Tragic Magic (Ronnie Radke Love Story) [Book 2-sequel to The Drug In Me]

82. New Places

**** I really am sorry guys! Please don't hate me, at least not too much ****

When I woke up, the train was pulling into a station, loud screeching painfully jabbing at my ear drums as the train squealed to a stop.

I stood up and shuffled down the aisle, making my way to the door, stepping out and quickly running to the ticket window, trying not to get lost in the great moving sea of people.

"Is this Bishop?" I asked the man, yelling so he could hear me.

"Yes, this here's Bishop California. Where ya looking to go?" he asked me, leaning over and speaking through the little arc at the bottom so he wasn't talking through the glass.

"I'd like to get as near to Las Vegas as I can please" I said, and he nodded, clicking on a machine and holding out a ticket stub. I gave him the money and grabbed it, zipping it in my pants pocket and then stumbling to sit down on a bench.

I was haunted by Ronnie's face. The anger, the hurt, betrayed look. I felt horrible; I couldn't get it out of my head.

It was burned into my mind, a never ending echo that I was a horrible person.

His eyes, the sadness glinting behind the anger. His lips, the scowl falling into a frown. His eyebrows, angry furrow giving way to upturned pain.

I felt like the worst human being ever. I was the worst person in the world.

Maybe I was even worse than Craig!

I betrayed Ronnie, I lied to him, I fucking stole from him! How could I live with myself?!! I was disgusting, repulsive, horrid.

I couldn't forget his words....never.

'I never want to see you again'

'Don't touch me'

'I never want to see you again'...

Never again?!

Ronnie hated me, and I would never see him again, never see B.Lay, never see Charlie, or anyone.

Never see Luna, or Echo!

My heart hurt. My head hurt. My body hurt. Everything hurt at this realization. Every part of my life before now, would never again be a part of my life.

As soon as the train pulled in I ran on, showing the ticket collector my ticket before running to the bathroom.

I needed to inject, and fast. I needed to forget, forget everything. Forget Ronnie, forget Charlie, forget Luna, forget Echo, forget myself.

I slammed the needle into my arm, pushing it into my vein and injecting fast, trembling.

I stumbled around, throwing up in the stall before leaving the bathroom. I sat down in the back, away from everyone else and drew my knees up to my chest, laying my head on top of them and closing my eyes.

I woke up a few hours later and watched the world pass me by until the train stopped.

Now for the hard part - finding someone to take me into Vegas without being kidnapped or raped.

I shuddered and looked around, trying to find someone who looked like they weren't too scary and might be headed to Vegas.

There was a group of 3 ladies in tight dresses with big suitcases and beads around their necks. They looked like maybe they were on a bachelorette trip - the blonde one had a big shiny ring on.

And there was a group of men in business suits with sleezy smirks looking to be heading to Vegas too. But they reminded me too much of Mr. Cryle and John.....

The 3 ladies it is.

I walked up to them, trying to look meek and helpless. "Excuse me, but are you heading to Las Vegas?" I asked, looking up at them pleadingly.

Please don't turn me away, please don't turn me away....

The blonde one - the bride-to-be, looked at me and nodded. "Yes we are, why?" she said, raising a perfectly sculpted eyebrow. I looked down and bit my lip before peeking up at her.

By now all 3 had turned to me, and I felt intimidated by their tall heels and expensive-looking dresses.

"I was just wondering if maybe I could catch a ride with you into Vegas? I'd be off your hands as soon as I got there, I promise, I only need a ride in!" I said quickly, looking up at them in bleak desperation.

They looked to each other before smiling at me.

"Aw what the hell, why not? This is a bachelorette party after all, lets get crazy!" the blonde said, throwing her fist in the air.

I smiled wide and thanked them continously, nodding my head to them gratefully.

"Sure, lets get a move on then! Don't want to be late!" the blonde said, and I followed after them quickly, scurrying behind them.

Fuck, that went pretty well actually...

I got in the rental car with them and sat in the back, my bag in my lap. I was quiet as they chatted to each other excitedly, laying my head back on the head rest and closing my eyes.

It had been a few hours in the car, and I was just itching for a fix, regretting not injecting before I got off the bus. Damn, now if have to wait until I find a place in Vegas....

Finally, after hours of listening to the ladies talking about nail polish wedding gowns, and how big the male strippers dicks should be, they finally pulled up in front of a hotel. I scrambled out of the car, hoisting my bag across my shoulder, yelling a thank you to the ladies as I ran away.

I ran into the hotel, searching for a bathroom and locking myself in a stall, quickly preparing the heroin and injecting it quickly, leaning my head back against the stall and sighing.

I walked out of the hotel and walked the streets, sighing and looking around for something that could give me a hint as to what to do next.

Get a job? I would need money, but what could I do? I wouldn't prostitute myself; I wasn't that desperate.....

Not yet....

No! I won't do that...

So then where would I go?

What would I do?

I had no idea.... I had no idea of anything anymore.