Counterpoint

Chapter 76

Thomas

   Everything has gone relatively still, each of my siblings are sitting on one of the many couches and peering at Alexander with interest. Mary keeps her distance and sits in an arm chair clear on the other side of the room. Alex fidgets beside me as he holds my hand tightly in his grasp, he has refused to release his hold on me ever since the huddle of comfort had dispersed. My chest grows warm as I look down at his hand in mine, there is a peculiar feeling of eternity that blossoms within me as I look at our conjoined hands. I can see the rest of my life resting between our two palms and it fills me with warmth.

   "So...who is this Thomas?" Lucy pipes up after several minutes of quiet chatter. I blink in surprise before looking amongst my siblings following all of their gazes back to Alexander. He keeps his eyes trained on his lap as he remains ever silent. My lips twitch into the smallest of grins as I notice his discomfort and find a small fragment of appreciation for his shyness. I pull our joined hands into my lap, covering them with my other hand. He peeks at me from the corner of his eye as I grin slightly before returning my attention back to my family.

   "This is Alexander Hamilton." I answer gently. "He is quite easily the most obstinate and secretive man I have ever met," Alex drops his gaze, staring down at the floor. "But he is also one of the kindest and has one of the most vulnerable hearts. It is one of the many reasons that I love him." Alex colors, his ears becoming a bright shade of pink as he tries to hide his flustered expression from all of the prying eyes of the Jefferson brood. Randolph shifts uneasily in his seat beside Anna, I watch him curiously, lifting a single eyebrow in question. "Is something the matter Randolph?"

   "I just feel like an ass." He mutters.

   "He feels bad for assuming that you were straight." Anna finishes. "Especially after his comment in the airport." Randolph shrinks further into the couch, Peter reaching across and placing a comforting hand on his shoulder.

   "Don't feel bad." I reply smoothly. "You didn't know because I hadn't wanted you to know. I was protecting a secret I was asked to keep."

   "Why keep it a secret?" Elizabeth questions. "We wouldn't have shamed you or turned you away."

   "No matter who you decide to spend your life with you will still be our brother." Peter chimes in, his baritone voice seeming to break through the remaining tension. "So, why keep this secret for so long?"

   "It was because of me." Alex murmurs, finally breaking the invisible seal he had placed on his lips. Everyone looks over at him, waiting for more answers to spill from his lips. It is obvious by they way that they are studying him that they don't expect him to be very forthcoming with his thoughts, if only they knew the dormant geyser of opinion resting inside him as I do. "I...Your brother is very understanding of my desire for privacy. He was very willing to accommodate for me."

   "Why the secret?" Mary asks.

   "Are you really one to ask such a question?" Anna quips. "Seems like you have been keeping some pretty big secrets over there sis." Mary says nothing as she simply looks out the window, her angry expression reflecting on the glass. "That's what I thought." Anna mutters with distaste.

   "Anna," I scold. "don't forget who your family is."

   "He kept us a secret because I am selfish and afraid." Alex replies before any more stabs could be made. "I... I'm a mess of a person. I make mistakes that I can't take back and I hurt people when I don't mean to." His hand goes slack between mine. "Your brother is a good man and he is too good for someone like me." I tighten my hold on his hand, struggling to keep myself from rushing into singing his praises and devoting my thoughts to his worship. Each of his words seeming to drive themselves into my heart like serated sabers, hacking away at the already vulnerable organ. "You don't know me and I don't imagine there will be much of an opportunity for you to know me, but I want to just apologize to all of you for what I have put your brother through, while also thanking you for your part in making him who he is."