Dazai x reader one shots

Incapable Of Love

Dazai looks at the newbie with a straight expression. Obviously he's sizing her up but would give her the benefit of the doubt.
"Osamu are we gonna go do that mission Ougai sent us on?"
"Don't ever use my first name. Got it?"
"Nope." She cocks her gun and puts it in the back of her pants, her jacket hiding the weapon, just like the brunette.
The said man clenches his fists but follows the woman.

Over the course of their time working together (Y/n) developed a crush on the suicidal maniac.
Of course she hides it, perfectly in fact, so no one knows.
Especially the man himself.
Dazai remains his usual stoic self and only smiles when he's around Oda or maybe when something amuses him.
(Y/n) loved his ability to remain professional.

She didn't want to believe it but she soon came to realize he would never love her back.
Unrequited love.
He hardly pays her any mind, unless she messes up, which is exceedingly rare.
She does little things to spend time with him but he doesn't notice.

Dazai couldn't feel emotions properly, not in his line of work.
Throughout his life he learned "love" is an empty concept.
All he needed was a beautiful woman to commit a double suicide.
At one point he considered asking (Y/n) but quickly dismissed the idea.
She has plenty of life to live.
Before Oda died he convinced Dazai to leave the mafia and seek out a love, even offering (Y/n) as an option.
The brunette rolled his eyes and ignored the last part of his request.

Years pass after Dazai leaves the mafia and his life seemed to have flipped upside down.
(Y/n) remained in the mafia and tried to forget her feelings.
The brunette and his blonde partner walk toward a crime scene when they strike up a conversation.
"Have you ever been with someone Dazai? Someone you haven't asked to commit a double suicide."
(Y/n), for some reason pops into mind.

Just as he's thinking of her, she walks past.
Her hair is past her hips.
She's wearing a skin-tight dress and heels.
A handbag under her arm.
Her eyes are sharp and his heart races.
What happened to her?
Dazai puts his hands in his pockets. "Little mystery, what are you doing?"
The woman stops in her tracks, and slowly turns.
"I'm offended you didn't recognize me. I don't look that different do I?"
(Y/n) walks up to the man and now they're the same height. "Osamu you look exactly the same. But you left and I won't forgive you for not saying goodbye."

Kunikida looks between them, confused. "Are you his ex-girlfriend?"
"Ha! I wish. Osamu doesn't know how to love. I learned that a long time ago. No matter how much I tried I was never good enough to receive his attention, let alone his affection."
Dazai looks at the woman confused. "You loved me?"
"You couldn't tell? I guess I really am a great actress. I hid my feelings for you because I knew you didn't feel the same way. But that didn't stop me from wanting to spend time with you."

Now the blonde wanted to cut himself from this conversation.
"Let me take you out for dinner. I've changed and maybe I can return your feelings now."
Both the blonde and (h/c) laugh.
"Dazai you're a suicidal maniac. You don't want love. You just want a beautiful woman to die with you." The ability user comments.
"If you would've asked me I would've said yes."
"You had too much life to live. I couldn't ask you." Dazai shakes his head and looks away quickly.

"I left the mafia because of a promise. Now maybe I can fulfill that promise fully."
"You wanna go to dinner? Fine. But you have to pay." (Y/n) crosses her arms.
Dazai looks her up and down. "Are you gonna wear this?"
"God no! I'm on a mission right now. Mori picked it out for me. I would never wear this of my own free volition."
Dazai nods in agreement. "If I remember you wear suits."
"Not since you left. I only wore them so you would think I was professional. I wear whatever I'm in the mood for unless I'm on a job."

Dazai smirks and hands her his card. "Text me your address and I'll text you plans."
(Y/n) takes the card and smiles. "I guess I can. Maybe if I'm lucky I'll see a new side of you."
"Do you still have feelings for me or have you moved on?"
"You'll find out soon enough." She waves and walks away.
Dazai watches, then leaves with his partner.