In Another Life

Chapter 134/ Levi POV

Levi POV

It was late, really late. I had put the girls to bed hours ago. Kaneki and Maya had moved out a few months ago, I ended up taking over their room.

After a few months had passed I realized I wasn't the happiest about the sleeping arrangements. I wanted be sleep with Y/N, not down the hall from her where I was nowhere near.

Anzia was passed out in Y/N's arms as her head hung, she too was passed out. They both were kicked back in the rocking chair, snoring as the fireplace raged on.

I had covered them a hour ago with a blanket. I assumed she would have woken, I guess not.

I got up off the couch making my way over to her. I brought my hand up pushing her forhead back, so her head was resting right. I'm sure her neck would be killing her tomorrow.

Anzia stirred in her arms, kicking his small legs out of the blanket. He always ran hot just like his mother they were both walking heaters.

I reached down, pulling him gently from her arms.
He needed to be put to bed and changed. I'm sure Y/N could use the sleep too. She was next.

After wrapping Anzia tightly in a blanket I close the my bedroom door, I'd keep him with me tonight. Allow Y/N her rest.

I almost tip toed out to the living room where she remained in the chair. Head hanging again, it must have fallen forward when I put Anzia down.

I came to her side kneeling. Her arm was hanging off the rest. Ring still on her finger, she wore them both still. The wedding band and engagement ring.

I liked that more then I allowed her to know. I wanted things to be back to normal. I wanted to take back every word I said, that wasn't me. I was confused and only knew one side. I made a impulse decision. One I'd regret forever.

Over the past year Y/N had pulled away entirely. There was no guilt trip. No mourning. No begging for me back, no side looks. Nothing, she shut down completely. I couldn't even tell if she was upset if she ever was.

It made it impossible to find d a way in. She didn't want me anymore, I had caused to much damage unknowingly.

I wanted her though, I didn't care if she didn't want me. I wanted to be selfish, force her to be mine and try. Just give me one chance to show her I remember now and that I was wrong. I was so wrong.

I felt like apart of her felt the same way. The ring was still there, right?

I hoped she'd never take it off, I hope it's the first thing Shane sees when she walks in on her lessons. I constant reminder that she is not his to touch, only mine.

It was getting to me, really getting me to. She was so distant I found it hard not to snoop around, follow her.... Go through her things. She hadn't bought any new lingerie in awhile, I knew all her pieces I just wanted...... I wanted to know if she .. if.. if she was sleeping with someone else. Letting another man between her legs. The very thought made me want to vomit.

I didn't want that to happen. I wanted her to be left untouched, alone. Until she'd allow me back in. Selfish I know, I didn't care.

My fingers found hers, intertwining them as I slowly brought her hand to my lips.

This was the only time I could be somewhat intimate with her. When she was asleep. I felt pathetic, but I felt physically sick with the distance between us. I couldn't eat or sleep. I was growing ill because of it.

I just needed a little, something to keep me going.

Each finger tip was kissed gently all the way to her scarred wrists.