Chapter 40

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"I wanted to know if you want all the photos I took of you because I'm closing this file since we won't have any photo shoot before a while," I ask Shawn and wait for an answer. 

I can hear this dude breathing and feel him thinking out loud on the phone. I don't know if he even realizes that I'm still waiting but it seems like it's a huge decision to take for him. 

"Ummm,... well, I still don't know if I need them or not but... Can you just keep them, please? Because I really don't know and I'm confused right now." He says and I can't hold my laugh. "Stop making fun of me!" 

"AHAHAH but they are only photos, you seem like you're taking the decision of your life!" I say, still laughing. 

Then I start getting out of the house but I just mouth to my grandparents who are in the living room that I'll visit mom before I get back. They nod and focus back to their occupations. 

"Excuse me... What did you say?" I ask because I removed the phone from my ear to hear Nanny wishing me to have a great day. 

"Alyssa, I swear to god that you would have regretted saying that if I was next to you." 

"Excuse me Mister Mendes but you don't scare me and... I have to go because I planned to see Teddy since I haven't seen him in ages..." I say while packing my things in my bag. 

"First, we reference Teddy as 'she' because she's transitioning. Second, since when are you two friends?" He asks while I'm giggling and getting out of the house. 

I didn't know that Teddy was transitioning and I feel a bit guilty because I talked to him... well, to her, many times and I felt completely free when I spent time with her. I know she's not my best friend ever but she may is the only person with who I don't care about who I could be or how I could seem to the other. 

"Oh... since I went to one of your friend's birthday party... We talked a bit and... She seems to be a really chill person and I like this because it's like she doesn't care about what people say... it's a great quality" I say and turn on the engine of my car to get to the mall. 

"Oh, yeah totally... she helps me a lot and understands me as nobody else does. She's always listening to me when I need someone to talk to and she finds the perfect words made all for me. She's a genius in every sense of the term... I wish everyone could experience this because if they did, there would be no pressure on them anymore." He keeps on rambling about the fact that he loves her and I'm just listening to him, admiring this. Admiring the way he's devoted to their friendship and it just makes me want to get to know her even more. 

"Wow" This is the only thing I manage to say. 

"Oh, sorry... I totally forgot, I'm rambling all the time..." he says and I can imagine him scratching his neck and feel embarrassed. 

"Never stop rambling..." I say a bit abruptly but I correct myself right after. "It... It's just the way you talk about her... I wish someone talked about me the way you do with Teddy..." I say with an awkward chuckle because I didn't think about what I said and I just let the words come out from my mouth while I would have preferred keeping this for me. 

"You deserve way more than some words," He says and a silence falls on the phone. None of us talks and I'm sitting here, in my car, A smile growing on my face but he adds something before I have the time to reply. "Words are really powerful but sometimes it isn't enough... Some people don't know they're important to other because people don't tell them how much they represent to them..." 

"They don't want to get hurt. That's it" I almost cut him off but I think that most of the people don't talk about the way they feel because they're afraid. 

Another silence falls around but this time I achieve to say something... more because I still have to join Teddy than to add something. 

"Well, It's really nice to talk with you but Teddy must be waiting for me right now..." I say and he immediately apologizes before we hang up. 

I shut down my phone and drive off to the mall where I find Teddy standing in front of it and the most I approach her, the most I can see her killer gaze that would bury me 6 feet underground. 

I try to find something, as fast as I can, that would make her forget about this and forgive me and the only thing I find surprises me as it makes her laugh her ass off after a long moment of confusion. 

"Sorry, but daddy kept on rambling on how much he loves you when I called him to talk about the photo shoots... and I don't know why I'm telling you that but I wondered if it would make you forgive me for being late..." I say with the biggest smile I can build. 

"That's my girl." She says with a smirk and walks away to the stores. 

We have fun a lot during this shopping session even though I don't really like spending time in the stores. i just love seeing her choosing the clothes she'd buy without even thinking twice. She acts the exact same way as Rosalie does when it comes to fashion and I admire them because they're really patient to take the time to search items among thousands. It's not that I don't like shopping, I love it but I just can't make a choice and sometimes it takes me a whole afternoon. This is the most exhausting thing ever. 

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Hey everybody! here is a new chapter and i hope that you liked it because I didn't post yesterday! (And I also had to talk about Teddy's transitioning because I referenced her as 'he' previously)

Love you all!

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