Old Friends (Janet and Toni Fanfic)

Chapter 35

Janet

From my house to the plane; from the plane to Europe; from the airport to my hotel; the one thing on my mind was Toni and all the things I wish I would have said before I got in the car that morning. Pictures of her smile, and the taste of her lips, and the smell of her body, god, that vanilla... it was all so far away and it was agonizing. I couldn't stop thinking about it. Every passing second was an eternity and another mile away from my Toni Michele.

I couldn't believe how attached we grew in that short month, and in any other circumstance, I would have thought we were moving way too fast. I all but asked her to move in with me. I laid all of myself bare and she'd seen me totally naked in every sense of the word. I've given her the absolute best and worst of me, and so if she's not here, she's taken my near entirety with her wherever she is. And I think that's why it hurts so bad.

The kids wondered why I wasn't talking, and even Gil seemed surprised that I was so sad about it, even though I was beyond excited to go back on tour and see everyone again. But some things just took priority over other things.

"So don't tell me you're gonna be a party pooper the whole time, bitch," Gil leaned over next to my seat on the plane just before landing.

"No, I'm sorry, I won't... I just--as soon as I call her when we touch down, I'll be okay."

I kept telling myself this over and over, but as much as I loved her voice, it was her face that I missed the most. Her touch. All the things I couldn't have.

"Okay," he side-eyed me.

"This sucks though, I'm not gonna lie," I admitted.

"I know, 13 years worth of lovers and I've never seen you like this."

"Really, is it that bad?" I cringed.

"Kind of. But hey, it's okay, I mean you love her, so..."

He left to go pack all of his stuff up and prepare for the landing. A 13 hour flight, and I really only got about an hour and a half of sleep the entire time. Once we landed, it was already late into the night, but I didn't care. I needed to hear her voice.

People were trying to take my picture in the airport and they were screaming my name and it really was extremely hectic, but I blocked all of it out, charging through the airport to get a free moment and call her. She had sent me a couple text messages in the mean time while I was still in the air, and although they made me smile, sometimes it just wasn't enough.

All of my luggage got put in the car, and as I saw the rest of the crew off, I quickly hopped in and clicked my number 2 speed dial.

It rang a few times more than what I expected before I did the quick math in my head and realized it was 4 in the morning there.

"Janet Jackson?" Her deep, groggy voice bellowed over the phone. It gave me butterflies. "Is that you?"

"Yeah, baby, it's me." I bit my lip and looked out my tinted windows. There were people everywhere who awaited my arrival. Although it was extremely exciting, it would have to wait.

"Hi!" She tried to add a little more enthusiasm in her voice. I chuckled.

"I know it's 4 in the morning there, so I won't talk long, but I just wanted to let you know I landed safely."

"No, Jan, I swear you can call me whenever. 7 times out of 10 I'll pick up for you, baby. I'm glad you landed safely though. The flight was good? Long, I bet."

"Oh, Toni, the flight was hell. I was miserable," I pouted, playing with the strings in my sweatpants. I couldn't help but feel like Joey was eavesdropping on my conversation.