new directions | glee

7. TALKING TO THE MOON ☑️

CHAPTER SEVEN |
talking to the moon

***

KAYLA WAS WALKING up to her lunch table when she saw Kurt grinning down at his phone and she immediately knew he was texting Blaine. She was actually really happy for him. Even if he and Blaine never became a couple, at least he had a friend who understood him. Kayla always tried to relate to Kurt's struggles, but she really couldn't. Their situations were completely different. Now Kurt had someone who really got him.

Kayla often wondered what it'd be like for her if she was exclusively into women. Of course she was much more female leaning, but it couldn't be denied that she was still attracted to men (even if she didn't want to be). Ever since she realized her sexuality, she always imagined that she'd marry a woman and ever since she and Rachel's first kiss, she'd been hoping to share a last name with the diva, but she recognized how naive that was of her.

Breaking out of her rather depressing thoughts, she forced a smile as she sat down next to Mercedes who was shoving tater tots down her throat and glaring at Kurt who had yet to come up from his phone.

Kayla cleared her throat to get his attention and slowly, he put his phone down. She chuckled, "Blaine?"

Kurt blushed slightly, nodding. "Yeah. We're going out to a Sound of Music singalong tonight."

Mercedes dropped her fork on her lunch tray suddenly. "We were supposed to have 'stix tonight."

Kurt frowned. "Oh. Well, we can just do it another night. Or you could come with me and Blaine."

Mercedes grimaced. "No thanks." She quickly got up to put her tray away, but the tension was lifted in the room now and Kurt was the only one oblivious to it.

"What's her problem?"

"Are you serious?" she questioned incredulously and he nodded in response. She sighed, "You've kinda been ditching her to hang out with Blaine, babe. She's lonely. She misses her best friend."

Kurt slumped back in his chair, arguing, "Well maybe I'm lonely too. Blaine is the first person to really understand what I'm going through and I'm not lonely when I'm with him."

"I'm sure he's great and I'm so happy that you've made a friend who understands your situation. Just don't blow off your other friends because of it. Before Blaine, I was that friend and you haven't spoken to me in weeks." Kayla hinted, placing her hand on top of his.

He quickly yanked his hand away and stood up. "You're pan. You'll never understand me." Only seconds later, he stormed away.

She knew he was hurt, but he didn't need to hurt her in the process. Her situation would never be the exact same as his, but before this moment, she thought Kurt respected her and her preference. Who even was he anymore?

She tried to push back the tears and quickly threw her food away. She hadn't eaten much, but she didn't really feel up to eating right now. She walked over to the auditorium. She needed to sing. The auditorium was empty, but the grand piano sat in the middle of the stage. She played with the keys a little bit before she sat down and started the intro to the song she was playing.

< talking to the moon, bruno mars >

"I know you're somewhere out there. Somewhere far away. I want you back. I want you back. Neighbors think I'm crazy, but they don't understand. You're all I had. You're all I had."

Kayla felt the notes flow through her as she played along with the keys. Eventually she found herself lost in the music and her thoughts. Everything that had happened in the past year was running through their fingers as she jammed along to the song. She felt the tears come streaming down as she thought about a number of her problems—the first being that Kurt didn't recognize that being pansexual didn't keep her from harrassment and the second being that her heart felt a bit heavier each time she saw Finn and Rachel kissing.