Broken, Honest, Beautiful

Hearts

The girls had all come off stage acting like they'd never experienced air before because the show was so energetic. "I don't understand how they can be so energetic, I'm so fucking exhausted." Lauren barely spoke because she could barely get air in her lungs. "I know, like I'm pretty sure that's the most intense show we've had." Ally agreed, the other 3 girls hummed and collapsed onto a couch. "Okay, one of us needs to get in the shower first s-" Camila started until Lauren inturrupted quickly "I'll go first, I mean..if that's okay?" Dinah looked at her questionably but nodded, "Go for it Laur." Lauren gave her a quick smile of thankfulness and headed to the shower to clean up. Lauren could barely stand up from exhaustion so she just sat in the shower washing her hair limply. It was touch and go that Lauren would fall asleep but Normani knocking on the door and the shouting of people backstage soon woke her up. "Coming!" Lauren tried to shout but it barely came out spoken. "Are you okay?" Normani asked when she took in Lauren's tired appearance, she looked more tired than the rest of them. "I'm gonna head back to the bus." Lauren slurred her words, she was barely able to form a sentence now. God did she need sleep. "I'll tell the girls, go on. We'll see you in a bit." Lauren trudged her way back to the bus and collapsed onto the couch, too limp to make it to her bunk. Camila was the next to come back on the bus, noticing how Lauren was spread out she looked less than comfortable. "Lauren wake up." Camila cooed and Lauren huffed "Shh, I'm sleepy" she mumbled making Camila laugh. "Just curl up a little, then go back to sleep." Lauren huffed again. "I'm too tired to move." Camila sighed and pulled Lauren's legs onto the couch properly, throwing a blanket over her. "Thank you." Lauren smiled sleepily, if that was the best Lauren could do then Camila was happy with it. As soon as Lauren's eyes slipped shut again, she was -dead to the world- asleep. "Lauren wake up honey, we're going out to eat." Ally shook her shoulder, the green eyed girl squinted at the light and made out Ally's blurry face. "Al I'm tired." Ally looked at her watch. "It's 10pm Lo, we won't be long, plus there's no shows on tomorrow so we can all rest up all day." Lauren eyed her cautiously "We have no interviews?" Ally shook her head. "Nothing at all, I checked this evening with our manager." Lauren conceded and threw the blanket off her body that Camila had so nicely given her, come to think of it, where was Camila? "Camila isn't here.." Lauren said looking around for the brunette. "Mila said she wasn't feeling too good." Dinah pouted and Lauren pouted back. "I'll fix it, wait up. I'll meet you outside." The 3 girls gave Lauren a thumbs up and waited for her and hopefully Camila. "Camz, come on we're going for food!" Camila pushed back her curtain and looked at Lauren with a pained expression. "What's the matter Camzi?" Lauren's voice softened and she stroked the hair from Camila's face. "My head, and my stomach. They hurt. I don't feel too good Lolo." Camila said softly. "Aw, why are you talking so quietly?" Camila closed her eyes under Lauren's gentle hand stroking her hot cheek. "Cause I feel like my head will explode if I speak any louder." Lauren frowned and stroked her eyebrow, she kissed it and leaned back. "Wait here." Lauren smiled sympathetically and met the girls outside. "Hey, I'm gonna rest up here and take care of Camila, can you just bring us both something back? I'll give you guys the money. Oh! Can you get a hot water bottle and an ice pack on your way back?" Lauren asked and Normani nodded. "Sure, look after Mila for us. We'll try not to be long." Lauren smiled and went back in the bus. "Camz, I'm gonna stick around to take care of you, okay?" Lauren spoke in a soft voice, remembering Camila's headache. Camila nodded with a small smile on her face, but the pain was still showing in her eyes. "Get some rest. I'll be here." Camila mumbled something inaudible so Lauren asked her to repeat it, "I asked if you could keep stroking my cheek like that, I'm so hot and your hands are perfectly cold." Lauren gave her a gentle nod. "I think you're getting sick babe." Camila didn't even have the energy to groan in protest so she just let it slide in acknowledgement. Lauren was sat cross legged on the floor, glad that Camila's bunk was on the bottom row so she could sit and watch her. "I can't fall asleep Lo, it hurts too much." Camila whimpered, Lauren sighed and signalled for her to wait before coming back with a thermometer. "Open your mouth." Camila obeyed weakly and let Lauren put the thermometer in before she kept her lips tightly shut. When it beeped, Lauren took it out and frowned at it. "You have