adore you // [h.s]

32

Audrey

Another twelve hour flight had me completely exhausted. I let Harry use me as a pillow the entire flight because I knew how hard he had been working. Poor baby barely slept because he was so excited to film that music video.

"Stay close to me." Harry whispered to me.

I felt his arm hook around my body to keep me close to him. He had been extremely protective over me ever since that day at Beachwood Cafe, but I didn't mind. No one has ever cared about me enough to protect me, so it felt good knowing he was protecting me.

Harry and I didn't speak much as we walked through the airport, he was eager to get out of there. Paparazzi were snapping pictures of us as we walked, but they weren't getting close. They made sure that they stayed at least fifteen or twenty feet away from us.

"How was your trip?" .. "Where'd you go, Harry?" .. "How's your girlfriend?".. "Who is she, Harry?"

I couldn't help but roll my eyes as we continued to walk. I could still hear them following us as we made our way to the car. Before I even realized, I stuck my middle finger up in the air. Harry looked over and chuckled before he copied my actions.

"This is why you're my girl," Harry whispered before he kissed the side of my head.

Harry and I crawled into his convertible with tired eyes. I looked at the dash clock, 3:51 am. I let out a large yawn, making myself comfortable in the passenger seat.

"Are you coming home with me?" Harry asked as we started to drive.

"I promised mom that I would spend a couple of nights at home with her after I got back, but I'll stay with you tonight." He nodded. He propped himself on the door.

"Hey," I stayed which pulled all his attention to me for a second, "I never really thanked you for the other night on the beach."

He furrowed his brows at me, "Why would you thank me?"

"No one has ever been that gentle with me, so thank you." He looked at me only taking his eyes off the road for a split second. I could see the tears forming in his eyes, "I'm not really used to feeling safe whenever a guy touches me, and I felt so safe that night."

Harry stayed silent. I could tell that he was trying so hard to fight back the tears. He placed his hand on my thigh, rubbing circles into my skin.

Ever since I ran into him at the mall, my skin was burning. My body felt dirty and disgusting, no matter how many showers I took or how hard I scrubbed my skin. His touch burned scars into my skin that I thought would never go away again.

That night at the beach with Harry, he ran his fingers over my body and the burning stopped. All the filth disappeared from my skin, I felt clean. I felt free again. Harry's touch was so innocent and loving.

"M'Sorry." He apologizes while he clears his throat. "You deserve to feel safe and loved because you are." He didn't say much before his voice started to break. "Shit, M'Sorry. I'm trying not to cry." He wiped his face.

I wrapped my fingers in Harry's curl as I told him he didn't have to say anything. I told him that I was okay and I didn't mean to upset him.

Harry had such a fragile heart and it was something I always adored about him. His heart was too big for his body and I don't think he would ever realize that.

**

After I woke up, I hurried home to catch my mom before she left for work. I wanted to talk to her for a minute before she left and tell her about the trip minus the skinny dipping part, that would be awkward.

"Good morning!" I shouted as I walked into the house. My mother yelled a 'good morning' from her bedroom. I already knew she was running late for work. It was a Friday, she was almost always late on Fridays.

I walked into the kitchen and started brewing coffee for us. I pulled down her to-go mug, getting everything ready. I noticed that her papers weren't packed up either, so I began working on that.

"How was the trip?" She sounded frantic as she hurried into the kitchen. "Did you have fun?" I hummed.

"I packed up your papers and the coffee is brewing," I said as I took a seat at the kitchen table.

I looked to the floor and saw her overnight bag packed and ready to go. I frowned before I looked up to her. I couldn't believe that she offered to take a job after she asked me to stay with her.

"I'm sorry, I couldn't pass up this case." She apologized whenever she noticed me staring at her bag. Little did she know, I was trying to light a fire with my eyes but I had been proven to be unsuccessful.

"Not a big deal." I shrugged.

I loved my mom and she was always going to be my best friend, but she has a tendency to do this. She'll make a big deal about never seeing me, make plans to hang out with me, then bail. She's been doing it ever since I was eighteen.

I will never forget the time she tried to ground me because I was going out too much. She claimed she missed me and she had been feeling so disconnected from me, but the next day she took a case. She went away for nearly two weeks.

"We'll do something whenever I get back." I nodded.

Moments later, my mother grabbed her things and left. She would be gone for almost a month to work on this case. I wasn't going to lie, my feelings were hurt. I was looking forward to spending a little bit more time with her, but it was entirely my fault for getting my hopes up.

A tiny piece of me held onto hope that we would get to catch up whenever she got done with this case. I wanted to fill her in on all things Harry Styles because it's a lot.

I thought about messaging Kai, but he is always busy with his girlfriend. I never thought Kai and I would grow apart, but then we grew up. I've made sure to check in on him, but I'm not going to suffocate him. Kai has never been this happy with a girl, and there's been a lot of girls coming in and out of his life.

me;
I miss you :(

styles;
I miss you, my sweet girl xx

me;
come see me?

styles;
see you soon xx

I smiled while I laid my phone back down on the table. I thought back to the day Mitch told me I had Harry wrapped around my finger. I thought Mitch was full of shit, but maybe just this one time he was right.

Harry would jump oceans for me and it's crazy to think that, but it's true. He spends most of his days making sure that I am happy and well-taken care of. I've never had this kind of love before. I have only had toxic love, never genuine love.

I let memories from a few years ago resurface. I don't know how I ever thought something so violent, vile, manipulative could be love. All the times I had to buy makeup just to cover the bruises, force myself to lay down with him, or hide that I was friends with Kai so he wouldn't be angry with me.

I could my body start to shake while the memories ran wild through my mind. I was too far gone to stop them now, I just had to wait it out. Eventually, it would all stop.

"Don't you ever speak to me that way again!" .. "A bit slutty, don't you think?" .. "Stop squirming." .. "Just lay down." .. "If I see you around him again, I'm going to beat the shit out of you." .. "You look fat in that, maybe you shouldn't wear it." .. "Don't embarrass me in front of my family." .. "Just sit there and shut up."

My body jerked whenever the front door closes, "Hey sweet girl." Harry smiled at me as he walked into the kitchen. I ran over to him and wrapped my body around his. You're just what I need to feel okay again.