36 This Won't Do...

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As the day wears on we really make a dent in the pile, finally getting to the point where I can look around more without feeling guilty. So much of what we're unpacking, I've only seen on the net or in videos.

Anne is all about the details. She took her playroom concept from the original club and doubled it, allowing each to be more specialized. There are several catering to specific dynamics, such as a kennel and little's playland, whereas others are more about the atmosphere, like the dungeon. Of course, there are several more versatile rooms catering to the bulk of the community, but she spared no expense.

Having lived online for so long, looking up all the clubs within a reasonable distance I'm glad I came here. Her commitment to safe play and monitoring is the only thing that kept my experience from being so much worse.

There are several rooms that draw my attention but none more than the bunny loft. Bondage was what got me interested in this lifestyle to begin with, and although I find all forms interesting rope has always held a special place for me.

The room is set up for suspension and free-form bondage. Patrons can request whatever toys they may want in addition to what is set up but it's a riggers dreamland.

Anne has let slip multiple times about Jonathan's capabilities, and I've seen firsthand how easily he can tie a chest harness. I can't help but think he's holding back because of my setback.

Marilyn keeps reminding me that my recovery will be a journey and that it won't likely be a straight line. Setbacks like the one that happened are okay, and chances to learn, not a reason to beat myself up.

Through her guidance, I've been able to make sense of some of my feelings and fears, allowing me to pass that insight on to Jonathan. That communication has led to safer play and an understanding that lets Jonathan push my boundaries safely again.

Instantly my mind sewers to our last playtime, remembering how he guided me through each new experience. He gives me the time I need to come to terms but doesn't hold back nearly as much. Seeing myself surrendered like that at the end, used for his pleasure, brought me an indescribable feeling... one I want more of.

The last box I open is full of ropes as if the universe could read my mind and wanted to tempt me further. My fingertips dance across the different bundles, feeling the difference in texture from silky smooth to coarse and itchy. Like everything else, she picked out every colour in the rainbow but my eyes automatically go to the red bundle.

"Red is your colour," Anne murmurs. Her green eyes practically glow as she watches me.

I blush under her intensity but I pick up the bright red silky bundle, letting my mind go wild. "Will he ever be comfortable enough for this?" I whisper, desperation lacing my tone.

"Oh, sweetheart." She sighs. "Jonathan is a careful and calculating man. He cares deeply for you and would never do anything to upset the progress you've already made."

"I know." My shoulders slump and I feel guilty for questioning him. "And I love him for that. Sometimes I just want more, you know?"

Anne nods, her green gaze unfocused like she's deep in thought. "Do you tell him this?" She purses her lips at my silence. "Izzy, you know this lifestyle is all about communication. Jonathan is good but contrary to what it might seem at times, he's not actually a mind reader."

I smile, knowing exactly what she means. "I just don't want him to think I don't appreciate what he's already doing."

Anne tosses her head back, letting out a full belly laugh. "Izzy you couldn't hide your appreciation if you tried! And that's a good thing. You're very open. That makes it easy to see when you like something or don't."

"Oh," I gasp, not knowing this.

"Rope is fun though. You don't need a partner to play around with it, there are plenty of self-ties you can do." I feel like a kid on the edge of my seat as I wait for more. As if the universe is out to mess with me more her cell rings.

"Sorry Izzy, I need to take this." She offers me a small smile and slips away.

My jaw drops, feeling robbed as I sit there with my shiny bundle of rope just begging to be put to good use. Jack sees the look on my face and snorts out a laugh, drawing Beccas attention.

"Oh my god," Becca blurts out, grinning at me. "Who stole your orgasm?!"

"What?! No one!" I quickly look away, feeling my cheeks heat.

"Anne was about to impart some rope wisdom to our eager bunny and left her hanging," Jack replies with such glee.

Brat.

"I'm sure if you ask nicely, Becca can share," he teases.

"Don't look at me," Becca counters. She shrugs and pulls a bundle of soft lavender rope out of the box for a closer look. "I've never tried and Tony doesn't know how..."

Jack pulls a face, his shock clear as he looks at her. "Really?! I figured he'd tie you up just for some peace and quiet every once in a while. Umph-"

A swift backhand to his gut from Becca doubles him over as the annoyed woman glares at him. "I'll have you know he likes me as I am, thank you very much!"

"If you say so." He laughs, putting his palms up in surrender. Jack digs through the box and pulls out a royal blue bundle and grins. "Guess it's up to me to save the day once more!"

Becca rolls her eyes but I perk up, happy to pick up where we left off. I can't help but frown as Jack walks away, leaving me feeling like the butt end of a joke.

"First things first," he mumbles, digging around the bar. "Always be safe!" He returns holding a pair of scissors and sets them on the table next to us.

I nod, realizing that they could come in handy if there was a mishap. Moments like this make sense why it's best to learn from someone else. I never thought to grab scissors in case something went wrong.

"Chest harness or full body?" He asks, unravelling his rope.

"Full." Jonathan has already tied chest harnesses on me, I'm excited to try a full-body version.

"K, first thing is first, find the middle of your rope," he says as he gathers his two ends together then works his way back to the center.

I follow his lead unravelling the rope in my hands and finding both ends then running up the length to find the middle. The silky smooth rope has me itching to know how it would feel against my bare skin.

His first knot is a couple of inches from the middle and he slips it over his head, letting the knot rest on the back of his neck. He then proceeds to tie five more knots down the front.

I squirm, struggling to guide the leftover through my legs and up my back to go through the loop we started with. After feeling like a puppy chasing my tail I manage to get it and turn my attention back to Jack but he's no longer alone.

My stomach drops at the unreadable look on Jonathan's face as he watches me. Suddenly doubt washes over me, making me wonder if I should have been doing this without him.

Jonathan slowly shakes his head and walks towards me freezing me in place. I can't look away from his dark gaze as I struggle to read him.

"Bella, Bella," he chides, pursing his lips. "This won't do at all."

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A/N

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