I got home too late that night and all i wanted to do was to burn my cabin. I know no matter what i do, he stays here always. He'll always be around. I've got a short time but a million memories with him and i couldnt help but break down.
I look around and there were no changes. He did not take his things with him which is painfully heartbreaking. He left something behind. He left parts of him. His memories.
I held his phone and unlock. Looking through our pictures together made me want to just go chase him down and be back into my arms but no, i cant do that. He has his own life to live and i feel like I've been taken away much of his time instead of spending it with his family.
I keep tossing on my bed as i try to sleep and my thoughts were haunting me. His face kept flashing through my mind everytime i close my eyes. Also, i felt so empty. He has taken away my all with him. My soul, my mind, my body, and my heart. But i'll live. At least, i'll try.
The sun was out and i havent gotten enough sleep but i have to move. I held my comforter and then pain constricted to my body and then i felt that im gonna throw up. I clasped my mouth with my hand and went to the bathroom and puke my guts out on the bowl holding up my hair.
"Uhh. This is disgusting!"
I took a shower straight and headed to work. I think Kaylah will be around today.
I took my bike and went around for awhile before going to the café.
"Hello po Miss Julie," a staff greeted me and i answered a smile. I went to change my clothes and then started working around. Few minutes passed, Kay and Kev got in.
"How's the best friend?" she kissed me on my cheeks after i said hi, and Kev hugged me.
"Good. You?"
"Better," she smiled meaningfully.
She helped me fixed the centerpieces and all before sitting down.
"Juls, lets have brunch!" she called me in.
"Im not so hungry. Plus im sure im gonna vomit again later if i had intake now," i told her and her brows met.
What again?
Ugh.
"Vomit? Are you sick?" She asked. Now she caught that.
"No. It just felt so weird that i...." i was about to say something more when Kev's phone rung.
"Hello?" He answered his phone quietly.
"Wait! Oh man! You're finally home? Alright. Alright. Now relax. Meet me at dinner. God, Elmo Moses Magalona! What the hell happened to you?" he was then talking a little loud happily and my heart reacted when he mentioned his name. I was trying not to think (and say) about his name anymore.
He is finally home. And im happy for him.
I sighed as i sat back down.
How could i even tell Kevin about me and his bestfriend?
"Excuse me for a moment," i excused myself and went to Kay's room.
I effortlessly land myself on the mini couch and my eyes suddenly closed. I feel so dizzy. And sleepy.
"Hey!" She tapped my shoulders.
I slowly open my lids and look at Kay.
"Hey. Go and eat. Im a little tired," i told her in an almost a whisper.
"No. Julie Anne, tell me the truth. Are you okay or not?" She asked in an irritated but at the same time scared tone of voice.
I shrugged as i started confusing myself.
"I dont know, Kay. My body is getting so weird. Last week, i couldnt eat properly. Last night and this morning i was throwing up. Now my sense of smell is fucking me up. I dont know what's wrong. Am i about to die?" I held my forehead as i lay down again.
"This bitch. Are you trying to.... "
"Kay, you smell so bad! Get out!" I pinched my nose after talking and i saw her eyes widened.
"Julie! Im wearing your favorite Gucci scent. What's wrong with you?" she half yelled.
Oh yeah?
"Wait a minute!!! Julie!!!!" she stared at me in horror as she paused for a moment.
"What?"
And then that hits me.
First, when i was still with him, i started complaining about his cooking. About the taste of the food.
And then i was too moody and horny whenever he was around. Oh God.
I started vomiting last night and this morning. God! Morning sickness!
Now my sense of smell is making a scene and its getting too sensitive.
"Did you have a one night stand with someone when i was busy?" she asked with her arms closed?
"What?" I shouted.
"Of course not, Kay. But i dont know. When our bar date was cancelled before, i went to the club alone and drink til i dropped. I cant remember what happened next but i knew i danced with any guys," and then i had to lie. It's better to put it that way rather than tell her that i was with her boyfriend's bestfriend.
"Fuck. How is that? What are we gonna do?" She asked.
"What do you mean?"
"Juls, i think you're pregnant." she whispered and i almost froze.
I rubbed my belly and a smile formed on my lips.
My tears streaming down my face.
"Hey, are you okay? Dont cry. Were still not sure about it," she hugged me.
"Kaylah, i wanted this. If i am pregnant, im gonna be the happiest! I think i am pregnant," i held my stomach and then looked at Kay who is now also in tears. She came to hugged me tighter as we both cry.
"Let's go to the OB GYNE tomorrow. I'll book you tonight. Do you want me to stay in your cabin for days or so?" she wiped her tears and then mine as we pulled away.
I shook my head in disagreement.
"Im fine, Kay."
"Are you sure?"
"Yes."
"Okay. Im gonna ask my assistant to bring PT here and check it tomorrow," she murmured and i nodded.
"Thank you," i smiled with my tears shining in my eyes. She smiled at me and breathe with me as we held hands.
"Kay, i wish i am pregnant," i held her hand tighter and she nodded.
"I wish too so you dont have to adopt or something," we chuckled.
"What will you name our baby if the gender is boy?" she asked excitedly.
"I dont know yet. But Kay.... It felt like... It felt like a she."
