The birth of the Blue Phoenix - Book 2 (MxM 18+)

Chapter 33: Oblivious

Zach, Wed Mar 6th 2013

How could I not have seen it before? It was practically written all over his face! It is so obvious, I should have realized weeks ago! Shit! I must have hurt him so much! How could I do this? Enjoy my little life selflishly while I was destroying the one who gave it back to me in the inside. I feel so sick with myself I might actually throw up. I need to leave! I need to find another place to stay!

How is it that I had to outright hear the truth to discover this? All the clues were there, I just didn't pay enough attention.

I went into the Subs' room early to drop my bag in my locker before going to Daddy's office to have dinner with him and his friends, as usual. I thought it was empty at first – the club is not very busy on Wednesdays – until I heard Joe's voice coming from one of the stalls. I was rather curious so I sneaked closer to listen to him. He was apparently reassuring a Sub that was rather shaken.

"It's okay," he says, "it happened to me too!"

Oh, are they talking about something sexually embarrassing?

"But that means he was thinking about him while he was fucking me!" the other Sub replies.

I instantly recognize Porter's voice since he's another Sub that I like a lot.

"From what I gathered, he thinks about him pretty much all the time. It's nothing you did," Joe answers with a soothing voice.

So they're apparently discussing a Dom who is obsessed with someone who is not Porter. And from what I heard, he must have mixed up the names while they were going at it. Strange! The Doms usually prefer to call everyone by the nondescript Pet, so that doesn't give away anything.

"Does he know?" Porter asks in a small voice.

"No and he doesn't want him knowing at all, so you will have to keep it to yourself!"

If I thought about making my presence known, I don't anymore! I want to know the little secret and they'll just stop talking about it if I reveal myself.

"Well if he keeps calling Subs Baby during scenes, it will probably end up being noticed," Porter says sarcastically.

Wait! What? Baby? I don't know any other Sub that is called Baby on a regular basis in the club, except from one couple with a Baby/Daddy kink, but I doubt they're concerned. And there's only one Dom who would think of me that way. My blood freezes in my veins as realization suddenly hits me.

"I think Master Aiden was jealous because Zach was having a threesome with Nathan and Master Alexander that night."

I don't need the names at that point. I've fully understood whom they're talking about.

"But Zach always told us they don't think of each other that way!"

"He doesn't, but I think Master Aiden has a different view on this matter. Trust me, Porter, he is completely in love with him. I have been with him enough this past month to see it with my own eyes."

Love? No! No! No! That wasn't the plan!

"Why are you with him so much, then," Porter asks. By that point, it looks like he's sniffling a bit. "Are you jealous?"

"What? No!" Joe exclaims. "I'm just doing what I can to ease his pain a bit. He is a great Dom and he deserves it so much! I'm actually trying to convince Zach to do a scene with him. Once he gets a taste of the sexy beast, I'm hoping he'll start to reciprocate his feelings."

So that's why my friend was subtly trying to put me in Daddy's bed! That solves that mystery.

Of course, he's right: I'm pretty sure that having sex with Daddy will only result in me getting more attached to the man, which is precisely the reason I'm avoiding it. There's no way I'll fall in love again if I can prevent it! But Joe mentioned pain. Gosh, I'm such an idiot... Daddy must have been devastated each time he saw me with another Dom! How could I not see it?