Broken, Honest, Beautiful

Fix You

"Still can't sleep?" Dinah asked gently as she stroked her girlfriend's cheek, kneeling beside her. Lauren sighed and shook her head. "Why won't you talk to me? To anyone? You've not said a word since we made up. You're not still mad are you?" Dinah asked her worriedly. Lauren shook her head reassuringly and turned to lie on her back on the couch. "Can I help you at all?" Dinah asked and Lauren shook her head. "'No it's just something that's going to happen. There's no stopping it Dinah." Lauren sighed. "Lauren do you need a break from tour again?" Camila asked warmly. "No Camz I just need to be left to myself." "Cause that worked so well for you last time didn't it." Normani mumbled. "Mans.." Dinah shook her head subtly. "Mani, don't, come over here." Lauren said, now moving to sit up. Normani shuffled closer on the couch. "You know, listen, sometimes silence and a little space gives you a new perspective. I think that's what I need, not a break, and not being fussed over. Space, that's it." "But does space mean we can't cuddle you anymore? I really miss Lauren hugs." Ally pouted miserably. "Really?" Lauren asked, Ally didn't tend to admit she wanted a hug. "You never said. C'mere lil nugget." Lauren held out her arms and Ally sat in her lap and cuddled her friend. "We don't mind giving you some space if it's what you need Lauren, that's absolutely fine. But just make sure you don't push us away in the process, okay?" Camila reminded her. "Sure." Lauren agreed as she ran her fingers through Ally's hair. She was more focused on the older girl sat in her arms. Something was on her mind and had been for a few days, she could tell by the way she was acting. "I think we should get a takeaway, how's Thai food?" Dinah clapped her hands together to get their attention. "Sounds good." Camila agreed as she got up. "I uh..I'll go too." Normani said, picking up 'Alren' wanted some alone time. "Thanks Mani." Ally smiled and Lauren smiled down at her reassuringly. "You wanna tell me what's going on babe?" Ally looked up at her with furrowed eyebrows. "With what?" "With you." Lauren pressed. "I don't know what you mean, I'm okay." "Please don't lie Ally, you've not been yourself these past few days. What's the matter?" "I don't know I'm just homesick, like my mom is just," Lauren rubbed her back as she paused. "She's going through so much pain now and I can't be there for her." Lauren handed the girl a tissue. "She's got people around her to help her, and Ally she was the one who got you here, she wants you to live your dreams rather than take care of her at home-" "But-" "I know you want to take care of your mom more than anything else but she's independent and she's so strong, like you. She'd want you to be out here with us doing this babe, this makes you happy and she wants you to be happy. " Lauren smiled and gently wiped her friend's eyes. "Your mom would also want you to stop crying, as do I." Ally laughed at her weakly. "So take a deep breath in," Lauren instructed and Ally did making Lauren smile. "Now exhale." Ally let her breath go and looked at her friend thankfully. "How do you feel babe?" "Better." Ally confirmed. "Good, now call your mom and talk to her for a little bit. Go on." Lauren helped the girl up and Ally got her phone and smiled at the green eyed girl. "Thank you Lauren." Lauren smiled and nodded, she didn't need to say anything. Ally went to her bunk for some privacy while Lauren decided to go out for a walk. "Hey Laurenza." Her best friend smiled as she hurried over to her and pulled her into her side as they walked. "Hi Mani." Lauren smiled forcefully. "What's up?" Normani asked turning serious in an instant. "I'm just tired, I didn't get much sleep." "Well we have rehearsals in a couple of hours Lo, will you be okay?" Lauren shrugged, she felt like she was going to pass out if that was any indication. "You do look pale, do you need to skip?" Normani offered. "No no it's fine." Lauren said in a raspy, cracking voice. "Are you sure? I can talk to Sean for-" "I said it's fine!" Lauren snapped, pushing herself away from Normani. "Fine." Normani said in a short voice and turned to leave. "I'm going back to the bus, I'll go ahead and give you your space." "Mani don't be-" "Be like what Lauren?" Lauren looked down. "I don't mean to push you away I just-" "You just think you can handle it all by yourself and that you don't need any help because you're Lauren fucking Jauregui and you can do anything you want, why can't you freaking accept the face that you need help Lauren?!" The dark skinned girl shouted at her friend. Lauren flinched back at the loudness of her tone and her eyes instantly became tear filled. "Wait Lauren, hold on, I'm sorry-" Normani apologised, ready for Lauren to end up running away from her again. "No, no you're right." Lauren said making Normani stop. "Oh, well in that case, what can I do to help?" Her best friend asked gently as she walked towards her again. Lauren opened her arms and looked at her sadly, Normani pulled her best friend into a hug and held her head against her chest. "We're