Choose // ChildDolphin FF [complete]

42 - memories

*Octavia's POV*

2 days later

I've tried calling and texting Ryan, he hasn't answered to anything.

Even Bee tried contacting him, nothing worked.

Now, I was worrying.

What if he does something to himself?

Bee was out getting groceries for me since I didn't have a energy to, even though I was sleeping every day for about 10 hours.

Sleep was my only current escape.

I needed to get out of this apartment, so I put on a sweatshirt and leggings and grabbed my phone and headphones.

I walked out of my apartment and locked it behind me. I texted Bee letting her know where I was.

I walked down the hallway, took a left, continued down that hallway to the elevator and got down to the main floor.

I walked out of the apartment complex and was greeted by the busy outside world.

Taxis, people walking furiously fast through crowds of other people, joggers, it was crazy.

And here I was, the depressed, lonely fuck up girl.

I pulled up Jordan's playlist on Spotify and let the music fill my ears as I ignored the people surrounding me.

I saw a little corner coffee shop and the memories of Ryan and I getting coffee there every couple of mornings rushed into my mind.

My mind continued to think of Ryan.

When will I explain to him?

Will he ever trust me again?

A thousand similar thoughts came through my head and my mind drifted off somewhere else, not realizing where I was walking to.

I snap out of my daze, and lookup up to see I had walked to Ryan's house.

It was empty. No cars, no people, nothing.

How did I walk this far?

My eyes start tearing up as I got closer to his house, even more memories coming back to me.

I reach his door and slide my back down it and sit against it on the ground. I bring my knees to my chest and bury my face in them.

An hour or so passes, and this whole time I was just sitting here, in front of Ryan's house, balling my eyes out.

I hear footsteps crunching on leaves, and I don't even want to look at who it is.

The person gets so close to me that they're standing right in front of me, still not saying anything.

"Excuse me, but I need to get inside my house."

Yup, he hates me. Ryan hates me.

I look up, my eyes still wet with tears probably looking red and stressed.

He turns and looks away.

"You know I can't stand seeing you cry."

I get up off the gravel ground and turn him back to face me.

"Can I explain?" I say pulling my hand off his shoulder once I realize it was still there.

"What's there to explain?" He says back with attitude.

"A shit ton."

He sighs and holds the door open for me to walk in his house. He follows closely behind me.

We were sitting in silence for a couple of minutes before he spoke up.

"You said you would never do what the other girls did, and you did anyways."

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