Sticky Shattered Glass Pieces

Chapter 49-A Little Help

It is time for me to leave, for good. What was going on inside of me at that time was difficult, from the way you behaved it must have been painful. Yet there are times I must protect the self, protect my own heart and soul if the damage from someone is too much. I wanted to walk with Suga through any and every storm, but it was akin to trying to hold a toddler who scratched and bit for years whilst alone. And though I tried, he broke me, literally, in pieces. So I'm taking this rebuilt version of myself. 

Into the black heavens, upon this clear night, comes the grace of a white-gold moon. Moonlight traveled through the night with graceful ease, lightening the rising path. The night was a special kind of blackness, the kind that wants only to hold the stars and help them to shine all the brighter. It was a warm black that hugged you no matter what, and within its safety, I could feel my own soul all the more clearly, that innocent inborn spark. 

Frost grew over the windows even as the duvet kept me warm. I watched the ice crystals grow for a while, allowing my brain to be empty, content to exist and be. The morning would bring the beauty of the ice for sure, that crunch under the boot and the bold greeting cold air brings. Yet between now and watching my breaths rise as new white-puffed clouds there will be a very cold night. The kind that only stops at the doors of the well-made houses. 

I waited for AgustD to show up in the forest before I took off into the portal in front of me. I waited so long for this day and it was a full moon that day. The portal opened up in front of me and I looked back to see if AgustD would appear and send me off for good. There were no signs of him, so, I sighed in disappointment and hurt before I stepped into the portal. I knew I will not be able to turn back and wait a little longer for AgustD. I took a deep breath and gathered my courage as I walked into the portal slowly. 

"Calm down. You are doing this for Suga. You love him and you want him to survive," I told myself as I stood in the portal. 

I bounded over the tufted grass and over the brow of the hill, but instead of letting my limbs gather speed all the way to the creek I stopped as if my feet were magnetized to the field. There in the middle of the grassy expanse was the most pointless gate in the world, a six feet tall, iron, with curls on it's curls and a top. 

On either side there was no fence at all, it's blackened catch dangled in mid-air as if resting on some unseen barrier. It was some kind of joke! Excellent! I rushed on it like the last iced buns at the market and lifted the latch. About now someone should reveal themselves, but they didn't. It swung forwards with a creak as if it were mounted on hinges. I took out my phone looking at the time. Then I walked right though and turned back. I would have seen no gate at all, an empty field, with the hedgerow taller. 

A billion verdant wands of pine wave in arboreal air because for this place is magical, so much so that I could feel it from core to finger tips. Suddenly, I came across something unusual and it was the magic mirror. I have read about this magic mirror and I know that it would reflect your inner self within you from the mirror. The magic mirror showed me the nothingness of emotional indifference eating away at my reflection, editing a little at a time, replacing the innocent me with a cruel monster who held the mask.

"What you are looking at is your true self now. Don't deny it or you will suffer the consequences," a familiar voice huffed from my back.

I turned around and was stunned by his handsome looks. He was the kind of handsome that got into my bones, that spoke to me of olden times before he'd said a word. He was handsome from the depth of his eyes to the gentle expressions of his voice. He was handsome from his generous opinions to the touch of his hand upon my own. I loved the way his voice quickened when he sparkled when he spoke softly to me. 

"How is that I have seen you before but I cannot place you in my mind," I was bewildered by my own thoughts.

"Perhaps," he looked at me with a warm smile on his face, "in another world." 

"That's not what I meant," I said, my voice implying I was retreating, withdrawing.

"Don't beat yourself up. You came this far for your love, that is all that matters now," he said, clearly wanting to control my retreat, too.

"I don't need your help or anyone's help. I can handle this myself," I glowered at him suspiciously. 

"I am your friend and I can help you. I am stuck in this world for 6 years and I was told a beautiful young lad would bring you back to my world," he continued calmly.

"Bring you back to your world? I am finding for mine and I have no time to find yours. I am sorry, you have to get there yourself," I apologized to him.

"I can see why Min Suga loves you. Your attitude and your personality attracts people even if they are harsh and wild," he sniggered.

"Min Suga? How do you know Min Suga?," I was puzzled again.

"I know you too. I promise you that I would tell you everything I know," he reassured me.

I was going to refuse his request, but relented. Something about him calmed me down. If his world is the same as mine, what harm would I face by letting a stranger follow me back. It was strange that he knew Suga's name and how I was related to Suga. I didn't want to engage in any sort of conversation with this handsome stranger as my thoughts were all jumbled up with Rachel's red diamond necklace. 

As soon as I reached the exits of the portal, I turned back at him and to my surprise, he was gone. I looked around for him but I it was in vain. So, I decided to leave him behind and walk through the forest alone. Luckily it was still bright when I reached my world from the portal and the forest wasn't gloomy or dark. From the rich brown earthen hues of the forest ground to the sweetness of the blue-white sky, the forest is a three dimensional wonderland for the eyes who are willing to absorb the light.

In this forest I am with my tribe of wood and leaf, among the giants who's roots hug the earth. It is a place of ancient souls, of the creatures who dwell with the sweet sounds of moving water and bird song. Somehow this is more home than home, perhaps one day I'll learn why. I walked out from the forest and encountered the fencing that avoids people from the outside to trespass the forest. Little that these people know there was a huge hole cut out through the fencing and some teenagers have been sneaking around at night for their entertainment after school. 

The sunshine that day was as the sweetest of desserts, the kind that bring a small leap of joy to the heart. And so at first I needed the smallest of nibbles, to squint, until I was ready to take in the vibrant summer day. I took out my phone and called Ashley, thinking she would be happy to see me. Just then, I got her voicemail and I thought I might drop at her place to surprise her instead. 

Just as I walked towards her house which was just around the corner from the forest, I noticed her house was crowded but she was no where to be seen. Then I spotted her boyfriend, Ray Delgado coming out from her house, sobbing. My heart started beating fast as I saw him crying as he looked back into Ashley's house. I was hoping that they have had a fight and not what I was dreading of. 

"Ray!" I waved at him, "Here!"

He looked up at me and rushed towards me. He wiped off his tears and gave me a faint smile. As he came closer, he pulled me into his arms and hugged me tightly. I knew he was happy to see me but why was he still sobbing? 

"I am happy to see you. Ashley would have been very excited too but she-," he cried and stammered.

"She what, Ray?" I looked at him curiously.

He shook his head in denial and tried to calm down but I was being impatient with his behavior. So, I looked at him back and shook him hard to tell me what was going on.

"Ray Delgado! You better tell me what-," I halted when I heard him, "Ashley is dead! She is gone! She left us all!"