50 dates in 50 states (raura)

Something missing in Mississippi

Hey guys! I literally feel so freaking awful that this story has not been updated! I have been really busy but I know I owe you guys an apology especially if any one still even reads this, so to those who do: enjoy😀 and I'm sorry!
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Laura's Pov

"You don't know your beautiful!" Taylor and I sang in the car as she drove and I accompanied her in the passenger seat on our way to Mississippi to show Ross he only screwed himself by messing with my feelings.

Although I still am pretty heartbroken,
I can't get him out of my mind. What bothers me the most is that He never even chased after me to explain things, that's what really hit hard. It's like he didn't care enough to provide and explanation, he just went with things. Maybe his mindset was in a different place:

Did he really mean it when he said he liked me and wanted to be more than friends?

Did he enjoy our time together or did he just want me around so he could
Kiss me or better yet try to get in my pants?

It was these types of questions that kept a strong anticipation in my head,
I just can't get him out of my mind, but I'm sure I'm out of his, he's probably kissing some other girl which sucks for me but I'm not letting him know that I need him and want to be with him,
Even after the countless times he's F'd
Up.

"You ok?" Taylor asked me, drawing me away from my assumptions of what Ross is currently doing.

"Um yea" I said shrugging

"No your not, what's wrong L?" Taylor asked concerned, lowering the music in the car

"I miss him" I pleaded, knowing I could trust Taylor to comfort and offer me a piece of advice

"I know, but you'll get over it, I did"

"What do you mean?" I asked

"It's a long story" she sighed

"I have all the time in the world" I told Taylor.

"Well for starters you know how Ross and I danced at the same studio,
For years and years.... Well our teacher paired us up for a duet during my freshman year, two years ago. It was a lyrical routine containing many lifts and turns but anyways during rehearsal one day Ross dropped me during the last 8 count, on our last lift and I fell, crashing my head against the hard laminate floor. Luckily I didn't break anything , I did however get a concussion and Ross, as my dance partner and best friend was worried so he picked me up, took me to the hospital and stayed with me over night. When I woke up Ross was sitting on the edge of my bed eagerly....
The doctors said the concussion was minor and I could go home but I had to rest for at least three weeks. Everyday Ross came over to my house bringing me flowers and treats to eat, it was really sweet and he kept telling me how much he missed me at dance. Eventually three weeks passed and I had no signs of further injury so I returned to practice ready to practice our routine. We practiced, running through the sections until the ending came and I hesitated, fearful I would
Fall. Ross told me we can change that part so he added in a dip, then he pulled in kissing me passionately. That day felt magical and it was my first kiss, not sure if it was his but it was one of the best days of my life...  He asked me out and of course I said yes... We dated for a short amount of time but then Ross changed.
He started avoiding me, he started missing practice and then he moved, sending me a text that he's moving and it would be hard to have a relationship, given the fact we both live miles apart.
I told him I felt betrayed, I was furious he never spent time with me, only when it was convenient for him and he said he like being friends so that's where it ended." Taylor said taking a large breath

"Oh my gosh, I had no idea, so do you still like him?" I asked with a Hint of curiosity but a vast amount of jealously

"No no no no! I didn't kiss him, he kissed me, I like another guy at my school." She said with a long pause. "but the real question is, do YOU still like him"

"Um I don't know" I said lying

"What don't you know? I know you can't stop thinking about him Laura! Tell me what you do like about him, and what you don't"

"Well I don't like him toying with my emotions, telling me he wants me to commit to a relationship but then he can't" I explained

"So why do you want a relationship, with him?"

"I love his personality, most of the time.
He is usually caring, and sweet. I love when we lay on ground, both of us wearing shorts and we tangle our legs together, I feel sparks that I have never felt before. I also love how passionate he is for music, He really gets into to it and that's awesome. Also, he is a really good kisser, I mean I've only kissed him but it's very pleasurable ;). Also he always asks me what I want to do when we go places, Always placing me before himself which is a great trait."

"I think somebody loves Ross... And when you like someone that much you can't just let them go, I know he screwed up Laura but isn't your heart aching for more from absence?" Taylor asked as we arrived to our exit waiting for an answer

"I don't know, I do miss him, but do you really think what we have is love? we're just a bunch of teenagers, to ignorant and dumb to know when somethings or someone's good or bad. I just wish there was some kind of sign to help me because-" I said as my ringing phone cut me off.
"It's Ross" I told Taylor

"Pick it up" she said whispering

"Hello?" I said

"Oh um Hi L-Laura there's something I gotta tell you" he stuttered trying to say the words he couldn't quite spell out

"Yea?" I asked

"I know I've been a jerk but thing is that I still really miss you badly. I know I screwed up major but I had no intention of hurting you and somehow I always manage to hurt you. Its always the beautiful, funny, smart, talented   girls that get hurt. It's just when I'm around you I can't control myself, I love being in your presence and being the one to hold your hand, or open the doors or buy you food and you tell me
It's just lunch but I so wanted it to be date and even tell my friends it was a date even though it wasn't to you. Are you mad at me?" He asked shyly

"Well yea I'm mad, you toy with my heart like I'm doll, like you know I'm broken and you think adding glue will repair me long term even though the glue constantly wears away, revealing the broken pieces once again, creating This evil cycle that repeats itself." I started takin a long pause before my next sentence.
"On the other hand when I am glued together and when we are functional we are a well oiled machine, an inseparable duo, a force to be weakened with." I stated

"Wow Laura, your lyrics are incredible, I miss you so freaking much I just wish that we could-" Ross started but then my phone died, along with our conversation and my feelings of hate toward him demolished.

From that point on I realized I could never forgive Ross because I could never stay mad at Ross. And this was one of a million examples to prove it.

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Hey guys! Here's a quick update, maybe part 2 will be our tomorrow! I hope so!

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~Tika 😎