"I'm fine. I took the last of my Wolfsbane potion this morning." The man justified, before his gaze drifted onto Hagrid, who was standing behind us with a slight look of scepticism in his eyes, "You uh...You both be safe tonight, alright?" I nodded, "We will. Thank you, Professor Hagrid." A small curl appeared through his lips at my mention of his nickname, and with a small nod, he ans Fang were on their way.

Remus turned to face me with a knowing look in his eyes, holding his wand up in the air, "Accio trunk." A suitcase with his initials whizzed up to us both, causing me to furrow my eyebrows in confusion. "Are we not going inside?" I asked, motioning towards the dilapidated cottage behind us. Remus scoffed, "You really think I'm going to let you stay somewhere like that?"

I glanced at the cottage, then back to my Godfather, "But, it's your home."

"It's not yours, Emerald. Take my arm." He changed the subject swiftly, extending his right arm for me to take. I obliged, feeling the same sensation I had felt the last time I attempted apparition; as though I was being pulled and twisted and sucked through a small tube before being spat back out again in a new place.

We were on a cobbled street with wrought, iron gates and a row of houses all identical to one another. Three storey, brick, black doors and windows. I recognised the park sitting opposite immediately. We were in London; not far from Wool's Orphanage. My stomach dropped. I wasn't going back, was I? Fear and dread echoed within me as I waited for Remus to speak. His next words, however, were not that of sadness or guilt at the thought of sending me back. They were, however, an incantation, as he waved his wand towards the row of houses.

They began to disperse, revealing another house hidden behind all the other ones. Remus eyed the new addition to the street with anger and hatred, but he began walking towards it, nonetheless. "Remus, exactly where are we?" I asked, following closely behind him.

"This was Sirius' childhood home; left to him after his mother passed away in 1985. Emerald...Welcome to Number 12, Grimmauld Place."

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