Anirudh- The Story Of A Misread Barrister

Chapter- 38: Bondita's Sweet Disease, Anirudh's Pursuit Of A Cure

Sleep did not greet me that night as my mind was totally occupied with constant judgements and arguments of what is right and wrong. Bondita's words kept ringing in my head. Every time I recollected the contents of her notes, I felt happy for all the affection that she held for me; at the same time a strange kind of nervousness or fear gripped my heart at the very possibility of what her feelings were projecting towards, as I still felt it was not the right age for her to take any big decisions. Bondita's letter clearly hinted her growing feelings towards me.

There was a time when Bondita used to speak things inappropriate for her age, based on what the society had fed her and I had to own some extreme measures to bring her onto the right path. However, back then, she was a child but not anymore. Now she is a teenager who can understand things better, even though she is still naïve and innocent. This is also an age when youngsters are high on hormones and develop romantic feelings towards the people they admire. So, I was unable to overlook the notes by considering it as a mere act of innocence. However, a part of my mind still urged me to give a benefit of doubt to her naivety.

Besides Bondita's letter, if there was something that stirred unrest within me, it was the conversation of the ladies who came to watch the dance. I shut my eyes tight, trying to forget what they had spoken.

"Just look at Bondita's eyes-they are full of love for Anirudh Babu.", said one woman, while her friend declared, "Our Anirudh is also not any less in this matter. He is preparing Bondita to become his perfect mate, his counterpart who can match him in everything. After all, he is a man of western education who must have set some standards for the woman coming into his life. All that he is doing now is making Bondita capable enough to become his wife."

I was aghast at these conclusions. It was when I understood the way society had interpreted our relationship and my responsibility towards Bondita. A wave of hopelessness hit me as I realized that the world cannot look at anything beyond the realm of profits and returns.

"Only when one removes the glasses of selfishness, can he see what selflessness looks like and understand that relationships can also be carried out without expecting anything in return. Well, the world is too immature to understand these things at this point.", I thought.

Once again, the purpose of my life ambition, that is, to change the ill mindset of people had been justified. This is also why I want to get Bondita educated, as she has all the abilities to bring a huge change in the thought process of mankind, but not for any selfish reasons; and definitely not for turning her into my perfect mate.

If it was any other time, I should have argued and made them understand how wrong they were in their thinking. Yet, this time I kept quite because somewhere deep down inside my heart, I held myself guilty for all this. Ever since I left the dance venue, I locked myself in my house and questioned my intentions for Bondita. I checked my actions, instincts, my character and personality. I cross-examined my own feelings and their purity. It's not that I gave importance to what others spoke about my equation with Bondita, but it was her words that impacted me more than anything and compelled me to do a self check. I felt dizzy due to this whirlpool of thoughts.

As I sat on the bed leaning my back against the headboard holding my head, I saw my alternate selves appearing before me. The one in teacher's attire said, "Hello, Mr. Anirudh Roy Chowdhary. I am Bondita's shikshak babu (teacher)." Then the other one in tennis costume greeted saying, "Hi Anirudh. I am Bondita's sakha babu (her best friend)".

"What are you'll here for?", I annoyingly questioned them.

"To clear the mess out of your head.", they replied together.