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#Prayers4LucasColy
Tyla
I was balling my eyes out as I sat on the couch. Royalty sat next to me also crying.
Royalty hugged me and we cried together.
"Yall," I heard Antie Chandra say
I sniffed constantly as I looked at her.
"I bought you guys some hot chocolate. Extra marshmallows. Just how you like it"
I looked at the cups then went back to crying mode. Royalty stood up about to walk away when Antie ChaCha hugged her.
"It's gonna be okay. Things are gonna get better."
"What (sniffs)... what if she doesn't come back?" Chandra shook her head "she will."
I relaxed for a few minutes. Chandra went upstairs to go check on Kayden. Chayden and Amaiya sat there quietly. Xavier came out of his room and looked at Royalty and I.
"Why are you guys always crying?" He asked looking at us with soft eyes.
I lifted him up.
"Did I do something?" I shook my head
"Christmas is in two days. Where's Kim?" I shook my head as hot streams came down my face. Chayden took Xavier from me going into the kitchen.
I blinked a few times telling myself to calm down.
"Okay I'm okay."
KIMBERLY
"So how are you feeling now"
I took a deep breath
"I feel better. Relieved"
She nodded with her legs crossed, "That's good. Good good good. This must have been something you've been trying to accomplish for awhile"
I nodded
"Tell me. Before, when you still had this hurt inside you. Who do you think was the blame for all of it?"
I bit my lip thinking. She handed me a tissue.
"It's okay to cry. We're just being honest"
"Thanks." I wiped the tears that were about to slip from face.
"I blamed myself."
She nodded writing down things.
"With you blaming yourself... did you always find hatred for yourself?"
"... yeah. I guess"
The therapist sat up fixing her glasses, "You guess or you know?"
I was quiet for a few seconds, "Yeah I found hatred for myself"
"And is that why you changed your name to Kimberly?"
"Yeah, I wanted to change myself. So I thought that... that when I changed my name then maybe I'll be a different person."
"Yes, indeed and is that what happened?"
I nodded wiping away my tears.
"Why are you crying?"
"... cause when I changed my name. I still had my past and I turned out to be angrier with myself."
She wrote in her notebook.
"Tell me. If you had to define Arielle how would you define her?"
"She was a fun girl that just wanted to be nothing but happy."
