Hermione: Harry, if you're so magical why can't you fix your own eyesight?
Harry: Why would I get rid of my glasses for no apparent reason? The fan girl number would drop so rapidly and I'd have to hand over the fame to Cedric Diggory. GOD, HERMIONE, YOU'RE SO STUPID!
Ron: Hello, Harry!
Harry: Oh god, it's the ginger ninja
Hermione: Oh my gosh...
Ron: What?
Hermione: IT'S ED SHEERAN! *Hugs Ron*
Ron: Looks like Harry's losing his fan girls even with his glasses *tuts*
Harry: Fine! I'll go seek advice!
*Later on that day Harry finds Voldemort and Cedric who are both wearing nerd glasses and has a meeting with them*
Cedric: So, you want more fan girls?
Harry: Please, Ceddy, ever since I went to see The Hunger Games movie the fan girl o-meter has dropped so rapidly I had a mental breakdown. You know everyone thinks Peeta Mellark is more fit than both of us?
Cedric: Oh come on! What has he got what we haven't got?
Voldemort: Blue eyes, blonde hair, he became a rock -
Cedric: NOBODY ASKED FOR YOUR OPINION! *Whacks Voldemort*
Voldemort: Alright, sparkles, there was no need to slap me with your handbag
Harry: Whatever dude, grow some hair and get a nose
Voldemort: -_-
Cedric: Well, look on the bright side, Harry. You've been going strong for ten years. The Hunger Games is a sort of recent thing and if Hermione has dropped out of your fan club, so be it. She wasn't worth it. Here, check your fan mail. *Hands Laptop*
Harry: *Opens up Facebook page* Good goshness! Have you seen my fans?
Cedric: Well there we go, you forget about Peeta Mellark. And if push comes to shove I'll show him my sparkles
Harry: But dude, some people think you should play Finnick Odair in The Hunger Games, you could betray us again!
Cedric: Don't worry only rumors (True Story)
Harry: Well thanks for the help fan girl doctors! *Leaves*
Voldemort: Look at him, so young...
Cedric: They grow up so fast *Wipes tear from eye*
*Meanwhile on stage Harry is hosting a very special concert*
Harry: I WILL SURVIVE!
Ginny: We love you, Harry!
Harry: THANK YOU FAN GIRL! I KNEW YOU HATED CEDRIC!
Ginny: He finally realises!
Harry: Now, I have a really important announcement *Turns to you* Dear fan girls and fan boys, Harry Potter is really upset and needs more fan girls, he fears he's losing to Peeta Mellark, Gale Hawthorne, Jacob Black and Sparkly fairy unicorn Princess. Would you show him your love by saying: I LOVE HARRY POTTER! In the comments box? Lucy won't mind she -
Lucy: Dude, I write these conversations do you mind?
Harry: DON'T LISTEN TO HER! SHE'LL WEAKEN MY FAN GIRL O-METER EVEN MORE!
Lucy: I've been your fan since I was very young! Don't give me all that Hippogriff poop!
Harry: Fine...*Turns back to you* Don't forget me fan girls and fan boys!
YOU ARE READING
Harry Potter conversations
FanfictionA bunch of conversations by all your favourite characters from Harry Potter
