Star Gazer (Josh Dun)

Irresistible

You know those days where you feel "eh" about life? You don't have any emotion, you feel a little sick, no purpose to yourself? It's happening to me.

I thought going to the star gazing event would take my mind off things. Maybe I chose the right thing.

I lay my head on the ground covered by my large blanket and my body spread out across it. The coldness of the ground seeps through it still making its way to bite at my skin.

The sky is crystal clear and you can see stars. Not a cloud in sight. A few telescopes were placed around the little patch of grass people are currently settled at.

I look into the dark sky clouded my little specs of light and search for my sign. Leo. After locating the big dipper I find my way around Leo and point to it even though I have no company.

"Remi!" A familiar voice to the left of me appears. A man in a flannel shirt comes up to me and I soon realize it's my friend David.

"David! Long time no see?" I ask still laying down but focusing my attention on him.

"Yah, hey its nice seeing you but I gotta go... some kid moved the telescope out of place and now people are complaining they can't see Jupiter," David Explains as he starts to go off.

"Nice seeing you!" I yell at him and focus my attention back to the stars.

I sit up and pull my knees to my chest and look straight ahead; then I think.

After Sarah died, you are a nobody. You should do something about it. Nobody loves you. Your parents rejected you and Sarah took you in as a single mother then also decided to die. You should too.

Tears start to swell up in my eyes and close them to get rid of them.

"Hey, can I sit here?" I turn my head and see a boy around my age with flaming red hair. I nod my head and scoot over to make room for him. As I look at him I notice a large tattoo sleeve covering his right arm.

"How are you not cold?" I ask. He's wearing a tank top and it's fairly cold at night. He looks at me and shrugs his shoulders and looks up at the sky.

I lay down also and try to find as many constellations as possible. I find Ursa Major and point to it getting the boy's attention.

"That's Ursa Major right there. Its sopposedly a bear, but I sorta see it... oh god I'm rambling..." I continue and he chuckles next to me. I look to my side and watch him as he puts his arms behind his head making it a little elevated.

"I never got your name?" I asked him. He turned his head and opened his mouth to speak,

"I'm Josh. What's your name?" He replied.

"Remi," I say and look away from him and to the stars.

"You like stargazing?" He asks.

"Yah... guess you could say that. I just needed to take my mind off things." I respond and the bad thoughts slowly sink back into my head. I shake the thoughts away and search for more constellations.

"Oh, I like stargazing also," His grin is visible from my peripheral vision. I nod my head to repsond.

I turned my head to face his. He noticed and followed my gesture. We gaze into eachothers faces like we are the stars.

His Dark eyes sparkle as the stars twinkle in the sky above. A cool breeze blows my white hair covering my grey eyes.

After the breeze it turned into a gust of wind causing my body to shake.

"Dude. You're shaking," Josh says pointing out the obvious.

"Thanks captain obvious," I giggle and start to rub my arms for extra warmth.
I ball up into a fetal position with my back facing Josh. I stare at the group of people crowding around the small telescope making oohs and aws. I'm curious so I get up quickly to shuffle across the grass to see.

I ask David what is going on as he looks through the telescope,

"What is it?"

"It's the rocket Russia Launched not to long ago. You can see it orbiting,"

He responds and moves the telescope sharply following the object. I have no interest in it so I walk back to the blanket with Josh on it.

"What's all the commotion about?" Says Josh and scratches the back of his neck.
I shrug my shoulders and sit down next to him and focus my eyes onto the stars.

"Do you believe we all turn into a star when we die?" Josh breaks the silence.

"It think all of that is bull. I don't think we go to heaven or hell, or get reincarnated. I believe when we die it's all over, everything is black all you can't feel a thing. But whatever you believe will happen after you die, will happen. If you think you'll go to heaven, you'll go," I breathe out without any breaks. Josh looks at me dumbfounded and his mouth slightly open. I shrug my shoulders and sit cross legged. I cock my head to the sky and see the stars as they brightly lit the sky.

"I think we would be great friends," He breaks the non awkward silence and puts his phone into my lap. I look at him putting on my why look.

"Your number," He laughs. I nod my head in an understanding way and continue to enter my number into his large phone.

"Why do you need such a big phone?" I ask him as I give him his phone back. He shrugs his shoulders mockingly like I always do.

I take out my phone and admire how small it is compared to his. I bring it up to my face and showed Josh why I asked him that. He smiles showing off his teeth and brings his head up to look at the sky.

"Oh! Look a shooting star! Make a wish," Josh bounces like a bubbly 4 year old and points to the moving star crossing the sky.

I make my wish.

I wish to find someone that loved me as much as Sarah did