Spencer Reid: Oneshots

Smoother Than Teflon?

Summary: Where Emily attempts to help Spencer flirt with the girl at the front desk, emphasis on attempts.

"Spencer."

The boy was completely distracted, looking at something else.

"Spencer?" Emily whistled. "Spencer."

He snapped out of his trance, looking at her. "What?"

Emily furled her brows. "What are you looking at?"

"Nothing, nothing." He forced his head down, looking at a pile of papers.

Emily raised an eyebrow, walking over and standing behind him. Her eyes scanned the area near the coffee machine and finally saw it. "Oh, I see." A girl was standing there, talking to another agent while smiling and laughing.

"I-It isn't—"

"Someone's got a little workplace crush," she teased.

"I do not!"

"Do too."

"You're acting like a child."

"And you're such a man? You can't even admit you think she's pretty."

"Well—"

"So you don't think she's pretty?"

"I didn't say that!"

"So she is?"

"Yes, okay! She's beautiful...actually."

Emily grinned. "I've been waiting for some office drama." She pulled over her chair. "Alright, welcome to the Prentiss School of Love."

"No offense, but I don't think you're the most qualified to teach me."

"Nonsense, I'm an expert."

"You said your boyfriend was your cat."

"I did not."

"Eidetic."

"Damn you." Emily exhaled. "I'm helping you."

"Why?"

"Because I feel like it!"

Spencer furled his brows. "Right..."

"Time for phase 1..."

"I can't do this."

"Yes, you can."

Spencer turned around. "Believe me, I can't."

"Just say what we practiced."

He inhaled. "Okay, got it. Say what we practiced."

"No statistics or facts!"

"Okay..." He adjusted his tie, walking to the desk.

The girl smiled up at him. "Dr. Reid, what can I do for you?"

Why can't I speak? "I-I uh you uh your...my uh...I like your hair."

She looked slightly confused. "Thank you..."

"I like the way you parted it." He recalled Derek using a line like that and then finishing it with in fact, I like all your parts.

"It's just a middle part but thanks." She smiled awkwardly.

"I like all of your parts?" That sounded way cooler from Derek.

The girl looked utterly confused then began to laugh quietly. "Smoother than butter."

"Actually, butter isn't that smooth in comparison to other things. Harvard recently discovered a biochemical that could be the smoothest substance known to man. It could even rival Teflon."

She smirked. "Smoother than Teflon."

He couldn't talk again. Emily quickly walked over. "Uh we have a case! Bye!" She dragged him off.

"What?"

"That was a train wreck."

"Oh..." She laughed though.

After a week of failed attempts similar to the first one, Emily had given up. "It's hopeless."

Spencer shrugged. "I'm just not good with this kind of thing."

Emily exhaled. "I'll get you a cat."

"I'm good...I think I'm just gonna head out."

"Alright, bye, Reid."

He waved, slinging his bag over his shoulder and taking the elevator downstairs. Spencer made his way to the door.

"Teflon."

He stopped, turning around. "Hey, Y/N."

She smiled, walking over. "Is Prentiss here?"

"Uh no, why?"

"It was getting hard to watch you trying to follow her pickup lines."

"Wait, wait, wait. You knew?!"

She burst out laughing. "Of course I did! I don't really think you're a pickup line guy."

He chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck. "I'm not."

"Spencer, if you like me, you can just tell me."

"I-I was worried you would think I'm a little weird and—"

"Weird? If I'm being honest, your point about Teflon was the most normal thing you said."

He smiled to himself. "I do like you. A lot. I should've just told you and not creeped you out with all of that Emily stuff...I'm sorry."

The corners of her lips turned upwards. "Do you wanna get dinner? I know a good Chinese place down the street."

"Really?"

"Mhm."

"I-I would really like that." He couldn't stop his dopey grin from forming.

"Did Emily really think those would work?" She joked, grabbing her bag, following him out the door.

"I'm not sure..."

Emily peeked her head out from behind a concrete pillar and smirked. "Mission accomplished."