Love.
It is a beautiful word. One that is spoken so wonderfully about in poems and songs.
It is a beautiful feeling. One that is sparkling in the eyes of couples and is felt through their touches.
But every coin has two sides.
As much happiness at...
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~*~
"Under the flower petals raining down..."
~*~
The wedding card came in the mail a few days after my conversation with Tae. When he kept asking me to meet, I knew exactly why. He had come to know of my feelings and I could only avoid him for so long.
I had been afraid to meet up with him, afraid to see his reaction. Afraid of him hating me. Tae meant a lot to me and I couldn't fathom him having any ill feelings towards me.
However, I was surprised to say the least, to see him so understanding. He had merely wanted to know, he cared, and that meant the world to me. And I wasn't lying when I told him that I believed the two of them belonged, because they did. And I wanted them both to be happy.
Sighing, I drop my head to the desk, the paper before me sitting blank. It was close to midnight, my room illuminated only by my desk lamp, as I tried my hardest to figure something out for the best man speech. Of course when I had agreed to this, I didn't think it would be this hard.
The wedding was tomorrow and now I was cursing myself for having waited till the last minute to work on this. I had tried several times earlier in the week, but nothing came to mind.
Groaning, I pick up my head, glaring at the piece of paper before me as if it would help any. But nothing comes.
Slowly my eyes drift over my room, my chair swiveling around. Jin hyung and Namjoon hyung had cleaned up the mess I made spectacularly, no indication that I had trashed everything. I still couldn't get the words I said that day out of my mind, hating myself so much.
My eyes rest on a picture frame beside the one of me and Jimin as kids. Jin hyung had replaced the frame for that one, and the picture that had caught my attention was new.
It was taken at the engagement ceremony, the three of us: Jimin, Tae, and I, standing together. The both of them had huge smiles on their faces while I had the slightest hint of a smile, my eyes trained on them.
I smile, seeing the happy faces of Jimin and Tae, and I realize that's all I've ever wanted. I just wanted them to be happy, and if that was with each other, then I couldn't be happier.
This was life. We didn't always get what we wanted, no matter how much we wished for it, prayed for it, or begged for it. And that was alright. I know I needed to move on. Tomorrow the two of them would tie the knot and they'd live happily ever after.
The perfect fairytale.
And now it was time for me to go find my own. Every cell in my body wished my happy ending was Jimin, but that could never be. And I no longer wanted it to be, because that would mean I would rob Tae of his happy ending. And that is something I refused to do.
