American Woman

Chapter 37

The next day I felt bad. For not only engaging in Lenny's destructive behavior with him, but for all the things I said about Mayte and the baby. That poor innocent baby hasn't done anything to me. And neither has Mayte for that matter. She's been nothing but a good friend to me. And how do I repay her? I had to slam her and her unborn child in some sick attempt to make myself feel better and bond with my husband.

By July I couldn't make any more excuses as to why Lenny and I couldn't come to Paisley and I was hoping if maybe I was around them I could work through some of the jealousy issues. When I started to pack my bag for the trip, I pulled out the necklace Prince gave me. It was still in the box and the note still unread. I never go anywhere anymore that would require fancy jewelry so I had forgotten about it to a degree. I decided to finally read the note.
Dearest Jensen,
Seeing the way you looked in this necklace and how much you loved it, Eye knew it had to be yours. Eye hope each time you wear it you will feel as beautiful as you looked in it and as beautiful as you are inside and out. Eye will cherish your friendship all of my days.

I am the ultimate shitty friend. I wanted to be the friend I should be...Mayte deserved to have her best friend join in on the excitement, throw her a shower, go shopping for baby clothes. I was determined to put my feelings aside and be that for her. I know she would do it for me.

When we arrived I was greeted with the same big hug I always am from her except this time her slightly protruding belly brushed up against mine. "You look amazing! May I?" I asked referring to touching her bump. "Of course!" She replied beaming. I took my hand and placed it gently on her stomach and held it there for a few seconds. "I don't feel anything." I laugh. "Oh nobody has yet...Except me! And I feel somersaults sometimes! It is the craziest most amazing feeling. Like little butterflies fluttering. It really gets going when Prince plays his guitar or sings."
"Awe that's really sweet. So are y'all wanting boy or a girl?"
"Oh we don't care! As long as it's healthy. We are going to find out what it is soon though."
"Really? You can do that?"
"Yeah it's the new thing for people to get an ultrasound to find out the gender. That way you can go ahead and decorate and buy clothing."
"That's pretty cool. Wonder how often they get it wrong?!!"
"I have no idea! Wouldn't that be awful! Not that I would really care though...I will love it just the same." She says while stoking her tummy and smiling down at it. Seeing the love radiating out of her was beyond words. I was truly happy for her and felt bad for avoiding her for the past few months. I decided to make up for lost time and suggested going baby shopping a couple days later.

We had such a great time browsing around a bunch of stores for baby stuff. Since they didn't know the gender yet, we mainly just looked at things like baby monitors, furniture, and anything not gender specific. We both got a little lost in some of the baby clothes though. They were so tiny! By the time we got back in the late afternoon, Mayte decided to take a nap.

I decided to see what the men were up to since I hadn't seen much of either of them since we arrived at Paisley. I knew where they would be. When I got to the studio door and saw it was slightly ajar I stopped before entering when I heard Lenny's voice say "yeah man pregnancy sex is the bomb! It is indescribable just knowing your child is inside them...it just takes everything to another level. And pregnancy pussy! Oh man have you noticed yet that it tastes different? It's so sweet...I can still remember it." My heart was at my feet and the tears in my eyes blurred my vision as I thought Prince made eye contact with me through the crack in the door. I turned around abruptly to make my way back to the bedroom.

Before I made it, I heard heels clicking behind me and Prince yell "Jensen! Wait! Stop!" I stopped and took a deep breath and quickly wiped the tears from my eyes. I didn't want him to know I heard or how badly it had upset me so without turning around I said "hey I'm heading to the bedroom. Maytes asleep. We shopped until we dropped." Suddenly I felt his hands on my arms and he turned me around to face him. I looked down at our feet still trying to avoid him seeing me. "Jensen I know you overheard that. It wasn't what it seemed. It was my fault." I finally looked up at him with my red puffy eyes and could see the pity in his reaction. "Really? How is it your fault that my husband was going on about how great the sex with Lisa was and how lame it is with me?"
"That's not what he said at all Jensen. He never said a negative thing about you momma. I was just being stupid and said that even though I'm totally digging Maytes pregnant body right now I was afraid I might not as much as the pregnancy progresses into the later stages. He was trying to convince me I would no matter what. He loves you Jensen. He would be an idiot not to be more than satisfied with you."
"How do you know? I could suck in bed."
"Oh I have a feeling you probably do suck...in a good way!" He smirks as I let out a slight chuckle. "Leave it to you to go there!" I say while shaking my head.
"I'm sorry. Just trying to see that pretty smile of yours. Please don't be mad at him. He's never said anything to me to not make me think he doesn't love you with all his heart."
"Well he has a funny way of showing it lately. "
"Just keep sticking by him. He will come back around. I promise."
"Thanks Prince. I hope you're right."
"Jensen don't you know by now...I'm always right!" He says while giving me a tight squeeze.

I decided to not let Lenny know what I heard. What was the point? We had bigger fish to fry anyway. However the sting of his words did keep me awake that night and so I crept out of bed to see if Mayte and Prince were still up. Maybe I could convince him to let me kick his ass in a game of pool. That might make me feel better. As I made my way towards the living room I heard "I felt it baby! It moved! Oh my god! That was amazing!"
"Wait! I think it's about to do it again...right here. Move your hand over here. Feel it?"
"Yes! Oh Mayte that was incredible."
"It's our baby...I love you Prince."
"I love you too momma. So much! Let me show you." With that I knew it was time to go back to the bedroom. I was already feeling depressed enough with my husband who I had no connection to anymore and now my best friends overjoyed with a baby, something I'm realizing I may never have. So I didn't want to stay and listen to them have amazing sex. I didn't need to start desiring something else I can't have...Prince.