got some temperature Camz. Lemme grab some medicine to bring that down." Lauren went back to the kitchen area and got some medicine for Camila and a banana to eat with it. "Take that, and then eat this." Lauren handed her the tablets and a glass of water. Camila rolled onto her back and say up limply, putting the glass to her lips and swallowing the tablets. "Good, now eat your banana." Camila sighed, "I don't want it, my stomach hurts too bad Lauren." Lauren felt bad to push it but she had to for Camila's health. "You have to eat with the medicine Camila, just take a couple of bites." Camila was too tired to protest and laid down once she had a couple of bites of the banana. "I hate being sick." Lauren smiled sadly at her best friend. "I know Camzi, but that's why Doctor Jauregui is here, to help you get better." Camila smiled at her attempt to make her feel better, if the medicine wasn't working she was sure Lauren's smile would. "You're so weird." Camila smiled, Lauren stuck her tongue out. "You can't talk Miss banana's and spaghetti." Camila held her stomach. "Don't Lauren I feel sick." Lauren shut up and lifted Camila's top. "What are you doing?" Camila gulped "I'm gonna rub your tummy." Lauren said innocently, Camila felt her heart melt at the cute way she'd said it. "Be gentle." She requested and Lauren gave a small nod of understanding. "Wait," Lauren got up and crawled over Camila so she was spooning her. "It's easier to do it this way." Lauren mumbled as she rested her head on Camila's shoulder. "But I don't want you to get sick Lolo." Camila complained, but she couldn't deny she loved this position. "I don't even care about getting sick right now, I don't get sick often." Camila huffed "I don't either, but hey, look at me now." Lauren giggled. "Hush now Camz, you need to get some rest." Camila nodded, focusing on Lauren's ever so gentle circular hand motions on her stomach. Lauren's hands were perfectly cold for Camila's hot body. "You're one of the most amazing best friends Lauren." Camila said out of nowhere, Lauren smiled at Camila even though the girls eyes were shut. "I do these things because you're special to me, like I am to you. Like we both said, I'll always love you Camzi.." Camila's eyes opened to meet Lauren's loving gaze. "What do you mean Laur?" Lauren stared into the brown pools of deep adoration. "I mean that we have a really special connection Camila, and I don't think it could ever be broken, no matter what shit happens between us." Camila listened closely. "Dinah has my heart now, and I'm happy to give it to her, but always remember a part of it belongs to you, Camila. I'm still yours." Lauren admitted, Camila felt a lump forming in her throat. She wanted to kiss her, Camila really wanted to kiss Lauren. But Lauren had Dinah, it just wouldn't be fair. They had made their promises and they couldn't break them. Could they? "I want to kiss you so bad." Camila whispered almost inaudibly. "I wish I didn't have to stop you..but you still broke my heart Camz..and I wish I could forget that, but I can't." Camila's eyes brimmed with tears, but she still couldn't tear her eyes away from the green ones staring into her soul. "Yeah, I know. But Lauren I still never meant to hurt you..you must know that." She said with her voice thick. Lauren licked her lips before she spoke, and that only made Camila's urge rise. "I know, but it happened for a reason right?" Camila regretfully nodded. "But we'd be good together, don't you think?" Lauren gave a soft smile before answering. "Maybe in another life Camz." Camila bit her lip, debating whether to ask what she wanted. "Whatever you want to say you might as well say it, while we're pouring our hearts out." Camila laughed nervously, "I just..God I really want to kiss you." Lauren took a deep breath and nodded. "Does it count as me cheating, if it's a kiss goodbye?" Lauren asked hesitantly, Camila really wanted to say no, it didn't count. But the truth was yes, it did count. But in a flash before they both registered what was happening, Camila had put her lips on Lauren's delicately and Lauren laid there frozen. She found herself wanting to kiss Camila back, and the butterflies were back just like the first time they'd kissed. But Lauren couldn't do that to Dinah, but she realised that she could when she found herself kissing her back. "Goodbye..Lauren." Camila whispered sadly as she gazed into her eyes longingly, Lauren swallowed the lump in her throat and tears welled in her eyes. "I don't want to say goodbye." Lauren whispered, Camila knew it wasn't right, but she wanted to be selfish, she didn't care about anything else in the moment. "Then don't."

A/N
Oooooooooh make or break. Camren or Laurinah? Comment what you'd prefer, then wait and see ;)