Broken, Honest, Beautiful

Mindless

"Camz are you awake?" Lauren asked the girl was was sleeping on her stomach, the way they used to

"Mhmm" Camila hummed

"I can't sleep." Lauren complained

"I figured." Camila laughed quietly and moved to look at Lauren

"What's up Lolo?" Camila asked reaching up to play with her fingers

"I don't know, I just can't sleep. Like things finally feel normal after a long time but I still can't sleep." Lauren explained with a sigh

"What if I sing to you?" Camila offered

"You never sing to anyone, except on stage." Lauren raised an eyebrow

"I know, but we're starting again remember?" Camila smiled intertwining their fingers and Lauren smiled staring at their hands

"Okay then." Lauren agreed

"What song?" Camila asked

"Skyscraper?" Lauren wondered

"I don't know, I uhm, haven't sung that in a while." Camila avoided eye contact nervously taking her hand away from Lauren's

"What's wrong?" Lauren asked taking Camila's hand back and stroking the back of it with her thumb

Camila took in a deep breath blinking back the tears threatening to spill

"Camz. You can tell me." Lauren promised, willing Camila to open up to her like she used to

"I listened to that song like everyday while you were away. The hate just seemed so much worse, you were always there to back me up and protect me when I get affected by it. But you weren't there." Camila mumbled wiping her eyes

"I'm so sorry Camila, but I'm here now right? Anyone who finds a flaw in you, I'd say they were crazy but they're not. Everyone has flaws, it makes us imperfect. No one is better than anybody else, and you need to remember that when people throw their irrelevant bullshit into your notifications." Lauren said finding the right words

"You always know what to say don't you Lauren?" Camila smiled

"I guess, you know I'll always be here for you, right? I'm not letting anything come between us again." Lauren promised squeezing Camila's hand

"I wanna cuddle." Camila pouted making Lauren giggle

"C'mere Camz." Lauren grinned cuddling Camila

"I could stay like this forever." Camila mumbled against Lauren's chest

"Me too. But we have a show tomorrow." Lauren huffed

"Can't we just have a lazy day until the show?" Camila asked

"Afraid not, its gonna be a busy day. It's going to be much better on stage now there's no tension between us now too, we can have our "Camren moments" again." Lauren smiled

"Yeah. I missed them." Camila smiled up at Lauren who looked down and smiled back at her

"The bus isn't moving tonight. Can we go for a walk?" Camila asked shyly

"Why? It's like 11pm." Lauren quizzed

"I mean, we don't have to. I just thought maybe we could lay on the grass and look at the stars."

"That sounds like a great idea." Lauren grinned enthusastically

"Yay!" Camila squealed

"Shh! Be quiet or you'll wake the others up." Lauren hushed her placing a hand over her mouth

"Sorry." Camila said but it was muffled by Lauren's hand

"Come on then." Lauren smiled grabbing a blanket and followed Camila out the bus

They walked a far enough distance away from the bus before they came to a field where Lauren placed the blanket down and they laid on it

"It's so beautiful." Lauren mumbled to herself

"I like to think every star is a good person who died watching over everybody. Wouldn't that be so cute." Camila spoke without looking at Lauren

"What about the bad people?" Lauren asked curiously

"I don't know, black holes or meteors I guess." Camila said thoughtlessly

"You have a beautiful mind Camz." Lauren noted looking at her

"You do too." Camila mumbled looking at one star in particular

"What are you looking at?" Lauren asked following Camila's gaze

"That star up there." She pointed up to a place in the sky

"What about it?" Lauren asked as she saw the star twinkle

"I don't know, but something made me drawn to it. Maybe it's someone I used to know." Camila wondered

"Perhaps. Some stars just shine brighter than others." Lauren said

"That doesn't make the others irrelevant." Camila challenged

"I know that, every single star makes up the sky." Lauren smiled up at them

"The sad thing is nobody would notice if one star disappeared because there are so many of them. Just like no one would notice if one person did because there are so many people. No one notices the smaller important parts of life, do they Lauren?"

Lauren was dumbfounded by the sincerity and meaning behind Camila's words, like she'd thought about these things before now.

"No, I guess you're right. But the stars around would notice the disappearance and the people who knew that person would notice theirs too. And just because they're gone doesn't mean they're forgotten or replaced."

"Are you talking about the stars or the people?" Camila asked tearing away her gaze at the star and looking at Lauren

"Both I suppose." Lauren replied looking up at the sky mindlessly

"Hmm.." Camila responded

There was a comfortable silence before Lauren broke it

"If I had died that night, do you think I would have become a star too?" Lauren asked Camila

"I think you would have shone the brightest of them all."