skinny love | barry allen

43

"Zee, please." Jay walked around the chair I sat in, "I'm trying to help you."

I didn't say anything.

My hand held the arm that was clamped with a cuff, a new and much stronger dampener on my wrist after my outburst at Star Labs had caused the other one to break.

"What did you do to me?" My voice was low, looking up at Jay with complete hatred, "What was that back at Star Labs?-"

"That wasn't me- that was you." Jay looked slightly pleased, stopping in front of me, "That darkness? It's always been inside of you, but- you never let it come out of the cage, no matter how bad things god- losing Barry was the last straw for you, I suppose-"

He was the only thing keeping me together.

My voice was quiet, tears pooling in my eyes, staring down at him, "Is he really dead?"

"Yes." Jay's voice lowered, "He's dead, Zee."

I looked down, hugging myself, a small sob leaving my lips, the tears in my eyes falling, quietly crying to myself.

"Zee- I know it's sad." Jay got up and placed a hand on my back, rubbing it slow, "But- you have me- and that's all that you need-"

"God, don't touch me-" I got up, taking a few steps away from him, tears streaming down my cheeks.

"Why not?" Jay stares, "What is it?"

I stare at him in disbelief, my voice barely there, "How do you just- do that?"

Jay stood straight, "Do what?"

"Act like you haven't done anything wrong- as if I'm not upset over something that you did." I took a step back, "Do you even know how much you've ruined my life?"

Jay swallows hard, "What?"

"It's like you can't comprehend how much you messed things up for me because you think you're doing good by me." I dropped my arms to my side, anger burning in my chest, "Barry wouldn't have done that if you hadn't taken his speed- if you hadn't kidnapped Wally, and if Barry wasn't dead right now, I wouldn't be- turning evil-"

"It's for your own good-" Jay took a few steps closer to me, "I'm just trying to get you to understand who you really are- I- I want my sister-"

"Your sister is dead, Jay- and by your own hand." I raised my voice at him lightly, "You kidnapped me- you killed my brother-"

"Please calm down and try to understand." Jay grabs my arm, "I am your brother-"

"You are not my brother." I ripped my arm out of his touch, "Stop trying to force yourself to be-"

"I am your brother- I am!" Jay suddenly runs, grabbing me by the neck and slamming me into the wall, "I only did what I had to do to ensure I stayed alive- to ensure that it was only you and me. Everything I've done is for you- to ensure that you and I can rule- together- how it used to be-"

"Look at yourself, Jay!" I croaked out, my hands holding his wrist, trying to loosen his tight grip around my neck, "It's only a matter of time before you kill me the way you killed her-"

Jay drops me onto the ground at my words, as I held my throat, coughing lightly, gasping for air as he took a few steps back from me.