The Black Dragon Emperor (High School DxD X Male reader)

Chapter 19

Xenovia never actually liked heights. Even if she could come out as a fearless or monotonous person which that latter part was partially true, she actually didn't enjoyed heights.

In fact she hated them... But now, it was different.

The height she witnessing actually... made her feel some sort of... peace? Maybe

She was looking intensely down as she was at the edge of a building. Her gaze was lifeless even more than usual, no trace of shine on her brown eyes.

The ground that was several feet away from her seemed... so.. Peacefully, it called her.

Jump. That was what she wanted to do. To leap off the building and just... let the Death take her away.

Indeed. Lost. She felt lost as if she was a lost child that got lost from her mother.

The breeze of the cold night brushed against her skin making some shivers ran through her body. Little she minded it though.

She couldn't feel anything or better said she didn't cared about anything.

Xenovia eyed the holy sword she had on her. Durandal.

She sacrificed so much for her ideals and devotion to God... but it turned out that the illusion of an Almighty and Benevolent God was no more. God was death.

Her hand loosened the grip of her sword as it fell down on the ground she was standing on.

A breath left her as she made a step forward eager to just put an end to all.

Suicide was against the commandments of the Bible, but did that even matter anymore? There was no God, he was Dead. So there it wasn't no meaning to it. The Bible was insignificant by now so the commandments.

Xenovia took the luxury to watch the city below her.. be itself.

The lights of the city, the people doing their usual things, the cars running everywhere. It was... pretty.. to say the least.

However she found no joy on witnessing the humans do their lives. Everyone was going to die... and at the contrary of what she believed for various years God wasn't going to receive you with open arms and tell you with a warm smile "Come, my child"

Fairytale. That's how it sounded by now that she knew the truth.

She hoped to say that life was fun until it lasted but that would be a lie. Her life wasn't fun, being an Exorcist wasn't as how people thought it to be. It was abrasive, the Church in general was like that.

A humorless chuckle left her when the thought of church came to her head.

Now Church was futile. No holy blessings lied over the structures. They were now simple structures of human craftsmanship.

Although Kokabiel said that Michael was still taking care of Heaven.. but it wasn't the same. She believed in God not the Angels. Although if she believed in God she had to also believe in the things that surrounded his circle... But it wasn't the same as previously stated.

Christianity was about God, a Creator not about any replacement.

But she couldn't help but to wonder... if she committed this sin abhorred by the bible... Did her soul was going to be sent straight to Hell? Or maybe that too was a lie. Maybe the souls of the dead doesn't go anywhere as the writing usually stated, no heaven nor hell... maybe the souls just stay there haunting aimlessly.

Or maybe... such things as souls weren't even a thing.

It didn't mattered anymore. She already made her decision.