lee minho : insecurities

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TW: insecurities, fat shaming and self harm!!
if you're uncomfortable with atleast one of these topics, pls skip the chapter!! :)

You ran inside the bathroom while tears streamed down your cheeks.

You immediately locked the bathroom door before standing infront of the mirror above the sink.
You stared at yourself, wondering why you looked so horrible and started to doubt your entire existence.

I'm so fat.

I can't even believe Minho is dating me.

He deserves someone so much better and skinnier.

More hurtful words we're taking over your thoughts.
You forced yourself to think that Minho deserves someone better than you. Someone who's prettier. Someone who's skinnier. Someone who's taller. Someone who was just overall perfect.

Ever since Minho revealed his relationship with you in public, alot of people supported the relationship. But of course, haters will always hate.

Lately, some people have been throwing comments at you saying that you've gained some weight.

"Um no offense but, doesn't Y/N look a little fat?"

"What was Minho thinking? Did he just really date someone who looks like... that? LOLOLOL."

"Minho deserves someone so much better!!"

"Minho blink twice if you need help."

"Why tf is Minho in a relationship with Y/N? She seriously looks ugly..."

"Y/N is SO way out of Minho's league."

Those we're the comments you saw often.
Minho was very aware of this but you insisted that it didn't hurt you at all and haters always gonna hate.

At first it didn't have an impact on you but now, those words cut deep and sharp like a knife.

The comments we're too much.

You grew more insecure as time passes by, and it was eating you up slowly and painfully in the inside.

You kept staring at the mirror, cursing at yourself for looking like that.

You've considered breaking up with Minho just because the whole situation.

You didn't bother to shut up, you we're alone in the house anyways. Your screams and cries of pain could be heard echoing around the room.

You we're a crying mess.

You weakly reached for the sharp knife you hid under the drawers.

You created bleeding scratches on your stomach with no hesitation. You cried during the entire process. Watching the sharp blade pierce through your skin ever so slowly while blood slowly starts to come through the cuts was painful.

You never thought you'd do this to yourself.

The knife had a few drops of blood on it.

The door unexpectedly swung open which revealed Minho.

He stood there in absolute shock. He never thought you would do this to yourself either. He hates it when you're in pain, it always makes him emotional. So just seeing the love of his life hurting himself/herself on purpose due to painful words shattered him emotionally.

Your panicked eyes met his shocked and worried ones.

You quickly threw the knife on the floor while pulling down your shirt to try and hide the bleeding scars.

But it was too late and he already saw the whole thing happen.

"Mi-minho..."

Minho didn't waste time and broke down crying infront of you. He quickly ran to you and hugged you tight. His head buried in your neck and his tears soaked your shirt.

Everthing happened so fast you didn't know how to react except to finally break down too.

He quickly pulled away and lifted your shirt up to reveal the bleeding scars you made, scattered all over.

He cries even more from the horrible sight.

He swiftly took out the first aid kit in the small cabinet above the mirror. He took a towel and soaked it with water and lifted your shirt up again as he starts to clean your cuts. His hands we're shaking from crying too much too.

All you could do was stand there let him clean your cuts, mumbling "i'm sorry" over and over again.

"I-i'm so sorry... all of this m-must've hurt alot hm?" He said shaking, he finished cleaing your cuts and looked at the white towel who was now stained with blood.

He also quickly treats your cuts and started to stick bandaids ontop of the scars.

He threw the towel on the sink and hugged you tight.

"I'm sorry... I-i should've done something about it... I didn't know y-you would be hurting this mu-much." His breath was shaky and so was yours.

"I-it's not your fault Mi-minho... there's no need to b-be sorry." You paused. "I-i'm so sorry... I'm sorry for bringing you into this situation when I sh-should be dealing with it myself. You don't deserve any of this Minho..." You weakly said. Minho shook his head aggressively, strongly disagreeing with what you just said.

"No, you shut the fuck up right now, you're the most beautiful person I've ever laid my eyed on. I don't care what those people think about our relationship nor what their negative impressions about your appearance. You're perfect to me. You're so fucking gorgeous Y/N, not just your looks, I love everything about you Y/N, I hope you'll never forget that."

You struggled to respond. You know if you say something bad about yourself again he'll straight up tell a whole essay about it.

"I want you to tell me all of your problems okay? I'm not letting you suffer through this alone, I'm not gonna bare to see you like this again. Now go wash up oka- no actually, no. I'll join you, who knows what you'll do in here without me right after you just absolutely went crazy with that knife to yourself."

Idk why I keep writing these emotional stuff that include lots of triggering things. I'm also sorry if this sucks sm it's cos I'm in a hurry. So ye, that's all, bye :3

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