"Alyssa," I heard a name call out to me. My eyes slowly opened and adjusted to the face standing above me. "Hey Lys you okay," Oliver asked as he slowly sat down beside me. "What happened," I muttered. "I was telling you about your mom and then you---"
"Blacked out---" I said softly. I sat up in the seat some more and got comfortable. I sighed. "I can't believe I fell for her shit again. Damn," I mumbled.
"Alyssa, I'm---"
I cut him off. "I'm really not in the mood to hear your shit."
"Alyssa, I'm trynna apologize to you."
"Well you can keep that shit! You helped her hurt me Lee!"
"And I was wrong."
"Why'd you do it?" I snapped.
"Your mother told me that you were in a bad relationship and that she wanted me and you back together, said that I needed to remind you of what we had so that you'd leave Kevin."
"Wow," I mouthed.
"I know. It was beneath me, but---"
"Hm. Is it?" I asked cocking my head to the side.
"What is that supposed to mean?"
"You cheated on me while we were dating. It's not exactly out of the norm that you would try to break up someone else's relationship even if it is your ex-girlfriend's."
"What! Come on. That's not fair."
I shrugged my shoulders. "That's just the facts," I said as I stood up. I felt a little lightheaded from moving too quickly. I held my head and stood for a minute.
"Are you okay?"
"I'm fine," I snapped back. "Just stop talking," I said before walking away.
"Where are you going?" Oliver asked from behind me. I sighed and ignored his question. I walked back into my bedroom and over to my dresser. I swiftly rummaged through my dresser drawers disappointed that I was coming up empty handed. I walked over to my closet and walked inside. A few minutes later Oliver walked into my bedroom. He called my name. "Go home Lee," I huffed just as he walked fully into the closet. "Alyssa what are you doing," he asked when he saw me sitting on the closet floor. "Mind ya business," I said as I continued to rummage through yet another drawer. "Damn," I mumbled, "Where is it?"
"Alyssa what are you looking for?"
I hastily stopped what I was doing and looked up at him. "Damn it Lee! Why the fuck do you care?"
"Damn. Can't a brotha be worried?"
"No," I said sharply before standing up. "You gave up that right." I shoved past him. "Move," I ordered. I made my way further back into the closet and began to check the shelves. "Damn it Kevin," I mumbled to myself. "I told you about touching my shit. I know his ass moved it." I moved boxes and bags out of the way until I stumbled across something I had never seen before: a hand carved wooden box tucked safely away in the corner of the shelf.
"Damn when Kevin moved in he really moved in," Lee teased.
I hushed him. "Shhh. Shut up Lee." I gave my attention back to the box in front of me and slowly opened it. Relief washed over me when it revealed the glock Terrance got me for my 18th birthday. I pulled it out of the box and ran my fingers along the outline of it before closing the box and pushing it back into the corner where Kevin hid it. I stepped down off of the step stool and backed away from the shelf. I held the gun loosely in my hand.
"Whatchu got there," Lee asked from behind me. He walked up to me and pressed his body into my back. "Lee what the fuck are you doing," I questioned. I wanted to move, but something kept me there. Oliver ignored my question. "I see you brought out Assata," he crooned against my neck. His hands slid down my bare arms and found my hand now firmly gripping the handle of the gun. He placed his hand over mine and guided my arm into the air. "Remember when I taught you how to shoot," he whispered in my ear. My breathing was shallow and my heart was pounding loudly in my ears. Oliver placed a soft kiss on my neck followed by another. "I always thought you looked sexy holding a gun," he mumbled into my neck. I squeezed my eyes shut as if that would make him vanish into thin air. I put the gun down at my side and with my eyes still close, managed to force out four barely coherent words. "We can't do this," I said. My voice was soft and breathy. He didn't believe a word I said. In response he gently grazed my ear with his teeth. "Fuck," I panted faintly. Oliver chuckled a little, mostly to himself. He knew the affect he was having on me. Guns were sort of an erotic thing for us back when we were dating. His right arm snaked across my waist and pulled me tighter against his body. I could feel his throbbing sex rub up against me. I took slow deep breaths as I tried to maintain my composure against the weight of his body. Lee grabbed ahold of my left hand that still held the gun ever so lightly. He positioned his body behind mine to better assist with him guiding my hand to shoot like he used to do. He raised my arm up and aimed the gun at an empty wall in the closet. "That's it," he coached, "perfect." I held my position like he wanted me to while he slid his hands away from mine and rested them on my waist. He held me still and breathed me in. I found a spot on the wall to concentrate on to prevent myself from being further sucked into this time warp he had me in. "Girl, get it together," I said to myself. "You ain't no weak ass bitch."
"Don't you wanna just pull the trigger," he said gruffly in my ear. The lines became blurry. They always did when we were like this. I could never tell if he was talking about the gun or himself, but as Lee always did he assured me that he was talking about himself. This time he lowered my gun and guided my free hand behind me and down towards his crotch. I could feel his constrained desire pressing against me. I stood still against him. "Pull the trigger," he coaxed in my ear.
I closed my eyes. "You ain't no weak ass bitch," I said quietly to myself. "What was that," Lee asked. "I said," I stated loudly, "I ain't no weak ass bitch!" I elbowed him in his stomach before turning around and kneeing him in his crotch. He fell to his knees in front of me and without a second thought I pointed the gun at him. "Is this what you want," I said, my breathing still heavy. "For me to end your ass right here?"
Lee lifted up his hands in surrender. "Whoa. Lys. Chill out." I just stared at him. "Think about what you're doing." I moved in closer to him. He took a step back. "Alyssa. Put the gun down. We both know you ain't gon' shoot me. You ain't never shoot somebody before. Your aim isn't even that good."
"Like yours," I smirked. I continued to point the gun at him. "You always did think you taught me how to shoot," I grinned. "What you don't know is that I have perfect aim. I've been doing this since I was ten." I walked closer to Oliver. "Do you know the cardinal rule I was taught when learning how to shoot?" Oliver was silent. "I'll tell you," I smiled as I walked behind him. I leaned in close to him. "Don't miss," I whispered in his ear. I cocked the gun back and rubbed it against his neck. I squatted down behind him. "You see that doll sitting on the shelf over there?" I questioned. "My mom got it for me on my 8th birthday." I held up my gun and shot the doll in the head. He jumped. "You and my mom really hurt me Oliver. If I ever see you again that will be you," I said pointing to the now fallen doll. "And like that doll, I will. Not. Miss. Got it?"
"Yeah," he stammered. I shot the gun again.
"Get out!" I said frustratedly. "Get the fuck out!"
Oliver scurried to the front door. "And when you see my mama tell her I ain't the bitch to fuck with!" I yelled behind him. He bolted out of my apartment causing the door to slam back against the wall.
I walked back into my room and threw on a pair of sweats and a t-shirt. I quickly shoved my feet into a pair of sneakers. Still flustered from my encounter with Oliver, I grabbed my keys, phone and purse. I shoved Assata inside and walked out of my apartment.
I swiftly got into my car with the intention to go see my mom, but somehow I ended up in front of Terrance's apartment. I got out of my car with tears welling up in my eyes and headed in the direction of his home. Outside of his apartment I could hear laughter coming from inside. I knocked three times and after no response decided to leave. I was heading back towards my car when I heard a familiar voice call out to me. "Alyssa." I turned around and was shocked to see Kevin standing at the door.
...
