...
I looked between him and Kevin. I felt like my head was spinning. "What kind of mindfuckery is this?" I looked back at Kevin. "What is he doing here?"
"He said your mom sent him over here; said he had something important to tell you," he replied. "And you just," I shrugged, "let him in here? No questions asked. What the fuck Kevin!"
"Yes. That's your family."
"Shit. He better not be," I mumbled underneath my breath.
I looked at Oliver. I couldn't wrap my brain around why he was here.
"Alyssa look. It's okay. You can go ahead and talk to your cousin and I'll just meet you at the hospital. Call me when you're on your way."
"No. Kevin wait," I said trying to stop him, but he was too quick. He was already out the door. Annoyed, I turned to look at Oliver. "Cousin, huh?"
He smiled at me.
"How've you been," I asked him.
"Good," he smiled playfully.
"That's good," I grinned. Oliver didn't take his eyes off of me. "So..."
"So..."
"What brings you here?"
Oliver jammed his hands into his pockets. "I've missed you and I wanted to see your face," he grinned.
I nodded my head and smiled. "Okay."
"Okay," he repeated with a sportive grin.
"So, um...how you've been?"
"You already asked me that baby," Oliver smiled.
I gave a light laugh and grinned. I nodded my head. "Right. Sorry."
"Nah. It's okay," he replied, his eyes flickering in the light. "It's nice to know that you care." Oliver looked at me and ran his index finger along his lips. "But uh, everything is going well. I've been doing a lot of traveling lately and to be honest it can get pretty lonely sometimes," he said looking into my eyes. "It'd be nice to have someone to share it with."
"Hm. I can imagine."
"Just so you know I'm talking about you," Oliver said, his face lighting up. His smile was infectious, so when he smiled, I smiled though I probably shouldn't have.
"That's very sweet of you, but um...I'm married."
Oliver could barely find the words to speak. "Wow. You're married. That's uh...funny," he said rubbing his finger across his lips, "after us I didn't think you'd even consider marriage, but wow! Almost three years later and here you are," he said pointing to me.
"Yep. Here I am."
"So. I'd love to know. What changed your mind?"
"You ask that question like I was opposed to marriage."
"Well you sure as hell didn't want to marry me. You made that very clear."
"That's not true. None of what I said back then was true."
"So if that's the case, what's the real reason you broke up with me?"
"Timing."
"Are you saying that if the timing was different we'd still be together?"
"I'm not saying anything at all. Um," I paused, " I think it's time for you to go. We've done enough rehashing for the day."
"Ah. There she is."
"What? What are you talking about?"
"I'm talking about you: the woman who always avoids the question that is asked, the woman who finesses her way out of any real, deep discussion about what's going on in that complex mind of hers."
I looked away and sighed.
"You are still the same mystery to me at twenty-two that you were at seventeen." Oliver moved closer to me. "That was a part of your appeal. I'm assuming that's what drew Ron and Kevin in too." Oliver stood so close to me it became intoxicating. So intoxicating the air around me became thin. I felt like my breath was in his lungs and maybe if I kissed him his breath would steady my breathing, but I knew better. Yet, that didn't stop my eyes from lingering over his lips or my hands from wanting to caress the memory from his skin. I inhaled the warmth of his hand on my cheek and exhaled his name like a forgotten prayer being answered. "Lee," I whispered and then I opened my eyes. I came to and remembered where I was. Knowing that our moment had to come to an end, Oliver gently stroked my cheek one last time. "It was good seeing you," he said just before gathering up the courage to leave.
I stood in the living room and waited for him to exit my apartment. "Alyssa," he said turning around. "It's a shame we didn't work out." He looked around the room. "This could have been us. I wanted this to be us."
"I know," I replied softly.
Oliver stared at me longingly. I stood still for a moment letting him take all of me in for what I thought would be the last time. "Listen," I started, "If... we're done here I have somewhere that I need to be. So if you could just---"
"Let myself out. Got it," Oliver interjected. He headed back over to the door. "I'm sorry for dropping by unannounced. It won't happen again." Oliver opened the door and walked out.
I sat down on the couch and tried to get my bearings. After a few minutes of clearing my head. I grabbed my keys and purse and called Kevin.
"Hey Kev. I'm leaving out now," I said as I left out of the apartment.
"Okay. How'd it go with Oliver? He seemed like a real cool dude."
"Oliver is my ex-boyfriend not my cousin," I blurted out to Kevin.
"What!?" Kevin responded in a state of shock.
"And you would have known that if you would have let me finish talking instead of rushing out. Like, what even was that?"
"Damn. I'm sorry baby. I figured that if it was about your mom you'd need more time to talk."
I rolled my eyes. "Mmhm."
"So what did he want?"
I exited the elevator. I shrugged my shoulders. "I can't really say for sure."
"Well what did y'all talk about?"
"We didn't have much of a conversation, so...nothing really." I checked my lipstick in the car mirror while waiting at a red light.
"Alyssa," Kevin said sucking his teeth.
"Yes Kevin," I said adjusting my hair.
"Okay. You're being tight-lipped I see. So why'd y'all break up," Kevin asked. The light turned green. "Uh. Long story. I don't really want to get into it right now." I changed the subject. "So. How's Mark? Have you seen him yet? Heard anything?"
"Nah. I haven't seen him yet. We're all just sitting here."
"Oh. Everybody's there already?"
"Yeah."
"Okay. Well let me get off the phone and focus on the road. I'll see you in fifteen."
"Iight. Later."
"Later."
...
