Forelsket || taekook

31

Jungkook wasn't planning to sleep any time soon, his anxious mind didn't let it. Where was Taehyung? Where was his friends? Had Taehyung let him go now? he wanted answers. He laid in his bed for almost half an hour when he felt the door to his room creak slightly. Jae hyung was probably back. He looked at the door only to see Taehyung standing there and he felt his breath hitch in his throat.

He thought he was imagining him but there was no way that was a mirage because he looked too messed up to be a lie.

In the dim lights, Jungkook could see his eyes were blood shot as if he had cried the entire night, his hair was tousled and everywhere like he pushed his fingers through them again and again. His shirt and pants were wrinkled and overall, he just looked like he walked out of a hurricane.

Jungkook was silent as he watched him walk towards him with such care that it almost felt like his feet weren't making contact with the ground at all. The moment he was close enough to his bed, he fell to his knees so that he was on same eye level with him

"Please forgive me." Taehyung whispered as he stared at him with red glassy eyes.

"I thought I lost you. Please forgive me Jungkook. I love you a lot. I don't want to lose you. You can hate me but please don't leave me, I won't be able to bear that.It's all my fault that this happened to you." Taehyung continued to whisper as he stared at him intensely.

Jungkook looked at his sleeping family members right beside him and Taehyung and then back at Taehyung who looked like he was about to cry. One of these days, he really is going to get him killed.

"It wasn't your fault that I got shot. That was my own mistake." Jungkook said in a soft hushed voice.

"I wanted you to shoot me, if that meant letting go of even a fraction of your hate you had for me and accepting me, I was willing to take that bullet but you went and tried to kill yourself instead. I realized then that I can't imagine a world without you anymore. I didn't think the bullet would hit you. I am sorry. I just wanted to protect you. I have never experienced love before. No one told me it would be like this. No one told me you feel it so truly, so madly, so deeply. This feeling had overwhelmed me so please don't leave me alone Jungkook I can't survive this feeling alone. It will kill me." Taehyung whispered as his voice broke and he started looking down to avoid his eyes. Jungkook knew then that Kim Taehyung, the big bad wolf was crying.

"Don't apologize. I don't hate you, Taehyung. But I don't love you either. You know why I can't. You never gave me a chance to explain back then and things just fell out the way they did. Maybe it was fate that this had to happen but don't blame yourself. Maybe it is fate that we are stuck to each other like this that even if we try to let go, we keep meeting in one way or another. You are everything that I am avoiding but maybe God wants me to experience this feeling. Whatever this is. The more I try to push you away, the more problems I face as you can see so maybe God has a plan for us but right now, I can't say anything about it." Taehyung nodded his head in understanding as he wiped his face with his sleeves and looked back at him.

"I won't push you away Taehyung but I can't pull you in either but I want you to compromise as well. If I am willing to change certain rules of my life, you need to as well."

"I am ready to do that. Just tell me what you want me to do Jungkook, I will do it for you, anything." Taehyung said quickly and for the first time, Jungkook smiled at him. The very first time and Taehyung felt his heart skip a beat.

"How about for now, you just go back to your house or something so my family doesn't kill you and me if they see us like this? Can you do that?" Jungkook said softly and Taehyung smiled through his blood shot eyes as he slowly got up and started to leave.