thirteen

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• Will's POV •

Maybe it was the alcohol. Maybe it was the way Jordan's skin glowed next to the fire. Maybe it was the way his lips moved when he said my name. Whatever it was, I didn't pull away when he kissed me. His lips tasted like cheap beer. I'm not gay. Then why am I kissing Jordan? He pulled away and looked at me, his green eyes staring straight through me. His cheeks were pink and he looked down at his lap, a small smile on his lips. We sat in silence.

"I'm sorry," he finally said. He wouldn't look at me. "Come in, you can sleep here tonight and drive home in the morning once you're sober," he added. My heart was racing and my lips were tingling. I wanted nothing more than to stay here tonight.

"Okay," I said simply, taking my keys out of the ignition. Why does Jordan make me feel this way? I hated him a day ago. What changed? He got out of the car and I followed him.

"Won't your parents be mad if they find out we were drinking?" I whispered, climbing up the stairs in his house. It was dark but it felt nice; secure.

"My parents aren't home," he said. I could see his smile in the dark. I admired him as I walked behind him. "This is it," he said, motioning around his room and flicking on his light switch.

"It's nice," I said once my eyes got adjusted to the light.

"Thanks," he responded, tossing me a pair of pants. I gave him a look of confusion and he laughed. "To sleep in,"

"Oh," I said. "Thank you,"

"Mhm," he hummed, grabbing some clothes for himself.

"A shirt?" I asked and he tossed me one.

"Thank you," I said again. It made Jordan laugh. I lingered in his room for a few seconds before walking into his bathroom to change. Jordan's clothes fit surprisingly well. I walked back into his room to see him already lying in bed. He saw me and lifted the covers from one side, patting the bed. My heart was already racing and I hesitated.

"You can sleep downstairs if you want to," he said.

"This is fine," I managed to say, walking over and climbing into bed. Jordan wasn't wearing a shirt and I let out a little gasp.

"Sorry," he said quietly, not breaking eye contact. I smiled at him to try to hide how awkward it was.

"It's fine," I said, pulling the blanket over me. I could feel Jordan's eyes on me the entire time.

"The clothes fit okay?" He asked. I nodded, glancing away from his gaze. I couldn't look him in the eyes without wanting to kiss him again. You're not gay, I told myself. But then I did meet Jordan's gaze. He was close to me; so close to me. I leaned in slowly and kissed Jordan again, expecting him to pull away. But he didn't. His lips moved with mine, slowly and carefully. If liking Jordan makes me gay, I guess I'm gay.

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