Twisted and Torn (afi/lrh)

Boose and Betrayals

Britain's POV

Tonight was a bad night. I was craving Luke. I wanted to feel his body pressed to mine, feel his arms wrapped around my waist, hear his beautiful voice tell me he loved me.

I just wanted him back, but I knew it was impossible.

I had to do something to get him off my mind. First, I tried turning to music.

I realized, though, that all of the music I had was songs by the boys. Hearing Luke sing made me miss him even more. I couldn't listen to them.

I turned Pandora on and Tove Lo's Habits came on.

You're gone and I gotta stay
High all the time
To keep you off my mind
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
High all the time
To keep you off my mind
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh
Spend my days locked in a haze
Trying to forget you babe
I fall back down
Gotta stay high all my life
To forget I'm missing you
Ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh

Maybe that's the answer. Maybe getting drunk will take my mind off of Luke.

But, what would Michael say? Michael would disapprove.

Michael had a past with alcohol. He has only recently stopped drinking as much.

I turned the song off. I had to stop those ideas from flowing into my head.

I went down to the basement which was oddly empty because Ash's drums weren't here neither were Mikey, Cal, or Luke's guitars. Every piece of them was gone.

That's when I remembered. Kristoff! Maybe he can distract my thoughts of Luke.

I run back upstairs and grab the little ball of sunshine.

I grab him from his kennel and take him to the basement. I grab one of his tennis balls as well.

We get down to the basement, and I put down the little dog.

"Do you want to play, Kristoff?" I say in a high voice.

He wags his tail in a yes. I throw his ball, but he just sits there wagging his tail. He seemed very uninterested in his toy.

He whimpered and stood up against my legs. He just wanted to cuddle. He was so much like Luke. I scooped him once again and plopped down on the couch.

I had put in a movie already. I turned it on and cuddles with Kristoff.

Half way in, I realized I hadn't been paying attention at all. My thoughts were consumed by Luke.

Kristoff had long fallen asleep. He proved to be little help with my problem.

At this point, I needed alcohol. I had to drown my thoughts before they drowned me.

***********

It had been a few hours since I decided alcohol was my answer, but I had been stalling. I wanted to do it, but I didn't need to. It wouldn't be healthy.

Second, how was I going to get it? I was only 17. Way under age. If Ash were here, he could get it, or at least talk his way into getting it. He was good at that sort of thing.

I did know someone that could get it, but it wasn't a good idea for me to call them, but I needed that alcohol.

I dug through my clothes and found the napkin.

I quickly dialed the number. This was such a bad idea.

"Hello?" I heard the all too familiar voice say.