Warm Hands [Hiroomi x Akihito fanfic]

Chapter forty-eight: Risks for the One

Hiroomi Nase

      After enjoying Akihito's company, I continued to do more chores around the house. My arm was still sore from several nights before, but I was determined to heal it quickly. Also because I didn't want Akihito worrying about me. I brought in the logs I had cut and placed them near the stove. I swiped my forehead with my arm and sat in the nearest chair. I looked over at Akihito who was fixing lunch. I chuckled under my breath when I noticed the apron wrapped around his waist. I got up from my seat and accidentally scared him when I slithered my hands onto his sides.

      "Whatcha cooking, Akkey~?" I sung into his ear while resting my head in the nook of his shoulder. I could feel his breathing quicken incrementally.

     "J-just some sandwiches. And there's some ice cream in the f-fridge." He must be stuttering from my presence, I thought as I continued to snuggle into him. His breath would hitch every now and then. You would think he would be used to this kind of affection, but the thought didn't bother me.

     I decided to let him go on this one; we were both sore from the other day so it would be near pointless to try anything. I waltzed back to the table and sat down. I could briefly hear Akihito let out a wind of air as he continued to make our lunches. I started to feel a slight pain in my arm again and the images of that night flashed back into my mind. How else would it have gone? What were our other options? I peered back at him again and then sighed. He doesn't seem to remember most of it, let alone, it doesn't seem to bother him much anymore.

When he was done, he brought the plates over and sat across from me. He immediately devoured his sandwich like he hadn't eaten in days. I smiled and thanked him for the food and dug in as well. It was silent for the most part, besides me complimenting his handiwork and him scuffing at me like it was a joke. We didn't have much food, but he still managed to make a decent sandwich. I felt something was wrong. His expression showed nothing, it was stoic. He showed no pleasure, no disapproval, nothing. He was simply enjoying his sandwich as if nothing had happened these past few days. It started to bother me. When I was about to speak up about the stale atmosphere, he suddenly laid his sandwich down and wiped his face with a cheap napkin. He sat up straight and his face turned sour.

"Hiroomi," he began, sort of mellow and quiet. I stopped eating. I examined his face; it appeared glum now, depressed and concerned. I waited for him to continue, but he took quite a long time to proceed.

"We have to go back." His words were dreaded; They struck me with astonishment. We have to go back? I never expected Akihito to suggest going back after all that had happened. I reminded him briefly of what happened, but he still persisted that we return to the Nase residence. I shook my head and held my face in one hand.

     "You're kidding, right? They'll just capture you again. I can't stand it. What's wrong with staying here forever?" I accidentally yelled at him. He stared at his plate and kept his back straight like he was disappointed in getting an intolerable grade and I was scolding him for it.

      "We have to go back."
      "What's wrong with here?"
      "We have to go back."
       "We're fine here." I slammed my hand onto the table, causing a shooting pain to run up my arm. I groaned and clutched my arm. Akihito saw me do this and stood up in order to lean over the table.

      "Are you hurt?"
     "Hardly, don't worry about it." I didn't mean to sound rude, but it unwillingly came out that way. He stood up straight and sighed, hiding his angered expression behind his hands.

     "I'm constantly worried. It's inevitable!"
     "Don't. It'll only cause you to be unstable. Never worry about me." I understood what he meant; I was constantly worried about him, too.

     "Why are you risking everything for me?" His words quaked. I didn't hesitate to answer.

     "Because I'm madly in love with you–," his hands jerked away from his face and I could see his pupils quiver. His next words shook the seat I sat on. My whole body froze from his enraged response. Akihito stomped out of the cabin. My hands slid off the table and onto my knees and my body slouched against the back of the chair. 

I never thought about myself. His words vibrated throughout my brain for several minutes.

    "That doesn't give you an excuse to neglect yourself. Be selfish for once, damnit! It hurts me more when I see you suffer!" I thought about his words for a second. He was right; I never considered how he felt about my condition. Not only did I not care for myself, I wasn't caring for Akihito as well. Seeing me ripped from my family and being sore from his yumo side must have severely pained him, too. I stared at my hands and sighed. What should I do?

•  •  •

       I walked outside to confront Akihito, but he was nowhere in sight. When I noticed how vacant the area surrounding the cabin was, I started to panic.

      "Akihito?" I hollered for him, but only silence responded. I ran around the property.

     "Akihito?!" I searched everywhere; in the woods, behind the house, even the field where we first drew blood. I stood in that field for a moment, thinking about how he must have felt when he realized he almost killed a stranger. I reached over my shoulder under my coat and could feel the scar's ripples.

     "I'm sorry, Akihito." I fell to my knees and covered my ears.

     "I'm so, so sorry for not caring about myself." I remembered all the times I endured the pain so Akihito wouldn't have to worry. All the lies I told him so he wouldn't know flowed back to me:

"I shouldn't have scared you, I'm sorry Akkey."
  "Like I said, don't get yourself worked up about me."
"Don't be bothered by them, they don't understand how amazing you make me feel."
"But you could have gotten hurt, what were you thinking?"
"Can't you see no matter what you do, I'll still love you as much as I did the day I met you!"
"All I care about right now, is your health, Akkey, nothing else. You are safe here; I will keep you safe."

Now he was gone. What have I done? Where did he go? I certainly made a disaster. I racked my brain in order to think of the possible places.

"We have to go back."

I bolted though the woods, not a moment could be wasted. It was time to go back, like he said. But this time, I wasn't going to run away. It was time to finish this once and for all.

A/n: WOW HEY GUYS SORRY I NEGLECTED THIS.
CRAZY CHAPTER, AM I RIGHT?

ANYWAY, how are all of you guys?
I'm aight, hopefully the next chapter will come sooner than this one.

Happy Easter btw!

Next Update: April, for sure.