Since everyone was fighting who to carry my child first, i ended up getting her and wrapped her around me as she snuggled on the crook of my neck. The three of them pouted and that made me laugh so hard.
"Nak, baka pwede sa amin din naman muna si Mielle," Tita Terry and Tita Mila pleaded and i know i cant resist them. Im just so thankful i have them with me to take care of my baby.
"Hey love," i looked at Mielle's eyes, brown eyes, like his, and then smiled,
"Go to Grannys. Mommy will be here watching you," and as if she understood, she looked at my Titas and suddenly open her arms to them and they all happily take her.
I looked around the house and Kay was nowhere. This is very unusual.
"Nay, si Kaylah po napansin mo ba?" I asked Nay who's playing with Mielle as well.
"Ay Nak, sinundo si Kevin sa airport. may biglaang lakad daw dito kaya ayun," she answered and then immediately shift her attention to Mielle.
I think this is about their wedding.
• • •
Weeks had passed and my family were getting closer than ever. Our happy pill, Mielle, was growing up so fast. I always cry whenever i watch her in a peaceful sleep at night.
I havent started planning about her first birthday but Kaylah finally had some planner in mind. I know she'd be the one to move about this kind of thing.
Watching Mielle sleep is like seeing Moe in his calm face.
I smiled as tears run down my face. He surely had missed a lot. As in every single thing. Sometimes i feel like im the most bad person in the entire world for not reuniting the two world that is bound to meet. I was always the hindrance. I was always the controller. I was always the most selfish one.
I dont know how to tell him. I dont know how he would react. Will he ever accept her? Will he ever love her the way that i do? Or eve more than that?
"Julie?" A whisper ring my ears and i suddenly wiped my tears away.
"Hmm?" I cleared my throat and once my face was clean, i turned around and saw Kaylah infront of me.
"Are you okay?" And my best friend will always feel and know whether im okay or not.
I nodded once and i heard her sighed as she sat right beside me.
"Tara nga muna't lumabas," She held my hand and led me out of Mielle's room. She asked Tita Terry and Tita Mila to take care of Mielle for awhile.
"Here is your key. Go for a night slow drive. It'll help you. Antagal mo na din naman hindi ginawa yan. Your handay not lead where you're going but your heart will," she said meaningfully and let me in the car as she buckled the seatbelt, put the key on the ignition and then locked me in.
Maybe this is what i need. Maybe this is what i have to do.
I wiped my tears as they stream down my cheeks again.
I drove slowly around the city not realizing where im heading. Stop and waited for the red light, listened to music as i tapped my fingers on the steering wheel, and then another stop that led me to a place i have never been to for such a long time.
Paper Lanterns.
Moe's.
I was also surprised. What am i even doing here?
It's 10 in the evening and the night will slowly fade soon. I cant be far from home.
I started the engine again but when i tried, it isn't starting at all. It was fine right before i came here.
