ISABEL (Unedited)

Chapter 11

Isabel
Janet had been bugging me to go out with her for the past three weeks. I finally agreed and she took me to a restaurant that just opened around the city. She said that we needed some girl time, away from James. Just time to chit- chat about silly stuff, you know?

She made reservations, as if she knew that I would agree to going out with her. The restaurant was pretty. I loved the northern touch that it had. We got a nice table in corner with a nice window view. I had to admit that it felt good to be out of the house. I loved the new energy that I was feeling.

"So, how long have you and James been together?"

"15 years."

I almost choked on my food. "Seriously?"

She chuckled. "Yes. It's not a big deal. Years are so fast that we barely notice."

"How did you meet?"

"Well, we met in a grocery store. He helped me carry my groceries to my car and then, when I was getting my car keys from my pocket, my keys fell and he caught them. Ever since then, he has been telling people that he had caught the key to my heart and he would remain with it till death do us apart," she laughed.

"Wow! Yep, that's the James Bond I know."

"I thought that it was another one of his jokes because at the time I had a boyfriend. He told me that he would wait for me. He waited a year till I finally gave him a chance. I've called him crazy for doing so, but I'm grateful that we met. I love him," she finished.

Her story made me think of Josh and I. Would we last till death do us apart? Was he serious about me? About us? It really broke my heart to think of us.

"Do you have any children?"

"Yeah!" she laughed. "They stay with my mom. We have an 11-year-old, Marie and 7-year-old, Brendan."

"I'd love to meet them one day."

"You will."

And just then, my attention diverted from Janet to the entrance of the restaurant. O.M.G! Janet followed my gaze, as she tried to figure out what or who caught my attention.

"What's up?" she asked.

My eyes were getting watery, as I had just realised that I had been right all along. I closed my eyes, trying to tell myself that I was just imagining everything, but I wasn't. I really wish I was, though.

"Isabel, talk to me. Why are you crying? You're really worrying me."

"Do you see the guy in a grey coat at the entrance?"

"Yeah."

"That's him."

Janet looked at me very confused. "What?"

I didn't respond. "Ooh! Josh. Wait, that's Josh?"

I nodded. I couldn't help notice the girl that stood by his side. I had totally lost my appetite. It hurt. It hurt soo much. Trying to block the memories of us that were coming to my mind, was painful. I felt so used. So useless. So filthy. So broken. So empty. I guess, I wasn't enough. I had given that guy my time when he needed me. I had taken care of him when he was sick. I made sure that I was always available to him when he needed me. I felt like a used toilet paper. Was that what people called love? Was that the beautiful feeling that everyone felt? Was I supposed to love him more after that? Was I? I didn't understand anything at that moment. If that was how it felt to be in love then, I wanted none of it.

Janet
Josh held onto a blond girl's waist, as they were shown to their table. They didn't look as if they were friends. Friends didn't get their hands all over each other in public, as they were doing. They practically showed enough PDA to convince anyone that they were a couple.