The Diary of Existing

FIFTY FIVE

FORTY FIVE

The following day, I woke up and found the side of my bed empty.

Last night after we ate dinner, me and Jacqueline laid on my bed and began to talk about what was keeping her busy. She began to vent to me some of the things that kept bothering her throughout the day, and I listened willingly. It felt nice having to hear someone vent about their life rather than me venting to myself with mine.

We talked a lot that night and ended up falling asleep on my bed. Her first, and a few seconds later I followed. We were equally exhausted, her physically and me mentally.

I looked over at Jacqueline's bed and she wasn't there either. I turned to see the clock say it was 8:45AM. I had enough time, the party wasn't to begin until later 12:30 noon. I reached over my phone, and there was a sticky note on the screen.

Hey there, woke up earlier than you. Have fun at your party, don't forget to EAT! - J

I smiled at Jacqueline's little note, and how efficiently placed it was on my phone knowing it would most likely be the first thing I grab. I pull it off, open the bedside drawer and stick it there, tucking it away. I looked at my phone and I had a couple of messages.

Did you find anything good to wear? Do you want me to pick you up and we can go together?

The first message was from my mother. I shot her a quick text and said I'd love to walk in with her, but I didn't want her to have to be driven all the way here then back to Kensington, so instead I told her I'd take a cab or a bus and meet her there and we'd walk in together. Then I switched over to the next text message.

Can't wait to see you and your mother later. I left late last night to go over my mom's place, stayed there and so I'd come pick you up but my mom needs help.

The second was from Wesley. I smiled and replied quickly with an it's okay message before moving to the third one.

I'm sorry Alex. Please text me, call me, don't ignore me.

It was from Henry. I found my smile fading, and I found myself biting on my lower lip. I sighed and opted not to answer that text. When I got to the last one, seeing the name across the screen alone made me not want to open it. It was from Morgan. I sighed deeply before mustering the courage to open it.

Let's be civil at this party. But I wouldn't let my guard down.

I felt like I was in an episode of Gossip Girl or a scene from Mean Girls. This was overly dramatic, and I found it cringy. But at the same time, I did feel a sense of panic rush over me. I didn't know what Morgan was planning to do at this party. She was so impulsive who knows if she just stood at the center of the room and belted out all my secrets at a high note with Angel probably playing tunes on the piano as background music to accompany her revelations over my secrets.

I locked my phone and tossed it at the foot of my bed. Getting it away from me like it was some disease. I didn't want to read or reply to either of the last two messages. There weren't ones that I wanted to even receive that morning. Whe my phone buzzed, I didn't even want to reach out for it but my curiosity was too strong.

Okay, I had a town car sent to you. Should be there in an hour or so, depending on traffic. I'll wait for you before exiting the door, we'll walk in together.

My mother's message had this hint of sweetness to it. I didn't know if it was the line about walking in together, but I felt like this was the type of message you'd receive from a mother. One filled with somewhat joyous concern, if it existed. Nonetheless, I was glad that it was sent, because it definitely pulled a smile out of my face.