groceries and crackheads- peter parker

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a cringey, fluffy crackshot

that makes no sense and

sucks but is cute anyway

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100% crackshot, unedited, full of cringe and very poorly written because I suck at writing. I'm sorry if the story seems really rushed towards the end haha

I'm most likely just gonna post the rest of my peter drafts, and possibly a Steve one afterwards to even out the numbers but thank you guys for sticking with me for so long! This has been absolutely insane

LOL its sad that I have almost 200 chapters yet only like 120k reads? tragic *insert crying kim kardashian face here*


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"Hey, Pete, where's Nat?" you waved at Peter, who was sitting on the couch with a bowl of Goldfish in his lap and watching Supernatural. "I haven't seen her since breakfast. Ooh, those are the flavor-blasted ones! Ooh, sour cream and onion! I'll take some."

"Oh, hey," he smiled, giving you a high-five as you took a handful of Goldfish and popped them into your mouth. "Think she's sparring with Mr. Stark in the training facility. Forgot which floor that was on. How many floors does this building even have?"

"I don't know," you shrugged, "I remember getting lost when I was ten and Dad spent an hour going up and down the place trying to look for me. Who knows where they could be."

"Well, you're welcome to binge-watch with me if you want," Peter offered, patting the empty spot next to him and you hopped over the couch and plopped down, hugging a pillow to your chest. "Things are just about to get interesting."

"Ooh, are you on the season finale?" Your eyes widened in excitement when he nodded. "Oh my god, Jensen Ackles is the man."

"I mean...I'm a Sam fan...so..." he shrugged. "But you aren't wrong on that one."

"But he's cute."

"Like, how cute?"

"Cuter than you," you smirked, and he punched you in the shoulder in response. "Ow! What, I can't have my fair share of celebrity crushes? At least they aren't as bad as Thor's Selena Gomez phase was."

The teenager visibly shuddered at that. "Oh god, no. I still know all the lyrics to almost all her songs, and I don't think I'm gonna forget them anytime soon."

"Pretty sure FRIDAY developed PTSD from having to replay Same Old Love over and over," you snorted, laying your head down in his lap, and it's a miracle he doesn't scream or that you can't hear his rapid heartbeat. "I barely got an hour of sleep that night."

"I didn't sleep at all."

"I PREFER SAFEWAY!"

"LUCKY'S IS BETTER!"

"SAFEWAY PREVAILS!"

"SAFEWAY AND LUCKY'S BOTH SUCK! LET'S JUST GO TO TARGET, TONY!"

You groaned and rubbed your eyes, Peter turning the TV remote off and turning his head to look at the chaotic scene unfolding behind him. Sam, Bucky, and Clint were arguing over what supermarket to go to...and it wasn't a pretty sight.

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