Spencer Reid: Oneshots

The Reunion

Summary: Spencer attends a high school reunion but ends up not being too mad about it.

"Spencer, please!"

The man groaned, closing his book. "Penelope, you have plenty of men, and women might I add, in your 'DMs'. Please ask one of them."

"Spencer," Penelope whined. "I don't know much about them beyond how good they are in bed—"

"Dear God, do not finish that sentence," Spencer interjected. "Well, a 10 year high school reunion is a great place to get to know someone."

Penelope pursed her lips. "I don't like sassy Spencer."

"And sassy Spencer has work to do so please, I beg, let him work." He flashed a very cheesy smile.

"Reid, I swear—"

Spencer swiveled in his chair. "Why do you even need a date so bad? It's just high school."

"Exactly! These people need to see that I'm hot, successful, and dating a sexy genius."

He scoffed. "So you're bringing me of all people because I'm, and I quote, a sexy genius?"

"Precisely."

Spencer paused. "You grew up in San Francisco, didn't you?"

"Yes..."

"I have a deal for you."

Penelope grinned. "Go on!"

"I've always wanted to see the American Bookbinders Museum, so—"

The woman looked mortified. "I'm sorry. You hear San Francisco and think of a bookbinding museum? Geez, you are such a nerd."

"Do you want me to fake date you, Garcia?"

She cleared her throat. "Yes, go on. Sorry."

"Anyways. You take me to the museum and buy my food, and I'll go."

"Deal!"

Spencer grinned. "To San Francisco we go."

The pair entered the high school auditorium and were immediately greeted with less-than-enthusiastic students offering them pictures.

"No thank—"

"Yes, please!" Penelope squealed. "Come on, Reid."

Spencer sighed, thinking of the museum to keep himself sane.

"Say Porpoise," the teenager at the camera murmured.

"Porpoiseeeeee," the two said in unison.

The boy handed them a copy of the photo. "10 bucks."

Spencer raised an eyebrow. "For a picture?"

"10 bucks."

Penelope rolled her eyes, handing him the bill. "Have a good one—he's gone."

"Porpoise?"

"We're the Bay Area porpoises! Of course."

Spencer looked around. "So, who was who at your high school?"

"What do you mean?"

"Which of these balding men was the football captain?" Spencer snickered. "My money is on the one wearing the literal school football jersey—which certainly does not fit anymore—underneath his suit jacket."

Penelope covered her mouth, choking back laughter. "Yep, that's him. Clark Kelley." She pulled out her phone, handing it to Spencer after typing quickly. "Compare that to his mugshot."