CONNECTED. | sjy.

14: Realization

Jake's POV

Me and Heeseung are currently sitting on a bench outside Mika's apartment building, trying to figure out the situation. I'm worried she will stay away from us now, and we'll lose our friendship.

And I. Won't be with her. I promised to her. That i'll protect her. That i'll be on her side. That i'll be her friend. And i'm afraid I have low chances of pursuing those promises to her.

"Hey, you okay?" Heeseung spoke which made my thoughts halt.

"Yes, i'm fine. I'm just thinking what should we do." I said to him and drank my water.

"Before closing her door, she said that Minji told her to stay away from us" Heeseung said in a questioning tone.

"She might have threathen Mika. But for now, I think she needs some space. It's not just Minji who hurted her. It's also us." I retorted and remembered something.

"Hey Heeseung, do you have an idea why Mika cried when I said I didn't like her?" I said, changing the topic.

"Do you think she, maybe like-"

Heeseung interrupted my words. "No, she's just probably scared of us fighting. There's no other way Jake."

He said with an assuring tone.

Heeseung's POV

No, that can't be. Mika doesn't like Jake. I tried to distract my mind as to not think of that anymore.

We parted our ways as we cleared our minds and exchanged our farewells.

Timeskip

Mika's POV

It's the start of the week again. Time to go to school again. I sighed as I sipped my morning soup. The weather's really cold right now. Yhe floors more colder as I remembered what happened on the other night. I stomped my feet on my room to pick some warmers.

I opened the cabinets and saw Jake's jacket. He already cleaned it before at the hospital but why did he still bring it here?

I can't find any more jackets, I didn't have any. What should I do? I can't wear this.

I breathed heavily as I grabbed its hanger. I threw it in my bag, but I won't wear it. I'll maybe just ask somebody to give this to him later. I noticed the time as it was already time to go. I slipped on my shoes and left the apartment.

Timeskip

Jake's POV

I entered the classroom and saw few students sitted.

I sat on my space and saw Mika's chair beside me. I reminisced her face when I stare at her during class. To be honest, I actually enjoyed staring at her more than listening to the lectures. It's more beautiful of a sight. I smiled at the thought of it.

I laid my head down to rest since it's still early. I feel the classroom becoming more crowded and occupied with more presence. Then, I heard the chair beside me creak. Must be Mika.

I quickly raised my head and glance at the person sitting beside me. I frowned as I see an unexpected sight.
Wait, Minji?

"Good Morning Jake! You look so handsome." Minji cheerfully said to me.

"Uhm this is Mika's seat?" I sealed my lips at her.

"Mika didn't like this seat so might as well trade with her. Anyhow, i'm a better seatmate than her." She smirked at me seducingly.

I scoffed quietly at her response. Then I felt palms caressing my biceps. I glanced at her and saw her chuckling while scrolling her phone on the other hand. I gazed at her disgustingly and slowly leaned on the other side, creating a space on the both of us.

I looked at Minji's original seat, at the other side of the classroom, and saw the girl I wanted to say sorry to. Mika looks really pale. It's really cold right now. Most are wearing jackets and sweaters. Why didn't she wear anything? My jacket to be specific.

I sighed as I understand her side. She had her heads down, not wanting to break an interaction with anyone.

How I wish I could hold her right now.
Carress her. Comfort her. Hug her.

Flashback

It was the night of that day. After Heeseung and I parted ways. I headed straight home as I was very tired. I arrived at my bedroom and don't have any energy to change my clothes.

I plopped on my bed and stared at the window. The stars are so bright. The moon looking like the sun as how fluorescent it looks like. I remembered the story my mother always told me in the past when I can't sleep.

The moon was so in love with the star but he can't admit it. The star already likes another star and he was left out. He didn't have any chances nor confidence. Day by day, the moon started becoming smaller and smaller. Darker and darker. Until he became a crescent shape. Then the star he wanted to forget ran into him. The star said they were getting married with the other star. And the star also confessed to the moon that she actually liked him before. She was just afraid the moon didn't like her back. The moon was shattered at the star's words. If only the moon was not dumb, then the star and moon should have been together now.

I didn't really figured out the ending as I always dozed off in the middle of my mom's story telling. But it thought me something. It's being true to yourself and especially, to be brave. And I realized something.

I liked Mika's presence. She made me feel something I didn't feel before. It builds me something more. I felt like my heart was full. I felt occupied. I feel the convenience and the relief when I see her, smell her, hear her, anf feel her. I feel like we have a connection.

And I wanted more.

Stop being a fool.

Who are you trying to convince?
Heeseung or Yourself?

You can't lie to yourself.

Your brain might be against.

But your heart feels loved.

I widened my eyes and sighed heavily. I sat down on my bed. I looked at myself on my reflection on the mirror.

"That's it. I craved enough. I like her."