The Diary of Existing

NINE

NINE

After walking around with Jacqueline she took me back to the headmistress' office and left. My mother and headmistress Edwards were in the middle of a conversation when I had arrived. She smiled at me and asked how I enjoyed the little tour. Of course I lied and faked my enthusiasm. She continued to converse with my mother a little bit more and I sort of tuned them out.

Headmistress

It sounded so pretentious. Completely pretentious that I was going to a boarding school in England where their principal is called a headmistress. It sounded so pretentious because I knew that I didn't really feel like I belonged here. I felt like being here was putting me back to square one. I was feeling the same way I did when I first arrived at the institution. Back then I didn't like it either, and I knew that I didn't belong there. It felt weird having to even have step foot at that place. And now here I was. In a more upscale version of it where their Dr. Arbour is called Headmistress Edwards. It wasn't like I had anything against her. Her politeness felt completely genuine and I felt bad that this was how I was reacting to it.

"Alexandra." She called for my attention, as I was lost in thought.

"Your mother and I were just discussing how you were going to enjoy staying here." headmistress Edwards smiled at me as she said those words. She genuinely believed that I was going to enjoy it here. It made me wonder if she was aware of where I was coming from.

"Your mother has told me that you do have to leave the area during Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays for your therapy sessions." Well I guess she does.

"That won't be a problem. Transportation will be provided by us, to assure you'll go and come back safely. And if transportation can't be provided I've notified your therapist and assured her that we have conference rooms readily available, you can even use my office if that makes you comfortable." She said, as if the area of where I'll be interrogated with even matter. I haven't even met my therapist yet. My mother suddenly looked down on her hands, she avoided my gaze and as I looked back at headmistress Edwards she was looking at my mother with a faint smile.

What was going on?

"I spoke to your mother while you were walking around with Jacqueline and I told her that you should move in tomorrow." she dropped the bomb on me with that one. It all felt too fast. I had literally spent one day in my room in my new house. Could I even call it that? The idea of it was funny to me at this point. I faked a smile when I saw how headmistress Edwards was waiting for a response.

"Ms. Rose, would you mind if I spoke to your daughter in private?" headmistress Edwards suddenly told my mother and she was a tad bit surprised. It wasn't like my mother could say no to her anyway. My mother got up and Amanda followed her out along with Ms. Thompson. The large doors to headmistress Edwards' office closed and there was nothing but silence. The faint sound of girls talking and nature could be heard. There was a huge window behind headmistress Edwards desk that had a view of the entire front of the main building, which held all the classes, along with a view of the ocean and the road that led up to the school.

Headmistress Edwards had smiled at me, there was silence in the room and I found myself just staring at her. I looked at the neatness of her hair. It was pulled back into a perfect bun. Her auburn tied perfectly, and I could tell she had really long her. I couldn't spot a single wrinkle on her face. Her skin looked fantastic, and she wasn't too pale. Her eyes brown and soft like her personality. She had what I would assume to be extravagantly expensive pearls on her ears and her neck. Her lipstick shade suited her overall look. Her clothes seemed pressed neatly and not a single crease.