Spiderman/Avengers oneshots

LOKI!

Peter skipped down the hall way into the living room. He plopped down next to Loki. 

"Hi Uncle Loki. How are you today?" I smile up at Loki. He smiles and says, 

"Quite good, young child, how are you?" Peter puts his feet up on the couch. 

"Goo! Can you show me magic?" Peter asks, like a child. Loki smirks and turns himself into a girl. 

"That's so cool!" Peter exclaims bouncing  up and down. Loki has long black hair, and is also wearing a normal outfit girl outfit. I hear someone walk into the room and turn my head around to see my dad. 

"Peter! You didn't tell me you where having a girl over!" My eyes go wide and  look over at Loki. 

"Oh-" He cuts me off. 

"I'll let you two be, don't forget protection!" Without be being able to say something, he throws a pack of something that hits me in the face and walks away with a chuckle. Peter looks down at his hands. Condoms. My dad gave me condoms because I am sitting next to my Uncle. He blushes, then realize what exactly he  holding. Peter  scream and throw the pack across the liking room. He then looks up at Loki wide eyed, and his expression mimics Peter's, absolute horror. Loki changes back into his original self. Both, still red faces. 

"Why did Stark have Condoms on him?" Loki says uncomfortably. Peter's face turns a darker red and it looks like he wants to puke. 

"I don't want to know." He mumbles. 

............................

Peter sat by Loki at the dinner table, across from Tony. However neither of them where able to meet his eye. 

"So, Peter, did you have fun with your  lady friend?" Steve's face turns red, Natasha, Clint and Bruce raise an eyebrow. 

"No, you see, I didn't have a girl over-" Tony cut him off again. 

"What do you mean, there was a girl with black hair sitting on the couch," Thor starts laughing, as he begins to understand who the 'girl' really was. The Avengers look at him confused. 

"I was sitting by Uncle Loki and asked him to show me magic, so he changed into a girl." Loki provides a demonstration and turns into the same girl. The table gasps and Thor was still laughing. Tony's face turned a bright shade of red. 

"Stark, why did you have Condoms on you?" Loki asks. Thor stopped laughing but is still smirking, Steve's face goes dark red and Peter's head falls onto the table. 

"You never know when Pepper-" Peter screams and covers his ears. 

"DAD STOP! EWWWW GROOOOSSSS! MY INNOCENT MIND! STEVE'S INNOCENT MIND! STOP!" Steve blushes even more. 

"Oh yes, we couldn't spoil the 100 year old virgins mind!" Tony says smirking. Steve still looks uncomfortable but says, 

"I'll have you know every time I have.....it a bald eagle is born." Tony chuckles. 

"That must be why there aren't very many of them," Steve blushes again. Everyone else laughs, even Peter. Clint stops laughing an exclaims, 

"When you change into a girl does every thing  change?" He makes wild hand gestures. Steve and Loki blush more. Natasha nudges him and Bruce face Palms. 

"WHAT?" He says while shrugging. Peter picks a green bean off of his plate and throws it at Clints face. Clint then picks up a baked potato from his plate and throws it at Peter, some of it flying onto Loki's face. 

And that is the food fight that started Civil War 2. 

...............

A/N Loki transforming into different genders requested by @marihasfallen IDK what happened to this chapter, I guess my dirty mind happened. ANYWAY I hope you liked it, 

-EB

(Sorry it is short)