cute." She smirked. "Be quiet." Lauren shushed her. "Rude-" "No no seriously Mani, listen." Normani kept her mouth shut and then she heard it. "Who's out here?" Normani called nervously. The Latina pulled out of her grip to look for the source of the noise and jumped in shock when she felt a fair weight on her back. "Hi Lauren!" The person grinned. "Bea!" Lauren grinned and pulled her mini me into a hug. "Hi babe, aw look at you gorgeous, you're gettin' so big!" Bea smiled widely and punched her arm playfully. "As if, Maniiii!" Bea held her arms open, Normani hugged the old friend and grinned. "How are you?" "I'm good, I'm really good." "Jacob?" Lauren nudged her arm. "He's great. What are you guys doing tomorrow?" She asked excitedly. "We have a bunch of interviews all day." Normani pouted. "Dang it, it's my day off before I leave for San Antonio and I was hoping I'd get to see you guys." "Sorry munchkin. Maybe we can meet you for lunch?" "If you have time, I'd love to." Bea smiled. "Great-" Lauren started but Normani checked the time and pulled on her arm. "Laur we have to go to rehearsals. We need to go get ready and then grab the other girls." "Dang it." Lauren said with a sad pout. Bea kissed Lauren's cheek and nodded to Normani. "We'll see you tomorrow, hopefully." Normani smiled. Bea nodded and pulled her into a bear hug. "Laters!" Bea waved and skipped off back to her boyfriend in the studio where she'd come from about a block away. "You've nearly got it Ally, you're doing good, just try again, like this." Lauren stood leaning against a wall while she watched Sean help Ally, taking a swig from her water bottle. "Hey," Dinah panted as she tapped her girlfriend's shoulder, gulping down her water. "It's a hard workout today." The Polynesian gasped as she finished her bottle. "Yeah, I know. It's exhausting huh." Lauren agreed with Dinah as she mindlessly chewed on the cap. "I'm on a time out, I nearly fell on top of Mani." Dinah laughed making Lauren giggle. "Kiss." Lauren pouted her lips, Dinah kissed them quickly and pulled away as soon as she leaned in. "I'm all sweaty, lemme wash my face. I'll be back." She excused herself and Lauren nodded. "I am never gonna get this." Ally groaned. Lauren sighed and went over to the girl struggling with the dance move. "Here, let me help you." Sean smiled gratefully and let Lauren take over while he went over to Normani to run over some new choreography ideas she had. "Hold my hips." Lauren said as as see took Ally's hands, placing them on her hips. "You drop down and do this," Lauren said as Ally moved with her. "You see?" Ally let go and tried again, getting it first time. "You got it. Sean! Play from the second verse!" Lauren called, he held a thumbs up and hit play. While their new sound system blasted out the music, Lauren watched the girl proudly as she did the move with ease. "You're really helping me out today." Ally laughed. "Anything for you." Lauren smiled and walked off to where Dinah was waiting. "Now we can kiss." She said in a baby voice, the Latina pecked her lips thoughtlessly. "I need some air." Dinah frowned. "Can I come too?" She expected Lauren to say no, but much to her surprise, she didn't reject the idea. "Sure D." Dinah jumped up a little too eagerly and followed her girlfriend outside. "Are you okay?" "I'm tired." Lauren mumbled as she cuddled into Dinah's side voluntarily. "I know." Dinah pouted as she wrapped her arms around her. "Dinah?" "Mm?" "I love you." Dinah blushed and buried her face in Lauren's hair. "I love you too." "I literally feel like I'm gonna fall asleep right now." Lauren mumbled. "Go to sleep, I'll take you back to the bus while we rehearse." "But we should all do it-" Lauren cut herself off with a yawn. "Uh huh, you're too tired princess. Back to the bus for you babygirl." Dinah said as she picked the girl up in her arms and Lauren clung onto her girlfriend like a monkey. "I'm taking Lo back to the bus, she's tired." Dinah said and Camila and Normani looked up. "I'll say." Normani giggled. "Cheechee she's already asleep, her head is on your shoulder and she's wiped out." Dinah smiled and giggled softly. "I'll be back in a bit." "Okay, see you in a little while. We're on a break, in fact we finish in just under an hour, you can stay with Lauren if you want, by the time you get back here we'll be finished won't we?" Normani asked the Cuban next to her who nodded. "Yeah, we're cool here, just stay with Lauren." Camila agreed. "Okay, if you're sure?" "We are sure D, go." Normani nodded with a small smile as she admired her sleeping best friend. "Thanks guys." Dinah smiled and carried her friend to the car where their driver was waiting. "Back to the bus Dinah Jane?" "That'd be great. Thanks." Dinah confirmed. "I can wake you when we get there, go to sleep like Lauren." Dinah nodded and let her head fall on Lauren's shoulder as she sat her in her lap, pulling the seatbelt over them both. Lauren let out a small, contented sigh in her sleep and nuzzled her head further into Dinah's neck, Dinah smiled at the unconscious action. "Sweet dreams beautiful girl."