Slap Post: What I Hate

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"Okay," Jade shrugs, "this is like, I don't know, episode 27 or whatever of me talking about stuff I hate." She takes a swig of her drink, before looking back at the camera. 

"This isn't like a show, so don't go thinking 'Oh! It's a like a show right'" she says in a mocking tone, putting her drink down on the table beside her. "No. These are segments.. I guess which I have appropriately named What I Hate. Look, I made a sign." She leans down, grabbing the cardboard sign that leaned against her chair. 

"See that? We seeing the theme here?" She smiles fakely, "Fantastic

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"See that? We seeing the theme here?" She smiles fakely, "Fantastic..." She mutters, putting the sign down. She glances at the floor, messing with her hair, "I hate people who says 'supposebly', the word is 'supposedly' alright? It's suppos-ed-ly so if you're one of those people who goes around saying supposebly when you should be saying supposedly, I probably hate you." 

"And what about those genius' who say fuhstrayted!" She says, cutting a yellow Gerba Daisy

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"And what about those genius' who say fuhstrayted!" She says, cutting a yellow Gerba Daisy. "Oh, I'm so fuhstrayted!' The word is frustrated, okay jersey boys? Seriously if you go around saying 'Oh man, you wouldn't believe her, she really fuhstraytes me!' Then you deserved to be frustrated because you're a walking idiot. Kay?" She smiles, cutting down the stem of the flower.  "Kay."

"I hate people, who put ketchup on hotdogs

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"I hate people, who put ketchup on hotdogs. I-i swear that makes me just-- It's like.. the hatred I feel--" She closes her eyes, wincing angrily. 

She shakes her head, pointing at the camera. "Girls who wear skirts over their jeans. What do I feel when I see that? Here's a hint, hatred! You listening girls? Wear a skirt or jeans, but if you wear them simultaneously, whatever go for it!" She laughs, "As long as you don't mind me HATING YOU."

"I hate it when I go to someone's house and their dog jumps all over me and the owner says 'Oh, it's okay! He's friendly' Guess what?" She whispers, "I'm not

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"I hate it when I go to someone's house and their dog jumps all over me and the owner says 'Oh, it's okay! He's friendly' Guess what?" She whispers, "I'm not. Get your dog off me." She sneered before glancing at the wall.

Jade points at the camera, leaning back in her chair. "When I'm at a restaurant, like finishing my dinner and the waiter brings me my dessert before he clears the dirty dinner dishes, I hate that... When I'm about to eat a piece of cake, I don't wanna stare at the bones of the dead chicken I just ate." She shakes her head, "Fair enough? Yeah."

"I hate when people complain when I chew ice," she says, mouth full of ice

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"I hate when people complain when I chew ice," she says, mouth full of ice. "Does this bug you?" She asks, chewing on the ice loudly. "Good."

Rolling her eyes, she places the glass of ice on her table before looking back at the camera. "And now," She leans down, "I'm going to turn off the camera, using a remote and the powers of my hands."

*Click*

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